What's the big deal? .......leave a message!!!
By mckenziemom
@mckenziemom (522)
United States
March 16, 2007 12:48pm CST
I would have to say that my biggest complaint from my family and in-laws is that I do not always answer my phone. I would say that if my phone rings there is about a 50% chance I will answer it before my voice mail picks up. I think the assumption is becase I am a stay at home mom that I am not very busy I should answer the phone by the first or second ring. Nothing could be further from the truth!!
Like a lot of moms out there know firsthand staying home with your children is a full-time job, with the addition of household chores,cooking meals and in my case homeschooling my two oldest, answering the phone right away is not always my first priority. I mean come on...would you stop changing your kid's diaper or playing on the floor with them or interrupt dinner to make a mad dash to the phone? Not me!!
I have a understanding with my other SAHM friends that if we don't answer by the 2nd or 3rd ring, you know I am busy so just leave a message no problem!! We are not slaves to our phones!!!
I have a strict policy about not answering my phone early
in the morning during breakfast and homeschooling and I never answer my phone at dinnertime. Despite my attempts to enlighten the family I still get calls..... and they go to my voicemail.However, listening to my voicemail and returning urgent messages is something I always do.
What about you? Do you always answer your phone right away or do you let the voicemail pick up? Do you have certain times of the day when you do not answer your phone?
4 people like this
20 responses
@RobinJ (2501)
• Canada
17 Mar 07
excellent discussion. I agree with you about being a slave to a phone, And you are right you do have your priorities straight and believe it or not they are wrong. I was given heck by my ex husband for not picking up his call. I told him I was doing some thing important, having a nap. And I even put that on my machine, It said Hi I can't take your call right now I am either having a nap or out having fun. I will get back to you soon.That was on my machine for years. I do not have caller ID as I can't afford it, and the answering machine is my own, So Good on for you, Let them talk to the machine. who needs complaints, and grouches.
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
17 Mar 07
Thanks RobinJ for your support. When I get little remarks from family and inlaws about not picking up my phone right away it makes me feel like the only person in the world who felt this way. The responses here have been so great and empowering...my phone is not my life!!!
@vampirestonez (1181)
• Pakistan
17 Mar 07
I agree with you on this, I mean there is something caal phone manners and I also do not answer the phone if it is early in the morning.
My friends and family know that very well and leave me a voice message if it is something urgent and I try to get back to them.
It is the same for my ceel phone, I have installed an call answering software and I when I just get a voice mail, i check it out immeadiately and if it is something of an urgent matter then I try to get back as soon as possible but if it something just the ususal then I get back to the caller after I am over from my tasks.
It is the same rule that I apply at my work place, if I am busy I won't answer my cell phone because it breaks the momentum of work and thus can be very distracting.
Phones are for our convenience and not the other way around.
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
17 Mar 07
Its funny that you mentioned work. As a SAHM we are "on the job" 24/7 without lunch breaks. I am always in the middle of something and just not willing to drop everything to "chat" on the phone. Thanks for your response vampirestonez.
@dmillman (2273)
• United States
17 Mar 07
Cell phones are for the convenience of the owner, not the caller. If it's important, they'll leave a message, is my motto. If I don't know the caller, most of the time I won't answer the phone. If it's someone I know, they always leave a message - even if they don't need me to call back. My thought is also, what would they do if I didn't have a cell phone?
I'm only particular about getting calls or checking messages right away, when there's something going on in the family or something. For instance, when my grandmother was dying, I kept it with me at all times, on vibrate, just in case. I knew the call would be from my mother, so if I noticed it was her, I would take it right away or check the message right away. It was my lifeline to my family during such difficult times.
Again, it's for the owner's convenience, not the caller - that I definitely agree.
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
17 Mar 07
Good points dmillman. I too have had some calls during difficult family times when I have walked around the house with phone in hand. Those times are never fun. In those instances though it is nice to be able to carry the phone around with me and to take those important calls right away.
@Debs_place (10520)
• United States
17 Mar 07
I pay for my phone, my phone is there for my convenience not their's. As soon as these people start paying my bills and my way through life, they can start telling me what to do, and the includes answering my telephone.
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
17 Mar 07
You're right!! They certainly don't pay my bills,but they sure do make me feel bad when I don't answer their call right away. Thank for your views.
