child abuse
By antgillon
@antgillon (11)
October 18, 2006 9:53am CST
was raped at the age of 12 repedatly .been a heavy smoker of pot since the age of sixteen and played with many other drugs in my time .now 38 went to the police this year but not enough evidence to prosecute .stopped smoking pot in the last month .now finding life difficult .finding a lot ov anger coming up .finding it difficult to work and interacting is more difficult than befoer .think i shood try counceling
2 people like this
13 responses
@neyna20 (33)
• United States
18 Oct 06
counseling could help you but i have found out in my own experience you have to really want a different life before you can have it. there is big difference in needing to change it and wanting to. if you dont want to then yes it will be extremely hard.
@antgillon (11)
•
18 Oct 06
well mr delta ive been keeping an eye on bill the bugger for an awfull lonngtime i told him a long time ago if i ever suspected him ov any such act in the future iwood shop him so at the start ov the year i poped up to the allotments and to my horror he had a young soul there helping with the animals great for attracting kids .i immediatly plled the lad to one side and asked him if b b had touched him the lad siad no but he was unlikely to admit this to a stranger i continue in a minute
@antgillon (11)
•
18 Oct 06
well after a few days mulling this situation i decided to purchase a top ov the range dictaphone and go back to visit b b i quized him about the boy he denied all then i talked about what he had done to me he admited all and appologised blah blah it was all on the tape so i went to visit the police which wasnt esay as i had a lot of involvement with them as a teenager .they seemed very chuffed with the tape they said it wasnt entrapment cus he had spoken himself without any pressurecontinue in min
@antgillon (11)
•
18 Oct 06
i wood just like to say every situation is different but when somthing like this happens to a young child or an adult but i wood say worse for a child because they dont no there own mind .it causes untold sycological damage .for instance pissing in pub toilets cant do if enougher male comes in i can now but upto late 20,s one simple exe.i went crazy in my teens ended up in prison in a matow enviro n you aint gone admit anyting then
@dmacdonald111 (530)
•
19 Oct 06
I was also raped. Between the ages of 11 and 16 (constantly). I know exactly how you feel. I'm only 29, but councelling is your best option. They will listen and help with your problems. I've only just started going to a councellor myself and although it's early days yet, I already feel that it's going to be of help. Definately do it. IF you have been to the police, speaking to a councellor or doctor will be easier for you. Good luck - dmacdonald111 @ btinternet . com
@dmacdonald111 (530)
•
19 Oct 06
Thanks guys :) I actually live in a quiet town and not a big city or anything, but it's something I've come to learn to live with. It's nice people out there are supportive as well. I hope antgillon finds the help they need.
giftsandbagscom - I know. I met someone years after it happened who had the same thing. Then I found out it was the same person!
@marciascott (25529)
• United States
19 Oct 06
I'm sorry to hear that. Life goes on keep yourself busy, stay away from people that smoke pot. what is your hobby. maybe you do need counseling at least your admitting it. do you pray? pray about it.
@antgillon (11)
•
18 Oct 06
thats easily said but when you,ve held a secret for 26 years and the guilt of holding the secret it,s not somthing you can drop in 5 mins but yeah hopfully i will let it go .if i learnt anything from this its that i shood have let this out a long time ago thats the price ya pay for being loyal n protecting the people arond ya my advice to any one else wood be to tell somone dont do what ive done and let it tare you apart and put others at risk
@Deltaseccc (505)
• Namibia
18 Oct 06
No - its not something you can drop like that, but you must make a start in cutting loose.
About protecting the others? You are NOT resposible for his actions - he is and must deal with his own actions and guilt. As I've said before - You are resp. for YOU and you alone. As long as you protect this person - you are taking the blame for his actions on yourself. Give it back to him to deal with. Why punish yourself for something someone else did?
Lift up your head and face yourself and world. You ARE not guilty of anything, you were the victim. Now it is up to you to decide - Am I going to stay a victim for ever or am I going to become a survivor...
@classicaljazz (1628)
• United States
19 Oct 06
Yes counseling will be good for you. Also if you are a believer, prayer will help get you through. Also keep a journal and go ahead and get it all out. This will also help you see your porgress. You can overcome!
@xbrendax (2662)
• United States
18 Oct 06
I feel so sad for you. You should have had counceling right after the rape occured. This is something that will stay with you for ever, you can never forget it but counceling will make you learn to live with these memories and not let them destroy your life! You did nothing wrong and you deserve a good life! Seek counceling as soon as possable please! I know what I am talking about, for I too was raped at a very young age!!!!!
@snakelady91 (463)
• United States
18 Oct 06
I would definitely recommend counseling. As a rape survivor myself, it is almost impossible to get over being raped until you are comfortable talking about it and you stop unconsciously blaming yourself for either letting it happen, or just for not being able to stop it. I wrote a poem about how I felt, and putting it out on the web started the healing process for me.
@juls146 (963)
• India
18 Oct 06
i am really sad for you..counceling might help but sometimes or some people it wont work...'cox our feeling how much ever we try to express to a new person, they wont understand us...from my experience most of the time..wat am expressing abt a problem and the counselor taking it is diffrent and the solution is of no use...but in ur case i think we can meet up with the people who have experiende the same situation and share ur hurts with them..may not help tat much..but still u can try...and discuss wat needs to be done next...start a new business..go for outing..long drives...few pegs..new places..new people..and slowly i think things would become better than now..but never stay away from people..u should communicate with them,,know wat s happening around,..otherwise u will just think abt ur past n be sad...interaction ,,,communication,,,outing,,,helps a lot for me to forget the past,,,tak care stay in touch..
@dollar669 (569)
• Canada
18 Oct 06
Absolutly try councling or therapy, Waht happened to you is Unfourtunatly common, and you SO not alone. Talkign it out this a pro can help you see more light in your tomorrow
@FensterKarton (34)
• United States
18 Oct 06
Absolutely. Many problems are made tolerable with skilled help.
If there is a good hypnotherapist in your area you might give them a try. I think they are faster than conventional dialog therapy.
@aureliaz (1177)
• Singapore
19 Oct 06
I can't say I've been through all that nor can I say that I know how you feel, but I do think that counselling is your best option. A professional can really help you out in ways that noone else can. I'm glad that you stopped the pot...persevere through it and I sincerely believe your life will take a turn for the better. All the best.
