i am an atheist i was brought up an atheist should i bring up my children same?
By glamgrl
@glamgrl (384)
Ireland
23 responses

@Galena (9110)
•
22 Mar 07
why would anyone know, though.
I was raised Pagan, loosely, and was baptised just in case I decided to be a Christian.
and I sort of resent that, although to me it's a meaningless ceremony that holds nothing over me, but I still wish that it hadn't happened.
my mum just thought that seeing as most people are christian, it would be less humiliating if I didn't have to have an adult baptism if I became a Christian
2 people like this

@Fargale (760)
• Brazil
22 Mar 07
I agree with Stacy. (Just this once =P )
Teach them good values, they are independent of religion (and most of them are shared by the major religions anyway). Let them know that several different religions exist in the world, and let them decide for themselves when they are old enough whether they wish to follow one of them or not.

@sororravn (448)
• United States
8 Apr 07
Why would you baptize your children into a eligion that you do not believe in yourself? It would be completely worthless and an empty ritual. Were you baptized as a child?
1 person likes this
@headhunter525 (3548)
• India
2 Apr 07
Let them decide for themselves whether God exists or not as they grow older. Or at least whether theism is more plausible or atheism is more plausible as a worldview. Which one makes more sense to human mind and which one has better explanatory power for the things we observe in the universe.
When one great historian Will Durant says that the question Can Man Live Without God? is the most important question I agree with his observation. The philosophical implication for the two beliefs are so diverse. Of course, even within religions the implication of following one religion over another has far reaching consequences. Religions like Buddhism and Jainism are atheistic, whereas Christianity and Islam are theistic. Hinduism can be atheistic or theistic or pantheistic or panentheistic or polythiestic.
I also feel your children should not be baptised, at least if you meant it by the Christian mode of baptism. Because that will be a mockery of baptism. I don't mean it contemptously, but I wish Christian sacrament of water baptism be respected if you will not mean it as it is supposed to be meant.
1 person likes this
@glamgrl (384)
• Ireland
2 Apr 07
im not a mocking kind of person
i believe in the power of positive thinking(prayer)
i believe in the magic of water
the priest is a very nice person and he seems to understand
it will be profound because i love my child
and i feel it is the right thing to do in the circumstances

