How can people give up family pets?
By bonbon664
@bonbon664 (3466)
Canada
March 26, 2007 2:46am CST
I read classified ads over and over that describe pets that people don't have time for anymore, so, they're just going to give them away. How can people do this? I wish people would realize that a pet is a long commitment. They're a lot of work, and all it takes is a little bit of research to understand this before you get one.
Read the following without a tear coming to your eye....I dare you!
A man in Grand Rapids, Michigan incredibly took out a US $7,000 full page ad in the paper to present the "HOW COULD YOU?" By Jim Willis, 2001. A man Copyright Jim Willis 2001, all rights reserved
When I was a puppy I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?"
- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub.
My housetraining took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed, listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect. We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs," you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.
Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love.
She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" - still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy. Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love."
As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch - because your touch was now so infrequent - and I would have defended them with my life if need be.
I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams. Together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway. There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf.
Now you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family.
I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog or cat, even one with "papers." You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar as he screamed "No, Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life. You gave me a goodbye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too.
After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked "How could you?"
They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you - that you had changed your mind - that this was all a bad dream...or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me. When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited.
I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table, rubbed my ears and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood.
She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured "How could you?"
Perhaps because she understood my dog speak, she said "I'm so sorry." She hugged me and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself - a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place. With my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not meant for her. It was you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of. I will think of you and wait for you forever.
May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.
If "How Could You?" brought tears to your eyes as you read it, as it did to mine as I wrote it, it is because it is the composite story of the millions of formerly owned pets who die each year in American and Canadian animal shelters. Anyone is welcome to distribute the essay for a non commercial purpose, as long as it is properly attributed with the copyright notice.
Please use it to help educate, on your websites, in newspapers, on animal shelter and vet office bulletin boards. Tell the public that the decision to add a pet to the family is an important one for life, that animals deserve our love and sensible care, that finding another appropriate home for your animal is your responsibility and any local humane society or animal welfare league can offer you good advice, and that all life is precious. Please do your part to STOP the killing, and encourage all spay and neuter campaigns in order to prevent unwanted animals.
Jim Willis the story.
The End
7 people like this
21 responses
@magikrose (5429)
• United States
27 Mar 07
I am a MAJOR pet lover. In my life time I have had dogs, cats, birds and fish. The only time we ever got rod of an animal is because of old age and putting to sleep was helping the animal so they didnt suffer any more.
I currently have 2 adorable almost 7month old kittens. They are WAY more than just pets or play things for my kids. They ARE my kids along with my birth kids and sometimes I think I spoile my fur babies more then my kids.
Considering that I have 1 male and 1 female my husband and I decided to get them fixed to avoid a preganacy and having kittens that we cant take care of. State there is a Vet the has a fully equipted mini bus and he traveles arround my state and sterailses cats. You have to call and see when they are going to be near your town and it only cost me $67 per cat. That included general exam, gettingthem fixed, shots and nail trim if needed.
I was very nervous for them. I had to drop off my cats early in the morning and I had to wait all day before I could pick them up. When I picked them up they gave me care instructions, mentoned I had to change there food dish cause they had feline acne, and I had to de-worm them cause they were realy skinny.
Now that all of that is taken care of and I eve nstarted buying them indoor cat food since my cats are indoor cats they are so happy and healthy that I can help but be happy with them.
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
27 Mar 07
That just broke my heart reading this! My new family member is Miko and he is a Shiba Inu. My girlfriend had to move in with her mom and she was not allowed to have dogs in the house there, so she looked high and low for a family for him. He is an older fellow and we used to watch him on weekends sometimes. We fell in love with him just on the visits, but he stole our hearts. We do treat him like a member of the family, pets should be treated that way. He even gets Christmas gifts! They love you and trust you implicitly and depend on you to love them back. They deserve it! They bring such happiness into your life and your kids lives. It is a shame when people treat them like they are an after thought!
1 person likes this
@kataztrophy (1836)
• United States
26 Mar 07
If Someone is unsuitable who it comes to having a pet(lack of time to care for it for example) it is better to give the animal to someone who can care for it rather than keeping it and neglecting the poor thing.
Look it from the animals perspective. If your owner was abusive to you, would you rather be sent to a shelter or stay and receive harm?At least then you would have a chance at a better life. there are a number of different situations were a change in scenery would be better for the animal.
@kataztrophy (1836)
• United States
1 Apr 07
that is very true, but there are people who really don't know how to properly care for a pet doing that everywhere. Its like others have said, for whatever reason neglect can be a factor in which the shelter may be a better situation.
If I had the space, money and time to devote to it, I would adopt a tone of animals to prevent them from being put to rest.
