Child Abuse Survivors ?

United States
March 20, 2007 4:03pm CST
My familiy was very abusive. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. Unfortunately, I started spanking my little girl but foudn that I could not control myself - I didn't do anything crazy but it scared me when I found that I could feel the adrenaline running so hard when I spanked her on the bottom. I vowed I would never do it again. My mom and dad used to use the belt, switches, and clothes hangers on us. My dad used to punch me on the arms. It was a sad state of affairs really. I hated them then and we are estranged now. I don't want to ahve a relationship like that with my daughter. I grew up to be a little hard on myself all the time and quite socially inept. Has anyone else been through the horror of abuse? And more to the point, has anyone repeated the cycle? I have put a stop to any and all physical punishment in our house. What are your views on punishing children?
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1 response
susan50
@susan50 (110)
• United States
20 Mar 07
I am not from an abused family but know of some that were. You need to get some counseling for yourself before you do something you will regret. Once you cross that line, there is no going back and your daughter will be the one that suffers. You will need help from a counselor or therapist to help you understand yourself and feelings. I commend you for realizing that you were almost like your parents, that is half the battle. You must have some scars even now from when you were a child. Those scars need to heal before you can have an even better relationship with your daughter.
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michellesmith0
@michellesmith0 (24)
• United States
20 Mar 07
That's precicely what I did. I saw a psychologist for 13 months just to sort through my feelings about what happened to me as a child. Even though I did this, I did not see how "disciplining" a child could be wrong until I had children of my own. I spanked my daughter once when she was 4 1/2 and even though it was just a firm swat on the bottom, it didn't feel right and to describe the way I felt when it happened - whew it just scared me to pieces. I'll never ever do that again! and I haven't since. The abuse has stopped with me.
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