how do you say no to a friend?
By pagli84
@pagli84 (1850)
Netherlands
March 7, 2007 6:05pm CST
ive had this friend for the past few months. he's a really sweet and nice guy, but the past few weeks have made me really uncomfortable. he keeps sending me these hints that he wants something more, but im not interested at all. and ive tried to hint that im not interested, but somehow he just doesnt understand. ive been resisting his advances, but i dont want to hurt his feelings and i dont want to lose him as a friend. its gotten to the point that im really uncomfortable around him, and i dont even want to talk to him when he brings up things like this. what do i do?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@pebbles_cubbie (3789)
• United States
8 Mar 07
Tell him that you aren't interested in anything more than a friendship with him. If he can't understand that then it's his problem. He'll see that you are right someday if he doesn't when you explain it to him. Tell him that it makes you uncomfortable and that's not what you want. Tell him you want things to go back to normal before he started hitting on you. I think if he's a true friend he will understand this. Good luck.
@Stringbean (1273)
• United States
8 Mar 07
It's time to stop hinting and let him know that you just want to be friends. Maybe you could tactfully say, "You know I really enjoy being friends with you, but I don't think I'm being fair by monopolizing your time when you could be out there finding a girl that wants to be more than a friend. I haven't really found anyone like that yet, myself, but I'm hoping I will someday."
If he objects and says, he wants to be that guy, just say, "We have been good friends for so long, I just can't seem to think of you in any other way. It would probably be best for both of us if we stopped hanging around with each other so much and tried to develop other relationships."
Since you are already beginning to be uncomfortable around him, I wouldn't worry too much about losing him as a friend. You can still be friendly when you run into him, but I would cool it whether he likes it or not.
