New dog has to go

First of all you are not a failure. But you say, "I wanted to prove to everyone that even tho I am a single mom, I can handle all the things that a family with 2 parents could" and that's why you got the dog. Wrong reason. It is wrong to use a living breathing feeling loving creature for some sort of personal trial. This poor animal will be sitting on the cold concrete floor at the shelter wondering why she is there. Now that I probably made you feel worse, I went thru the same thing... I literally took one of my dogs off the animal control truck b/c she was beautiful. I had not planned on introducing another dog intp my household - it was a split second decision. She tore everything up for weeks/months. I was a nervous wreck. I had to keep telling myself that I had basically made her a promise when I took her in that no matter what, I would NOT give up on her. Finally all this tapered off and ended and today I couldn't have a better companion. btw, I have no one to help me either.

I have been there, done that. Somehow no matter how much my kids beg for a pet, and promise to do the chores.. I end up with the responsibility. My friends joke when I complain about the cats we have now "oh another pet hits the dust". Pets are like kids and require a lot. I have five kids, and I am pregnant with number 6. I need more responsibility like I need a whole in my head! LOL Seriously = I need a vacation!

What kind of dog was it?

is she getting plenty of exercise? the best dogs are tired ones!! But don't give up, I'm sure you can find a good fit, sometimes it just takes some more research. I've got a really mellow dog, who just sleeps all day. He's a retired greyhound. They are the laziest dogs on earth, I swear. I take him walking with me in the morning for about 30 minutes and then he sleeps ALL DAY until around 4 or 5 and then he's ready to go on another walk. Sometimes he wants to play, but he never jumps up on people or barks. He doesn't even rip up the squeaky toys we give him. My point is, some breeds of dog are just more energetic than others. herding dogs -- heelers, sheepdogs, etc-- as well as terriers can be very, very high energy and rowdy. Maybe a greyhound or a basset hound would be better suited to your needs? good luck, and I hope everything works out for the best!

i understand that the dogs is making a mess. but think about it, the dog doesnt speak, you have to train the dog. you bought the dog for a reason, to give love and to be less lonely. Train the dog so that she will listen and she will change.

Oh don't feel like a failure. I got a Boston Terrier puppy about a year ago and I was not sure that I would make it even a week. Fortunately, she has calmed down, but it was touch and go for awhile. You can't have any pet that is going to cause you this much stress. I wish you well !

Don't be so hard on yourself! Taking on any animal from an animal shelter can be challenging in so many ways, due to the fact that you don't always know the animals full history. When a family is involved, it's always a good idea to take an animal on a 'trial' basis. I'm glad to hear that you have given an animal, without much hope of a 'better' future, a chance, but sometimes, their history can compromise a fruitful future. He doesn't sound as though he is really trying to cause any harmful damage, he's just a bit to playful! Depending on the age of the dog, there are many ways to work through this, but it's going to take alot of time and effort on your part. Proper training and discipline is paramount. There are many good books out there and maybe a trip to, or a visit from an animal behaviourist will help. I'm a dog owner, breeder and trainer, specifically to border collies. Always remember. To understand and be able to interact successfully with a dog, be a dog! Not a human talking 'english and expecting the dog to understand'. Here's an example for you, the only way I get my male fly-ball collie to behave when we enter a show ground, is to growl at him! Don't think of yourself as a failure. Either take the challenge head on and do the training, or rather give the dog back and opt for a puppy that can be raised with the family. It's all very challenging in the short-run, but at the end of the day, it's rewarding for EVERYONE. Good Luck!!!

How old is she? The way I read that, I'd think she's a puppy (under 2 anyway). As she gets older she should grow out of all those things. It's nothing you did, or didn't do. It's just how dogs are. Esp in a new environment. Don't feel like a failure because it's not your fault.

OK - you probably won't like me for saying this - but this post made me really angry, and I felt I had to respond. Dogs, (and all animals) are living, breathing creatures that can feel pain and suffering, and to take one on and then discard it so quickly is just plain cruel, and wrong. Dogs need love, caring, time, affection, exercise - they are not just an inaminate plaything for your kids, or something to prove yourself. This poor creature is just playing because she has been starved of affection all her life, and wants to play just like a lonely child would do. By throwing her back to the shelter, you are breaking her heart, and she may develop behavioural problems that no other owner will be able to manage. You may have proved something to yourself, and won't make the same mistake again, but what has the poor dog got out of this - nothing! Sorry again to offend you - regulars here will know I am not normally this outsopken, but people who treat animals with so little respect drive me crazy with anger. Please think things through more carefully in the future, for the sake of any other poor animal that may come your way.

I am sure you are not a failure terriors are very high spirited and need lots of things to do lots of walks would help not only the dog but would help your spirit as well i am also a single mom i have a special needs child and i also have a houseful of pets they do take a lot of your time and energy but i enjoy my pets you just need to pick your pets carefully do a little research and find a pet that suits your family best a hyper dog like a terrior may not be it but there are plenty of dogs that are not so time consumming again you are not a failure sometimes i feel that way too but it passes things get better.

