Tipping When Dining Out.

She was probably concerned about her quality of service as well, wondering if she had done something to offend you and I am sure she would not want to repeat it. Also, don't forget that waiters and waitress often work for way below minimum wage. This isn't just a tip to them, it is their salary. I would think that you should have explained it to your husband before hand since tips are te livelyhood of the service people.

Oh my this was so RUDE. I used to waitress on occassion when I was a teenager as well as I was a tour guide and not once did I EVER chase down a customer to more or less ask for a tip. That is just so tacky. When I was a tour guide, there was a sign posted at the end of the tour where anyone could see 'gratuities appreciated but not expected' so that people knew that it was ok to tip (some places it is not accepted) and that was all anyone ever needed. Though I know that there were many many times that I know I gave good service and felt I went above and beyond the call of duty to please a customer or make their experience a pleasurable one and no tip was given and that was fine with me also. I knew that some people just did not tip. I personally would have noted the name on the name tag and talked to management. I do however love your comment to hers. Brillant answer.

I guess I might have a different view than most on this... I worked as a waiter for a year and a half and also worked in food service at a Starbucks. It was definitely tacky that the waitress asked for a tip, no question about it. But I know for a fact that while I might not have asked for a tip, I cared enough about my job to wish that everyone had a good experience with me as their waiter. When I would see a table without a tip left, I would wonder whether or not it was a slight, or I was a bad server, or if there was a problem with the orders. I am a stickler for those things. Maybe what I would have done was not necessarily phrase it the way your waitress did. She could have worded it differently if it was really about her service. If she was fishing for a tip, then it really didn't matter how it was put.

I rarely gave tips to waiter or waitress. It depends sometimes. If i am very satisfy with their service i don't usually get the change, meaning it theirs already. But we dont really use to giving tips.

yes it is. i never heard a situation like you had. first of all it is a custom to give a tip but you do not have to do it. i do not always give a tip i know tat i tackled situations that waitress was very impationed and unpolite so i decided not to give her anything but usually i try giving a very nice tip but what happened to you is unbelievable..

Oh well!.... What I know is... tip or giving tip is a voluntary act. You give it when you are satisfied with the service. Here in our country, when I dine out in a restaurant with my family or friends, and we ask for the bill, we often read what's inside the bill, see if the food listed in the bill are the ones we had ordered and see if the computation for the total bill is correct because there are instances that some food are listed even though we had not ordered or sometimes a wrong entry of price. Then we look if there is a service charge. If there is no service charge, then we would give a tip. If there is no service charge, often we dont give tip, unless we like to tip because of very good food and nice service.

That is very odd. I have lived in the US all my life and I have never, ever run across anything like that. I could find a way to get a message to her supervisor. That is very rude. She probably knew that you were not a "local" and thought that you didn't know anything about tipping. Either way - very very rude and should have never happened. I'm sorry that you got a bad taste in your mouth due to this one instance.

I've been a waitress before and I would NEVER ask a customer for a tip. I think she could've easily been fired if her boss knew that she asked a customer for a tip. It's not the right thing to do. But I'm curious as to what you did when she asked.

Yes, that was extremly taxcky and rude of that person. She had no right to ask for a tip. I myself have enver been one for the idea of tipping even though I do, do it. Why should we have to pay for the food and then pay he person to bring it to us? when I was a farmer I didn't get tipped for bring in the crops or anything like that. The reason for tipping I have heard is they get such low pay. Is that my fault and should I have to make up the difference? If I was you and that happened to me I would have just ignored her.

My husband often pays at the check out for his tip as well as the meal. We have never had this happen to us. The places we go, we can trust the cashier to forward the tips. I sometimes wonder about the busboys, so that is one reason we tip as we leave. I know waitresses are paid sub minimum wage, with the expectation that they will more than make up for it in tips, but that sounded like desperation to me.

yeah that is really tacky. I have worked at dunkin dounuts it's not a resturant but you still bring there dounuts if they sit down. I never once worried about a tip. I was glad and happy to get one but if not that's alright too.

I can't believe that she followed you into the lobby and asked you like that. How tacky!! I would have told her she shouldn't have been asking for a tip and I sure wouldn't leave one after she asked you for it. I would have said well my husband thought the tip was included in the bill because he's new here and I'd tell her that I've never been followed out and been asked why I didn't leave a tip.

That is extremely tacky. I live in London and normally service charge is included within the bill. However I will add a tip if I feel that I have received a really good overall service; more so if the waiter/waitress has made a concsious effort to ensure that my experience at the restaurant was a good one.

I can understand this women frustration. He in the US servers makes a little over $2 an hour. Hardly enough to live off. Therefore, they have to count on tips to make it. My wife was a server for years while she was going to school. There were days where she would come home and would have been better working fast food. Other days were great. It was very frustrating and I am sure that if the server did a great job then she should be paid accordingly. It took guts for her to approach you guys like this.

That's funny. Sometimes they figure the tip into the bill here now too. We had a small birthday party for my mom at a local restaurant recently and they told me on the phone when I made reservations that the tip would be figured into the bill. I always tip anyway so I said fine but I got to thinking, what if we had a really bad waitress that did not refill our drinks or check on us? The tip would have been the same.

I think it was terrible for that waitress to follow you to the door looking for a tip. I must ask my daughter when she gets home from work if she would do that but I think I know her better than that. The only people she has chased is someone that has dined and dashed. In otherwords ate and left without paying the bill.

The waitress was correct in her manner. They work for tips and when she discovered there was none, she most likely checked with the cashier first to see if one was left on a credit card. Approaching you and asking you what was wrong is because she thought you might have complained about her service and she wished to know what was lacking. I didnt consider her question "asking for a tip". As a daughter of a waitress and one myself when younger and in college, those tips make up 60% of their salary and unless something was wrong, you should have given the tip while your husband was unfamilar with American dining out customs. I think walking away and laughing about the matter or simply blaming your husband's inexperience as an excuse not to tip extremely rude.

Elusivebutterfly, You've already explained that your husband didn't understand the concept of tipping in the US and you should not have to continue to explain this. The fact is that the server should not have confronted you on this matter. I waited tables for a number of years and I would never have been so bold. I just would have cussed you out later. LOL I think I've learned something from this discussion. Servers need to understand, as hard as it may be when your livlihood is on the line, that different countries work differently. Tourists need to understand local customs when they dine out in a foreign country. To those of you who live in the US and still don't tip waiters and waitresses...If I can't say something nice, I just won't say anything.

well to me tip depends only on the mood of the customer weither he or she is willing to give or not .. its is not the core part of anything or any dinning place. it just depend on the consumer. this story was really weird that waitress asking her self for a tip as it is the part of bill

It doesn't sound to me like she was asking for a tip, if anything it sounds like she was wondering if her service was acceptable, and when you replied yes, she was confused as to why there was nothing left on the table. I wouldn't have thought it was rude or tacky. She was just confused, and probably unexperienced.