I was too a good mom!

You know, I too had divorced parents and was raised basically by my mother. My dad did pay support and we had regular visitation with him. I do this same thing sometimes and remember things that I didn't think were quite fair or things that I did not like about growing up. I never talk about it with my parents because I don't want to hurt their feelings. More importantly, when I am thinking of the negatives, I realize that I am at a point in my life where things aren't going my way or I am unhappy with a certain situation that I am in. When this comes up I realize that I am just trying to find someone else to blame for my current situation. Maybe that is what is going on with your daughter. I am not saying that she is doing it on purpose, I think it is a subconsious thing. When she works out her problem all will be forgotten again until something else goes wrong for her. It is part of our selfish nature.

I can relate to your story from the other end though. I have 2 sisters and my parents split up when I was 5. My dad always paid child support. But my mom still had it tough. We always had an amazing house and we all always had our own rooms. My mom got a college diploma, I think after my parents had already split, but that was it, she didn't get a degree until we were all grown. She worked as a bookkeeper for a used auto part shop and didn't earn very much. But she worked hard and did her best. We were always in extra-curricular activities too...sports, music, whatever we wanted. I never appreciated her when I was younger. It wasn't until I "grew up" that I really realized how great a mother she really was. I'm sorry to hear about the trouble you are having. Perhaps someday she will see the light and realize how hard you worked too. Perhaps when she has children of her own.