Please don't be down on yourself for not being ready for the dog. Maybe instead of the animal shelter, you could find an adoption only place or find someone who wants a dog. Vets are excellent places to post a picture. For clarification, you have got to realize that you don't have ANYTHING to prove to ANYONE. Anyone who has kids knows how difficult it would be to be a single parent. I feel bad for you because it seems like you are suffereing from burnout. Just moved, lots of changes, taking care of the kids and daily life, and trying to train a dog to act half decent? Sounds like you need a break. I would definately find the dog a new home because you will all be happier that way. Maybe the kids could agree on a smaller, easier pet to start with? Maybe a gerbil? Or a bird? They don't need as much attention as a dog. As far as being two parents, it's impossible. You are only ONE person but there's no reason why your children can't live a wonderful, full life with only YOU!! The most important thing to remember in that is that you have to be healthy and happy to give them that. If you want to talk more, I will be happy to listen. Good luck!!

Your kids sound like they're a bit too young for such a dog, IMHO I think you should indeed have waited a few more years. I understand the kids wanting a pet, but you should have considered if they were old/big enough for a busy dog. I truly don't think you're a failure btw, not at all, but did you have any experience with dogs prior to this? It sounds like the dog needs a lot of training and attention, the animal shelter should have told you what kind of dog she was. She sounds awfully sweet though and I'm sure another family will take her, and I think you're a good person for at least trying to take her in. Would you be willing at all to train her more? Just a firm yes or no would already work wonders with certain dogs. And talking about experience, I've had cats all my life and I thought I had plenty of experience, but my kitten (he's 8 months now, we've survived so far!) really was something special, I spent the first couple of weeks in complete despair because he was so wild and so different from our previous cats, some of which we'd known since they were kittens! We trained him (as far as cats can be trained, heh) and got used to him and he's much better now.

Please don't feel bad. I've been there and believe me - you did the right thing. My dog as a 9-month old labrador mix. He's very friendly but also way too hyper. He does all the things you just wrote about, the jumping, the love bites, the tearing up. It is a big responsibility but you shouldn't feel like a failure. You gave her your affection but you were also wise enough to let her go and you've given her another chance to find someone that will match her disposition. Being a single parent takes a lot of courage and i take my hat off to you!

I dont think this makes you a failure. You just need to find a calmer, maybe little older dog to bring home. You have kids to take care of you don't need a wild dog running around. If you want a well behaived dog, good for kids you should consider a golden retriever or lab. I also saw on a show that Great Danes are really really good with kids, but not sure i fyou wont a dog that big or not

It sounds like the dogs just needs to be trained. I recomend crate training it so that while you're not at home, or when you can't pay complete attention to it, it can be in the crate & not destroying everything. I'm sure the dog would benefit from some basic obedience classes. Every dog is going to have it's faults & they all should go through some sort of basic obedience class. They're all different, just like kids. You're not a failure...maybe you just need to either try obedience with the dog you currently have, or try to find one that might fit your family/lifestyle a little better.

Well, the dog does not know any better, and really thinks that it is playing. You should find a trainer before taking the dog back to the shelter. A dog needs to be taught proper behavior and is not automatically a good dog. You should really try before returning it.

Along with training the dog you'll have to train your kids how to behave around the dog. If they are excited or running through the house the dog will too. You basically have 3 children now, which means teaching the dog all of your house rules also. Have a spot for the dog to have "time out" just like a child the dog will learn that is where it goes when it's in trouble. If you feel this dog is definately to much. Then maybe get a smaller one. Or wait a little while longer until you are more settled in your house.

I'm sorry. How big of a dog did you get. Why don't you try a little one. You won't be a failure becouse you can't handle a dog. Thier are two parents in our home and all of our dogs are outside and still it is hard on us. As long as you are a good mother that is what your children will remember.

You're not a failure at ALL. Dogs tend to be a lot of work at the best of times. A terrier probably wasn't such a good choice, because they're working dogs and so have a lot of energy that they need to burn off. It sounds like she just needs some firm training that can be fixed quickly with Training/Obedience classes. It might also be an idea to start crate training her. Then she can at least be indoors while you're out. This will also help if she's messing in the house instead of outdoors. Make sure it's just big enough for her to have a bed on there and a few toys. Dogs typically don't mess where their bed is, so make sure it's not too big, otherwise she'll mess and then play at the other end. I hope you get this sorted. If you have to take her back, maybe you could get something a little less hyper. Good Luck.

Your kids safety first then you will be taught how to tame the dog.take back the dog and maybe get a smaller one that won't threaten your kids .i still think you can manage on your own(independent woman)no one to answer to and still have the love for your kids and friends.hang in there lady but take that dog back for a smaller one and learn to tame it for the safety of your kids.