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
26 Mar 07
Speaking as a pet owner myself, I have four cats who I love dearly and they are more than animals to me, they are part of my family, they are family members, they give me so much love, joy and companionship. Reading this was awful and I can't believe there are people out there who'd do this to animals. An animal is for life not just for Christmas, which is so, so true! They are a full time commitment not just a toy which you can throw away when you are tired of it!
@bonbon664 (3466)
• Canada
26 Mar 07
I never said they were family members, however what I did say was that I thought it was incredibly irresponsible to give up a pet for purely selfish reasons.
2 people like this
@Galena (9110)
•
26 Mar 07
people SHOULD feel bad if they give up a pet just because they can't be bothered anymore.
animals put their trust in you completely.
to get rid of them just because you're bored of them, like you would a car you didn't want anymore, is a gross betrayal of that trust.
@Melizzy (1381)
• United States
27 Mar 07
Judyt00, get real. It's not about making people feel badly. It's about RESPONSIBILITY. You take on a pet, it's a responsibility. Do you just shirk your responsibilities? And yeah, ONLY in America. You are from Canada, that great bastion of....hockey, snow and socialized health care that takes months to get into a simple doctor's appointment. How's the grandson, by the way? Let me know when he crosses the border and gets help ONLY IN AMERICA.
@seamonkey (1976)
• Ireland
10 Apr 07
I wish I could give you rmore than one postive rating for sharing this. I have seen it before as I do dog fostering, and those dogs are exactly what you describe, the ones that would be getting the tourniquet later that day if we weren't getting them out, placing them in foster homes like mine, and then getting them ready to go on to the right, last permanent home.
I hate the bleepedy bleeps that can be so heartless. They know what is going to happen to that animal, and sometimes the people on the desk when they are being turned into the pound will be very forthright, saying things like, 'the pound is full. your dog WILL be put down on Tuesday' or whatever. They just don't care.
@bonbon664 (3466)
• Canada
12 Apr 07
Yeah, I feel the same, I do rescue as well, and the most common excuse we get for dogs in rescue is that the people are too busy for them.
@loujac3 (1188)
• United States
27 Mar 07
My biggest fear is that I will end up homeless or ill and not be able to take care of my best friend. He deserves so much for what he has done for me. I have informed my daughters that if anything happens to me to please find a good home for my dog and cat. I love them so deeply that as I sit here and type this response I am crying. I pray that God watches over us so that I never have to give up my pets.
I lost my job about 10 days ago and I have been worried sick about how I will get through this rough time. Please pray for us!
@7nicole1 (1633)
• Canada
27 Mar 07
Oh god thats sad I couldnt even finish reading it. I dont know how people do this either, a dog or cat gives its self to you 100%. No mmatter how mad you get at them or how long you forget about them they are always there showing their love. I have 2 dogs and I could never get rid of neither of them. Although one of them is a big handful I would never get rid of her.
@Pigglies (9329)
• United States
27 Mar 07
This story makes me cry every time, even though I have read it many times now.
What makes me cry even more though, is watching it take place. Kids crying as their parents dump the family pet at the shelter, people being lazy and not bothering to rehome their pets on their own, etc.
I can somewhat understand that for certain reasons, people might have to rehome their pet. What I don't get though, is how people don't even try to find a home, screen the new owners, etc. Instead, they just dump the pet and rid themselves of the responsibility.
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
27 Mar 07
That broke my heart. I have a weakness for dogs anyway. I have 4 and I have a hard time just telling them they can't come into the bedroom at night sometimes. I can't stand to see someone mistreat an animal. If a person decided to get a pet then they assume the responsibility to care for it. Thanks for the reminder.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Mar 07
Most of the time i would agree with you. But there was a time in my life, I had to choose my pet or a place to live. My family couldn't afford our house payments because i had lost my job. I had a dog and two cats. three boys and a hubby. he still had his job but our house payment suffered. We ended up getting thrown out with no place to live. We found a mobile home park that had a mobile home for sale. We could make payments and they were right for us. The one stipulation was we couldn't have pets. I had less than a week to find homes for my animals. I HATED giving them up. It really hurt. But I had no choice. I was lucky enough to find great homes for all of them. The people who took them told us if we ever got to where we could have them again, then we could have them back. We still visit our pets and keep in touch. But they are no longer ours. So some times there are situations when people have no choice in the matter.