@stacyv81 (5903)
• United States
22 Mar 07
Wow, someone else started a topic with the same words, weird...anyway...I will tell you as I told them I think you should let them decide raise them with good morals, good values, teach them common sense, and all a parent teaches their children, and let them research on their own and make their own decision as they are their own people.
1 person likes this
@whywiki (6066)
• Canada
31 Mar 07
I totally agree with you. My parents never forced religion on me. They were anglican, I went to an anglican church first. I didn't like it and left. I had a friend with a dad who was a baptist preacher, I tried that too, not for me. I have friends who are Muslims, I have talked with them at great lengths, not for me either. I have a Roman Catholic Sister in Law. I looked into this religion too. I didn't agree with the teachings. I got to know a bunch of Sikhs too, studied their religion. Not my cup of tea either. After lots of soul searching I have come to the relization that I am an Atheist. I thank my parents for allowing me the freedom to make mt on educated choice when it comes to religion. I just beieve in being a good person and treating others like I would like to be treated.
@Strawberry_chaos (302)
• Australia
31 Mar 07
I don't think you should baptise your children.
I was baptised when i was a baby, and i'm really angry that my parents did that to me! Performing a religious ceremony on me without my consent, and they weren't even chrstian themselves! it was all done to please my grandmother, but i think religious ceremonies are too serious to be done just to avoid upsetting one person.
I think that the best thing to do would be to bring your children up as atheists, and give them a good, unbiased knowledge of various religions. Then when they're older, they can make an informed descision on whether they want to be religious or not.
@Galena (9110)
•
5 Apr 07
exactly.
it's a very serious ceremony, with some very solemn oaths.
the way I feel about Oaths is that you just DON'T take them if you don't mean them with every part of your being.
I would NEVER take an Oath to raise my child as a Christian, as I have no intention of ever keeping an Oath like that.
to me it would be morally wrong to make that Oath without meaning it. you should never just mouth the words and go through with it if you don't beleive it.
quite apart from anything else, to people who do beleive in it, it's quite insulting, as it's playing at something that means a great deal to them.
and if you don't beleive it, why do it.
1 person likes this
@cyntrow (8523)
• United States
2 May 07
I absolutely believe that you should bring your kids up as you feel fit. You should teach them to respect other beliefs and if they choose a different path, you should respect that choice. I am a christian, ie, I follow the teachings of Jesus, but I have done as my parents did for me. I have introduced them to many different faiths and allowed them to make their own choices as far as what faith captures them. If you are an atheist, there is no reason that your children should be baptised. Frankly, that would be a lie. If later in life, they decide that the Christian path calls them, they can get baptised then.
Just teach them respect and, unfortunately, teach them that people will not always respect them. Good luck
@glamgrl (384)
• Ireland
3 May 07
thannks for your response cyntrow
well,it is all academic now because my baby is a catholic now ie i had her baptised.if she chooses to be a lapsed catholic when she is older that is for her to decide.if she asks me what i am i will tell her(but not in any great detail) all the schools here are catholic so i didnt have any choice.
@FrancyDafne (2047)
• Italy
12 Apr 07
I'm a Pagan and when my wife was pregnant I swore that I'd never have sent my son to the Church because I've never been Catholic even if my parents are two fervent Catholics. I fought a lot with my father when I was child because of the religion, but now I'm 40 and I do what I want. So I never spoke to my son about Jesus and Christianity, but when he started going to school, this is the first thing he told me: "Father, I wanna go to church like all my friends". And I answered to him: "Ok, no problem at all, as you know I'll never go to the church, but you are you, not me, so you'll go to church, but you must never ask me to enter a church. I respect you and you respect me". So my son is 7 now and he goes to church every Saturday. I couldn't forbid him to go to church, I'm not like my father who forced me (in truth he tried to force me) to do a thing I didn't want to do.
To me you should leave your child to follow what he/she wants. I am for freedom, freedom is more important than church, atheism, Paganism and so on.
@im_anna (717)
• Philippines
23 Mar 07
i'm just intrigued. when my daughter was born, she was in a life-threatening situation & I relied so much in my faith at that time. I'm not saying your child to be in that situation but what would you do if a life-threatening situation happens, something unexpected happens, you don't pray? you don't have faith? you don't believe in a higher power?


@MarkyB21 (1545)
•
2 May 07
It seems logical to me to bring up your children with your own beliefs but then allow them to make their own decisions as they get older.
Never push atheism on them though as this is something I find distasteful about many of the organised religions where parents constantly tell their children that they must believe certain things (yes I know I'm generalising a bit and will probably get negative ratings for this).
Your children will make their own decisions and I don't think it should be forced on them by either you or the society in which you live. If you have them baptised but the see that you are an atheist it could cause unnecessary confusion.

@glamgrl (384)
• Ireland
5 May 07
at least she wont have to be politically correct as i felt i had to be she can say it is rubbish if she wishes because she will be nominally in the catholic 'club'.i felt being the only atheist robbed me of my voice.i was ALONE.it is crazy there are so few self proclaimed atheists.people here were such peasants that they associated godlessness with the devil.i felt like lady macbeth washing her hands-ironically!ie like the whole original sin thing ha ha .thanks for reply marky!

