how do u get rid of a crazy boyfriend....?

@tinam13 (839)
United States
March 7, 2007 3:26pm CST
help, my mom is in a really bad relationship right now and she doesnt know how to get rid of the guy. he is evil and he is a thief and a control freak. she will be with him all day long and the minute he leaves here or she leaves him he stalks her and leaves her sick messages. i dont like the guy AT ALL, he treats my mom like s*it, and im sick of it. every time she tells him its over he doesnt take the hint, he doesnt care, and he threatens everything we have. he has threatened to get my mom fired from her job and when she ignores him and tries to cut him off, he will CALL her job to talk to her, and that gets her in trouble. just last night he threatened to tell one of my moms friends a whole bunch of crap so they couldnt be friends anymore. i dont like him at all, and he also stole money from me and my little brother, i confronted him and made him pay us back, i didnt tell my mom bc i didnt wanna get her involved. what should my mom do!?!...help,suggestions, stories??
2 people like this
4 responses
• United States
7 Mar 07
I think your mom should get a restraining order. We all want the best for our friends and family , but sometimes they have to want it for themselves. If your mom is not ready to leave then she will continue to be with him. She has to get to her rock bottom. Once she reaches her rock bottom then she will be ready to leave. Just make sure that you are not apart of this cycle with her.
1 person likes this
@tinam13 (839)
• United States
7 Mar 07
my mom told me last night "this is it"...she was so serious and i get why. she called the cops on him a few weeks ago because he was harrassing her like he is now an the cops arrested him. he was told that he had to stay 5,000 feet away from her and he still stalks her down anyway, the court date is coming up on the 9th, and she's not sure if she wants to follow through with it because he told her there would be consequences for that, and i dont wanna tell my mom to make the wrong move, bc i dont want anything to happen to her.
1 person likes this
@cyrux004 (948)
• India
7 Mar 07
how come your mom tolerate such a man for a while. There are two things you can do now. Either get a person whom this guy is afraid off and try to threaten him.If this works , good, else shifting off to a different location seems to be the only option
1 person likes this
7 Mar 07
It sounds likeyou are all having a pretty hard time of it. I hope your mother does realise what her boyfriend is like now and feels the same way as you because wwithout her support there is nothing you can do. First off, I would recommend your mother to speak to her employer and explain what is h appeneing and that he has threatened to get her fired and that she does no longer wish to accept calls from him. Hopefully her employers will understand and try to help her. Call the police, I do not mean on the emergency number and explain to them your concerns. Preferably get your mother to do it. It means if any incidents do happen they will be quicker in dealing with it as they will already have all the background sorted out. Maybe she should speak to her lawyer as well and let her know just in case anything should come about. Other than that you all need to be calm and be consistent with the message you are sending out and make sure that is no contact. There is no point in your mother speaking to him firther as this will only send crossed messages to him. Make sure friensd and family know what is going on in case he approaches them and it means they can keep an eye on you too. Maybe tell the neighbours too so they can call the police if they see him hanging about. And this is something that I would really strongly recommend even if you feel it is a bot over the top - get personal alarms. You know the ones you set off if approached by a stranger. They just make a really6 loud noise and attract attention. Even if you do not feel he may be violent at the moment just think how rapidlty that could change. The guy obviously has issues in dealing with emotions and I think you should take as many precaustionary measures as possible. I do really wish you all good luck and I will be thinking of you. Make sure you are there for your mum unconditionally as she really does need you and I am sure I do not need to tell you that she does not need someone saying I told you so. I think she already reailses how big a mistake it was getting involved with him and sh emay be blaming herself. Good luck and I hope all goes well.
• United States
9 Mar 07
she seriously needs to leave him scared or not!!!its bad and it gets worse trust me.i got physically beaten everyother day by my ex.he told me if i ever left him hed kill me.well i recently left him.no he didnt take it well actually he busted al lmy house windows and tried to get in my house to hurt me.after that incident and i called the cops he hasnt bothered me since.he still calls once in a while but thats cuz we have a kid together.if you dont want your mom to get beat by this guy you need to sit down and talk to her...tell her she needs to leave him because it doesnt get better it always gets worse.