@lols189 (4742)
•
16 Mar 07
sometimes i do not answer my phone but thats only if i am really busy. i dont answer my phone when i am in college as i am not allowed. i answer my voicemails on my break time. other than that i always answer my phone. i understand why you dont answer as your children are your main priority
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
17 Mar 07
No matter what is going on in people's lives there are gonna be times when we answering the phone is not a priority. That's what is so great about voicemail. Thanks for you response lols189.
@dfinster (3528)
• United States
16 Mar 07
You're preaching to the choir sister,LOL! I have had it with the telephone thing. There's lots of times I'm home and even if I'm just gardening or watching a movie I won't stop what I'm doing for the phone. My hubby acts like it's gonna be the end of the wold if we don't run and pick it up whenever it rings. Sometimes in the summer it's hilarious to watch him do this. Our backyard is about 3 and a half acres and the one garden is almost all the way back by the woods. If we're outside and the phone rings he'll actually take off running across the backyard or try to get out f the pool in time to grab the phone before the voicemail picks up on the third ring.
I tell him all the time we don't have to kill ourselves to get to the phone and that's what voicemail is for, but I guess he doesn't feel the same. Oh well, I guess it's good exercise for him, LOL!
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
16 Mar 07
What is it with some men and the phone? My husband is just as goofy about the phone. My husband is a business owner and he has employees that call him sometimes during the weekend or he gets calls from his business partner. You would think the way he tries to get to the phone he owns a fortune 500 company!! Seldom is it an emergency,but it is irritating because it cuts into family time. 90% of the time it is a non-emergency situation...he needs to let it go at least for the weekend.
@kgwat70 (13388)
• United States
17 Mar 07
I do not always pick up my phone right away as I am sometimes in another room or busy doing something that needs immediate attention. I also check my caller id to see if I recognize who is calling me or not. I have all my friends and family programmed into my phone and will answer the ones that are in there, if I am not busy. We should not be required to pick up right away since we all may be busy doing different things during the day. People should just leave a message on our voice mail. I do not see why people can not leave messages.
1 person likes this
@trouble4u2avoid (2915)
• United States
17 Mar 07
In general I gave up answering my phone as soon as my kids hit their teenage years. Most of my friends and family know if they are going to get in touch with me they need to call in the morning before everyone gets home from school.
I don't spend a lot of time on the phone, I have other things I would rather be doing with my time. I do spend some time on the phone with my family when they call because I live in Florida and they live in NJ.
A lot of my friends here get annoyed because I don't pick up their calls and I got rid of my cell phone. Maybe it's wrong but if they don't leave a message, I'm going to assume the call wasn't important and chances are it was just to shoot the breeze.
1 person likes this
@theproperator (2429)
• United States
16 Mar 07
I agree with you. Phones are for the convience of the owner, not the caller. When I got my cell phone and dropped my home phone, people were like "Great, I can call you any time now" and I would say "Go ahead, but I might not answer, because a good time for you to talk may not be a good time for me to talk." Most people will now leave a message. If they don't, I don't usually call them back.
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
16 Mar 07
That is usually my course of action as well. Everyone knows if they leave me a message I will certainly call the back as soon as I can. Thanks theproperator for your response.
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
17 Mar 07
I usually leave a message. I have no idea about voice mail, I cannot even set it up for my own phone, but even so, I usually let the person know that I called, if they can reach me, or I got the wrong number. Usually it is about the sixth ring before my son's voice mail catches on and one of my friends you have to ring about the eighth or tenth ring so three to four rings is cutting it short. (I would assume you are busy, getting your key out entering the door when it is on the third ring unless you set your voice mail to respond by then.)
1 person likes this
@howard96h (11640)
• New York, New York
16 Mar 07
I hate when people complain to me that I didn't run, twist an ankle, knock a few things down on the way to answer their phone call! I have a life you know, if I didn't answer your call it's because I was not able to at the moment so stop the drama and leave a message. I refuse to explain why I missed their call. Those people who complain always ask, why didn't you answer the phone, what were you doing. This annoys me and I tell them, it's none of your business what I was doing, I was not able to take your call that's it. I have only one show on TV that comes on two times a week, an hour long and I ask everyone DO NOT call me during this show. Now you know what I am going to say next, that's right, they call and guess what they get voice mail!
