What will i do? Please help...
By babynanan
@babynanan (133)
Philippines
March 16, 2007 2:00am CST
I am currently in a relationship right now and we've been together for 5yrs but my mother won't approve of him bec. she don't like the family background. I already finished school and currently working. I was caught last Dec.25,2004 and now Jan.1,2007. These are the most unforgettable moments of my life..hehee :) But the family of my bf really loves me and took good care of me when I will visit them, i really feel as part of their family. My mother told me to choose between them but I didnt. We are still together until now but we don't see each other often coz im afraid that someone will see us and it's okay with my bf coz accdg to him,he understands. i am really happy with my bf now. But then there are times that i feel so tired of keeping the relationship bec. we can't see each other and we fight sometimes that i decided to call it quits but my bf will not approve. He said that he can sacrifice coz time comes that everything will be okay.
So, that's it..What will i do? Will I take the risk of being with him still? Will i follow my bf or my mother? I really appreciate your time for giving your response. :)
1 person likes this
2 responses
@mylesnarvaez (5451)
• Philippines
16 Mar 07
do you still live with your mom? it's hard to ignore what your mom wants you to do if you are living under her care. and the fact that our culture has taught us to respect our parents.
as time passes, it would be more difficult to keep the relationship with your boyfriend a secret. you can't go on like this forever. sooner or later your mom will need to be told. you don't have to choose between your boyfriend and your mom. what you need is to talk about it openly and try to reach a compromise.
being a mom, you can't take it against her if she watches out for you even after you left school and now that you are working. you are still her daughter no matter what age you are in.
ask your mom why she doesn't approve of him. aside from his background. ask what he could do so she would approve your boyfriend for you. talk about it with her. involve her so you could generate trust and approval. make her feel that her opinion matters but make her understand that she raised you well enough as well. well enough to make your own decisions and be responsible for it.
be honest to her that you love her but you also love your boyfriend. let her know how you feel about this matter. let her know how this is affecting you.
you just might be surprised. moms can be really understanding when you lay down your cards right. goodluck!
@babynanan (133)
• Philippines
16 Mar 07
Yup, i still live with my mom coz she won't allow me to separate from her. She is so protective that even my bro who is 26yrs old, she still calls his cellphone to tell him to go home. I already told my mother by writing her a letter that I am still with my bf and that i really love her so much, I also assure her that i know what I am doing and knows my limitations. She didn't say anything after that. i even asked myself is she really read my letter. I perfectly understand my mom but then i want to make my own decision coz she always makes the decision. what course to take and everything. thanx 4 d response..
@mylesnarvaez (5451)
• Philippines
16 Mar 07
she misses your brother. and she is afraid to lose you too. she must be scared stiff in facing the fact that her babies have grown up. you can't begrudge your mom that. to her, her children (you, your brother and perhaps your other siblings too if you have any) are her world.
she must be a full-time mom 24/7, isn't she? she needs to focus her attention and energies to some other stuff than her children. how about introducing her to a hobby or an interest? something to occupy her mind and to make her quit worrying about you guys...
just a thought.
@babynanan (133)
• Philippines
16 Mar 07
Why do you say that it's wrong? What made you say that? Can you tell me more about it? :)
thanx!!