@Tripod (105)
• Philippines
1 Apr 07
I think you've gotten great responses so far. In a few years I will be faced with the same decision and I've decided on what to do many years ago. My children will definitely make their own choices, but as a child I would be forced to baptize them due to the demands of my family. Put it this way, you are an atheist, if your child is baptized or not, it will not affect the way you perceive your beliefs. It just really shouldn't matter to you, just do it for the likes of your family.
@glamgrl (384)
• Ireland
1 Apr 07
yes i agree totally. it is only a piece of paper. why should i make my childs life difficult for the sake of a piece of paper!i will still be an atheist and probably so will she.we are not born into a vacume ,that is life there is no black and white if more people compromised fundamentalism would not exist-well i am rambling now
@hello_cancer (183)
• United States
22 Mar 07
personally, i feel that you should let your children choose whether or not they want to be religious, and what religion they choose to follow. you could expose them to little facets of many different religions, or just let them expose themselves to what they are interested in, but i think that in the end the choice should be the childs.
1 person likes this
@sera21 (30)
• India
24 Mar 07
dear glam:)
thanx for adding me in your friends!I don't see why should you baptize your children when you don't believe in such rituals..you can pass your belief to your kids and let them decide what they want to practice a religious life or an atheist life.
....yours
sera
@iiartisanii (254)
• United States
27 Apr 07
Why wouldn't you bring up your children in your belief (or lack of) system? People do it all the time. . albeit they have the opposite beleifs.
Children have a knack for growing up and deciding things for themselves. If they want to be baptized, they'll get baptized. If they want to be atheist, they'll do that too.
Why not bring up the children in a secular environment and let them decide for themselves? If only every family did that. .
@edujccz (929)
• Philippines
7 May 07
I am a christian but i will not advise you to go and baptized your children, it will be the more that you will hate christianity, in doing so, you will be denied unless you yourself go for baptism itself, maybe , you will also be denied because you dont believe in God and if still you do it , it will become useless. Life to be a christian is not easy, it is not a title and it is not a piece of paper only. It is a life of sacrifice in the belief of a God who ask you to love his son Jesus, He will ask you to love your neighbor as you love yourself, He will ask you to share with the poor, He will ask you to love your enemy. So many things else that is hard to do and He tells you never to complain, all things that is impossible to do. Dont do it , for he said, many are called but few are chosen'''''
@funnycole (392)
• United States
6 May 07
I think that children do look to their parents for guidance and the guidance we give them helps create in them a valid identity. Religion gives people traditions to follow. I think if you choose to give your children a religious based upbringing then you are choosing to place a religion into their identity. Even the previous posts whether or not they chose to follow the religion of their parents identified with it.
@Fargale (760)
• Brazil
22 Mar 07
Coolchai, religions can be guides through life (for better or for worse, depending on the specific religion and aspect of the religion that we're talking about), but they are not the only one. It is perfectly possible for someone to be a completely moral and benevolent member of society without following any religion at all.
2 people like this
@michele_villasenor (624)
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
I think you should expose them to various religious groups so that he may decide for themselves eventually. I don't suggest that you have them baptized if you yourself are not baptized. My reason for saying this is that you cannot teach them about spirituality anyway so there's no sense in having them baptized when you cannot teach them about the religion you would be having them join, not to mention the beliefs and practices it entails. This might cause confusion especially for the younger ones. Or if you ever decide to have them baptized make sure that there will be someone to guide them to live in accordance to what the religion teaches and practices. Also, the earlier they are exposed the better. This way they will grow up, hopefully, with the faith that they will need in order to deal with life with proper guidance and direction.
@gbaben (509)
• Russian Federation
24 Mar 07
One thing i want you to understand is that,your children can not be get baptized by you,nor can they be baptized without knowing what they are doing.Firstly,you as a father,you are an athies,do you really know what baptism is all about?If you do then you will be the first to do it before your children,I think.The bible said "you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free".
@nbtalle (40)
• Singapore
7 Jun 07
I was baptized when I was a baby in a Roman Catholic church. But I got baptized again when I was 29 years old when I became a true believer of Jesus Christ. I did not undergo baptism until I have understood its significance.
Should your children be baptized? How old are they? If they can already decide by themselves, let them decide. But if not, then you have to decide for them.
But I pray that one day, you and your children will finally know Jesus Christ because He is the way, the truth and life.