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
16 Mar 07
I hear you brother!! There have been some instances when I have made an attempt to get to the phone...I have had to run around four little kids and risk injury to get to the phone. It's just silly and not worth running to the phone and risking an injury...especially when it is a non-emergency!!! I am so glad to see that people feel this way too!!
@MarkyB21 (1545)
•
16 Mar 07
People are always saying I don't answer my phone enough too. I don't feel that it's that important - people are usually phoning for a chat rather than anything important.
I don't carry my phone around the house and I won't run to answer the phone but I will call back if someone leaves a message.
1 person likes this
@mckenziemom (522)
• United States
16 Mar 07
I am so glad that other people understand and feel the same way about this topic. I have so much going on in my house just like you prbably do...who wants to spend it on the phone?
@kimberlymarie (203)
• United States
17 Mar 07
I like to screen calls all the time, and I am very much annoyed when someone doesn't bother leaving a message. Even worse is when they wait to hang up AFTER the voice mail/machine picks up, but they don't say anything, so it's a blank message.
Then again, maybe I'm a bit of the pot calling the kettle black! I hate leaving messages. However, I usually do it anyway. If I can do it, they should too!
1 person likes this
@mikesgal4ever1999 (732)
• United States
17 Mar 07
Now with the technology of caller ID and voice mail or answering machines, there is no need to break your neck getting to the phone. I know that a lot of family and friends that call seem to think that just because I am a SAHM that I am ALWAYS there and can answer the phone at ANY time. WRONG ANSWER!!!! And they feel that they don't have to leave a message since I have caller ID. WRONG ANSWER again. I dont' stay tied to the phone and I don't always have free time or hands to answer the phone. My thing is, if its important enough, then a message. If I don't have a message to call back on, then I make the assumption that it is NOT important. Believe me, I hear about it later though and I simply explain, 'Well I didn't think it was important because you didn't leave a message' Sooner or later they will understand.
1 person likes this
@roniroxas (10560)
• Philippines
17 Mar 07
i agree to that....... its not easy to be a full time mom. No sallary and no day off LOL. and in laws or relatives should understand that. house chores and kids is really handfull. specially when you have toodlers to keep an eye. me i sometimes put the ringer on silent (bad girl). well if they cant understand it, it doesnt matter as long as you told them your reason why they have to leave a message.
you are a busy woman they have to understand that.
@sandgroper1 (629)
• Australia
17 Mar 07
We have this problem with my fiance's dad (who is single), he will ring our house if we dont answer he will then ring both of our mobiles until one of them is answered even though we have voice mail and text on all of them. We have tried to tell him if he leaves a message we will call him back but he insists on using up all of his credit on his phone to keep ringing till he gets an answer. We like to sleep in on sundays and because he is up at a sparrow Fa-t he thinks we should be too. I get so angry with him sometimes but he still dosnt get the message. There are some people in this world that just dont get it.
1 person likes this
@retardedrugrat (4791)
• Canada
17 Mar 07
I will not answer my home phone after 2.30pm. My family live in the UK and so with the time difference, they won't call after 2.30pm my time.
My partner always calls me on my cell phone because with our call plan it doesn't cost us a cent.
So if my home phone rings after 2.30pm in the afternoon, I know not to answer it, because it's either a wrong number, or telemarketers and I do not want to be dealing with those right before I go get the kids from School.
1 person likes this
@AngelNicki (412)
• United States
17 Mar 07
I often let my voicemail pick up, especially if the caller ID is a phone number I don't recognize. I don't know why... I just get nervous about answering the phone if I don't know what the call is going to be about, and I'd rather have them leave a message, and then call them back when I know what they're calling about. I'm just a freak that way though! There are certain people, though, that I ALWAYS pick up the phone if possible... like my mom!
1 person likes this
@nikisazombie (22)
• United States
17 Mar 07
No. I would not answer the phone right away if I were busy. I still don't. If I'm in the bath and hear it, or am in the middle of cooking dinner or something, than I don't answer it. Right now, being just my hubby and I, we generally eat in front of the tv. But I still won't answer it then.
I'll call them back or whatever later, though. Noone's got annoyed at me yet, though.
SOMETIMES my phone does'nt even ring! I need to ask my cell company about that...
1 person likes this
