Does part of your life feel like a LIE?

I would have to say yes. Over the years I have found that I go through phases where my life feels like an entire fraud. Then there are and were times where I felt I couldn't have planned it better. I guess much of it might have to do with my perspective that has been known to change. As I am getting older, I am coming to terms with the choices I have made and starting to notice that I there is green grass around me. I see it in the smiles on the faces I love.

I thought about that when I was a bit younger, I definitely know what you mean. A lie always has some truth behind it, which is because there's a pretty fine line between the two. What happens when you tell the truth and believes you, even if they say they do. Or if they believe your lies? In the end nothing matters what you say because someone can just as easily think or say the exact opposite. It's just everyone has their own perception. None of this bothers me though, I just do what I percieve to being 'true.' Anything along the way I'll say what's on my mind no matter how directly honest I can be. I really think it's more rude to say something nice that isn't true, than to be honest with a rude statement. So if I would be quick to leave the 'perfect' life with my appearingly happy husband, if I truly felt I wanted or needed something else.

i do feel trapped alot. i'm thinking from 2 perspectives that my whole life is a lie. fisrt of them is that my mom always taught me that truth is the most important, and everything can be forgiven if it's out on the open. when i did just that (express my feelings) she "punished" me for being honest. i don't mean honesty from a rude or illegal point of view, but the whole concept of honesty being the most important thing in life just went down the drains. the second point of view is about the example u gave. yes i feel trapped alot. i'm lucky for what i have, people think i'm lucky to have what i have, and yet none of my deepest wishes came true.

I don't have lies in my life, I think that lies are a terrible terrible thing, each lie leads to another and another until you have a series of lies that you can't get out of.

Not anymore. It used to be that way. My first marriage was miserable. And I look back now and have no idea why I stayed in it for 8 years. I finally left him for cheating, as bad as it sounds, I wish he had done it years earlier. I think I stayed with him because it was what I was "supposed" to do. We were high school sweethearts, and marriage was just the next step. A really long step. Neither of us was happy, but everyone we knew thought we sure were. I had friends who told me after I left him, that I completely destroyed their illusions. They were jealous and trying to aspire to have a marriage as great as mine. I had no idea I was such a good actress. After my marriage ended, I made a promise to myself that I wouldnt lie to myself again. If I am unhappy, then I am, and it is my responsibility to fix it. This marriage isnt going so great right now either (many posts, LOL) but at least I am honest enough with myself and others to let it be known that ther are problems and that I am not happy. I think perhaps that is the first step in getting happy, admitting that you arent. Both to yourself, and to others. I mean really why do we have to protect others at our own expense? That may sound harsh, but what I mean is why should I have to pretend to be happy just so that my family and friends get to continue to believe the illusions before them, thus making them happy. And now I think I am rambling, so I will just stop.

What a great question. The answer is a big YES. There are moments I find myself asking 'who I am and how did I get here?' At the present time my life is in a chaotic state of flux and what I'd really like is a little peace and tranquility. I am trying to figure out how to except all the parts of my life that don't seem to make sense and are a source of discomfort. Maybe we are tested on knowing who we are so we can be that much better at it.

I think everyone here and then have to lie to himself... That´s our nature and that´s the way we´ve got to defend ourselves for things we´re not sure if is right or wrong... I´ve had some cases when i was telling people that i was happy when i knew deep inside i wasn´t. I try my very best to avoid them and be happy with the chooses i make in life...

For me it would be staying stuck with difficult caregiving clients in the first year of caregiving because I was afraid I wasn't good enough at caregiving yet to be able to handle any other assignments. The office did not know I was unhappy till I told them because I put a good face on and didn't go in there to complain all the time. I have since moved on, and become happy, with different people to take care of. The rewards in being authentic and being assigned to people who value who I am -- not who I am not -- are amazing. I look forward to getting up in the morning now.

Wow ... thats a tough question but the first thing that comes to mind is that I appear like a free spirit to so many and that i live my life as i like and do whatever happens ... which is true ... i'm not usually constrained by jobs or money or really anything .... if i want to go I just up and leave .. but there is a down side .. because theres no security in my life ... i live for the moment and one moment at a time with out a care but now, i think ... i really do have to stop this because one day i will be selling roses under a turnpike ... i'm not getting any younger and i have nothing to show for my adventures but memories .. as good as that is ... its a bit scarey now ... and yet others wish they could do this ... well, they could but can they live with the uncertainty of it ...it does cost and weigh heavy on the mind I came home after 5 years of wandering and have actually got a job where i can put some money away and build something so my kids will have something when i die ... but honestly ...this scares me even more ... being stuck here ... being stuck in a rut ... that will kill me for sure ... I mean ... I have been on both sides of the fence ... i was married for 12 years had 3 kids and when i divorced I was stuck raising these kids by myself with no physical, finical, spiritual or emotional help ... i put in 20 plus years ... and i love them but i dont want to be stuck again ... maybe i just havent found that other person that i need in my life to make it ok to be stuck ...i dont know ... Did i take this question the wrong way? ..lol .. oh well, i just wanted to say by all of this .... being a free spirit and living on the edge or in the moment also has its draw backs .... it would be ok though, if you won the lottery .... smilin

That's a very intuitive post and I can bet any money I could afford that every person reading it can relate to it in some way.You could call it a 'lie' or running from something because you can't change it and don't want to keep thinking about it because you have no influence over it or at least you think that way.For me ,it's momentary and fortunately or unfortunately not in the present. I have few very good friends who open up to me and I get the feeling that each one of us has something they try to move away from or hide from the world and themselves. I once read that when such a pain becomes too traumatic to live with,it might give rise to split personalities .Our mind creates an unreal person who could take over when we want to escape this pain.I would not like to ever be faced with something so serious that would make me yearn to be someone else and not who I am.I prefer a remembrance from my past bothering me to living with something I have to run away from.

yes i do. and most of the people i know have. lately i realized that there are too many of those things in my life so i decided to stop some of the things that bothered me and start fixing the others. and somtimes you "lie" to the other cause you do not want him or her to "carry" all of your pain..that is also a possibilitty

Yes, very much so. I love my kids and wouldn't change having them but sometimes I just want to runaway. Life has become one "big pattern" of just going thru the motions and acting content with your life.Afraid to change things , yes!

most of times our life passes thru suc turns that itz hard to survive thru. So, life is not the same as (it shud be) we are shown in childhood.

For the past two years I've lied to one person or another about one thing or another. I do not feel guilty about this nor do I wish I had done otherwise. I do not feel that any part of my life is a lie. If I were pretending to be someone I am not by staying in a relationship I would rather not be in or in a job I would rather not be doing I only have myself to blame for being unhappy. Anyone unhappy with their life as it is because of a decision they have made or are making only have themselves to blame. They have the power to make their mind up to change. You didn't offer and response to your own question for us. One can only assume you are happy with the decisions you have made and where you are today, with who you are and are comfortable with your life as it is and where it is heading. Good for you.

Sometimes life do sound a lie, we cant achieve what we want. So there is no use of living, unless you get your happiness

good lord people, whats wrong with you, quit whining and get out and live your lives...is there is something in your life you dont like, change it, this country has gotten way to sissyfied.