After your child leaves home?

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I am a mother of three daughters. My oldest is 19,and left home moved in with her dad at 16. She left my home to live with her dad, because I had rules and guidlines, she no longer wanted to follow and her dad was and is more willing to bend, and let her run wild. And that is just what she done...now at 19 she has a 3 month old little girl, whom I love very much, my first grandbaby girl. My daughter is not married, and still not growing up in alot of areas. She still wants to act as if she has no responsealities. She will not hold a job over 2 weeks, finds some reason to quit. She is now living with a friend from high school, with my grandbaby...A friend thats parents put in apartment and pays her bills, and give her everything and has no responseablities. I stay worried and upset most of the time, because I did not raise her to be this way, I always show her and tried to teach her, reponsablity fails on her. Now that she has a baby, I thought she would grow-up and realize, its her responsablity to care for and raise her, make sure she is in a safe, sucure invirement...stable..etc... I try not to preach at her, as she calls it, about everything. Praying that some day soon the way she was raised and will come to the suface. I never rewarded her bad behavior, would not give in to her demands...which by the way, only started after she hit high school, and mom suddenly got stupid and she suddenly knew better than me, and knew more than me. And the funny thing is, when she really needs good advice, or sound reality check, she calls me or shows up here. If she is upset, feeling hurts, not sure what to do...she always comes to ME, MOM! I listen, and then give her my best advice..or comfort her, if needed. But even in that I remind her of whats right and wrong...and she knows when she ask me how I will react to what ever it maybe. I am here for her but I cant live her life for her...Just worried...what to do?