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
27 Mar 07
I understand what you mean. I think that the writer of that commentary was meaning that people often times don't take the time to find caring homes for their pets and just hand them off to the animal shelter or even worse leave them on the side of the road somewhere. My father did that to a pet of ours when we were a children because they didn't have a shelter for pets back then, we lived in a very rural area. My brother and I were heart broken and it hurt us to no end. I thought my dad was the most heartless man on the planet at that time. I still dislike the fact that he did that. In your case, you made sure your pets were well taken care of with new families and you still keep in contact and visit them. You did the right thing!
@silvermoonmyst (943)
• United States
26 Mar 07
That is aweful. I mean really terrible.
Im so thankful that we have a no kill policy at the shelters in my area for one. Because ive had to give up pets before. And it is a heart wrenching aweful desision that i had to make.
@bonbon664 (3466)
• Canada
26 Mar 07
Unfortunately, healthy animals are euthanized all the time. It's sad.
@reipowerhouse (428)
• United States
27 Mar 07
Personally I believe that people change and pets have been put on this earth to satisfy us not to become our children.
I think that at some time or another it may come down to it where a pet is no longer in a home because the people no longer have time to take care of them the way they need or they need to move for family reasons.
A pet is a pet it's not a family member and I don't think anyone should think of them as human because they're not. If a dog or cat was so great then they would be able to talk our language or use the toilet like civilized human beings do but since they can't they should never be considered equal to what a human can do.
Just as dogs are used to help the blind, used to assist in rounding up cattle and used to pull sleds and such. Animals were put on this earth to help humans not be a part of them.
I love animals don't get me wrong however they are animals and just as the bible says, if an animal is to bite a human it is to be killed.
Just as I have recently given away my dog because I don't have the space or time, I did my job and found him a good home with someone that is willing to put the extra effort in that I can no longer do.
@advicegirl (95)
• United States
27 Mar 07
Thank you for posting this discussion. I've been a pet lover for many years and could not fathom turning my back on a pet that loves me and depends on me for their well being. I feel too many people adopt or buy pets thinking of them as a toy or accessory, when they should be viewed as seriously as they would adopting a child.
People may come and go from your life but a pet's love is unconditional. I admire and respect the people out there who take having a pet seriously and who allow their love to enter their lives. It is a precious gift and yes, I do agree that they become parts of the family.
Sincerely,
Zuri
http://askzuri.blogspot.com
@KrisNY (7590)
• United States
27 Mar 07
This is great advice-- so many people get pets for their kids-- and then their kids get tired of them.. and the parents get stick taking care of them-- I think also of them decide to give them away.
Heck I would never do this- I love animals-- the only way I'd give one away is for safety reasons-- Not good with kids, etc.
Having pets is a huge committment- I just adopted a cat from The Lollypop Farm (Humane society) in Rochester, NY.. They give out numerous handouts and talk to you about making sure you find the perfect pet-- how much time it takes to own a pet, etc.
We have 2 dogs and 1 cat-- I wouldn't give them up for anything!
@winky73 (1404)
• United States
26 Mar 07
I have two stray puppies right now.....which I could have send to the shelter....but I didn't....because I know they have feelings too.
It always upsets me when people just leave their pets....like they are not needed anymore.
To me taking in a animal is like having a child....they rely on you for food,shelter,love and care and if you can't make the commitment to give those things to them until the end.....then maybe you should not get them in the first place.
I have never send on of my pets to the shelter....but I have had dogs that I needed to find new homes for.The hardest one was Peanut....my little Rat Terrier that I had years ago.
I had found her a new home with people that I knew would take good care of her....but when the day came and they loaded her in the car and started to drive away....I will never forget the way she looked out through the back window.There was so much sadness in those little eyes and I knew that she did not understand why she had to leave.
They may not be able to use words to tell us how they feel....but if you take a moment to really look....they will speak volumes.
So yes....this story made me cry....because so many people don't take the time to really look and listen.
@Galena (9110)
•
26 Mar 07
the most heartbreaking one I've seen was along the lines of
12yo dog.
free to good home, through no fault of his own, only as he doesn't get on with new puppy.
I mean what a betrayal of that old friend. if they really can't get on, then surely the puppy has to go. they're young enough to be happy in a new family, and easy to rehome.
@scarlet_woman (23463)
• United States
26 Mar 07
i've never understood that myself.a pet is responsibility
to me,just like a kid.i would never abandon them.i've saved many animals who were dumped by summer renters up here.
i had a boyfriend who tried to have me get rid of a pet i'd had before him.guess who hit the curb?
wasn't the cat :)=)
@KissThis (3003)
• United States
27 Mar 07
I commend this man for an excellant article. It brought tears to my eyes.
When you take on an animal as a pet and companion its surpose to be for life.Not just till you find something you like better. To throw a pet away as if its nothing is cruel.