my husband loves our daughter more than me

Talk to him about how you feel. The baby is just 10 months old and you need to discuss how you feel with your husband. Don't let this feeling go intense coz it is not too late to be having post partum depression. If this is first child for both of you, I guess your husband is just awe by the miracle you created together. Babies are so hard to resist. So, talk to him because you are able to...the baby can't understand your thoughts or the attention of your husband to her.

My husband and I were also one on one for five years with my husband and now we have a four month old baby. He loves out baby so much and he also pays more attention with my child than me. I am like you sometimes I also got jealous and I am asking if I am righteous with my feelings. But later I realize that maybe my husband just like to have his attention to my child and I know he still love me. He will later pay his attention to me. I just have to wait.

Honestly? You're being a little unreasonable. Your husband has been seeing you for 9 years. He has only seen your daughter for 10 months. Do you really think it would be fair to him? And don't get your hopes up about him devoting tons of his time for either of you. Why? Because he'll be working 24/7 to make sure you both have a good life, with or without him. Just get over this temporary fear and focus on the big picture. As long as he comes home at the end, it doesn't matter who he plays with. He's here, isn't he?

i think you better talk to your husband...explain your feelings about what happening to you so that he can understand you...

I don't think he loves your daughter more than you. I am sure he loves you both equally but in different ways. You must talk to him about this. I know your not jealous, but you are feeling left out. Tell him you need time with him as a husband. But be happy that he loves to spend time with your child. Some men don't care to spend time with their kids. I am sure he is just happy because this is your first child and it is exciting for him! So, when you can, ask him if you can talk with him about this. I am sure he will be understanding and try to make time for you. Why not sit down with him and the baby and play together too? This way you can feel together as a family, but still tell him you need time with him as a husband. Good luck, and keep us posted on how this goes!

i understand how u feel because i have a 4 month old son and my hubby is always playing with him.LOL . Men express their feel of being responsible in this manner. We moms be with our child the most, because they need us the most but in the other hand a fathers love is the same important.talk to him and tell him how you fell and work out something.

For a husband the love for his wife and the love for his daughter are 2 different kinds of love. Then attention is another thing. It's nothing wrong if he pays attention to the baby more than he pays to you. It's obvious that the baby needs more attention than you and probably your husband has my same view! The love he has for you is still there, intact and never changed. Let's just say it's the woman's mind that plays the trick. We are constantly looking for attention from our husbands. I am married and have no children, but still my husband's attention isn't the same as it used to be. I think it's just normal. Can you immagine what life would be like if we always did and said the same thing day after day?

I'm really surprised to read your sentiment. I hear stories about husbands feeling left out and not having enough attention from their wives because they concentrate more on their children. But a wife feeling the same way, it's really new to me. Anyways, babies are bundle of joys in a real sense of the word. Aside from being fragile and helpless, we enjoy them too much and give them lots of time and attention. I'm sure that your husband loves you more now, as you have given him a great gift, and that is your daughter. You should not feel that you are in some kind of competition with your daughter for your husband's attention. Maybe he just likes to savor this stage of being a father. As men get busy with work, I'm sure there will come a time that he will have less time for your daughter. Let him feel and explore the joys of fatherhood while he can. You are very lucky as some children don't have fathers to look after them. As a wife and mother, you should be the first to understand. Tell your husband how you feel, but be sure to tell him that you also understand that he wants to enjoy his time with your daughter. Give him a chance to explain his side and you might be even surprised with what he will say.

I think it is only natural for your husband to have this feelings for your daughter. You still have to be thankful because some of fathers right now are not hands on and they just let their wives do all the baby stuff. Aren't you the same as your husband right now? Aren't you focused to your baby than to your husband now? Because when I first had a baby almost all my attention were given to her instead of my husband. But things changed and that was never a problem to us because our children always comes first in our relationship.

I think its just normal, try to work things out. Kids generally need more attention then the adults. Funny that you feel this way, cos most of the time, its the guys who feel this way. I'm sure your man loves you even more, after giving the two of you such a lovable daughter.

i remember when i was 11 years old...i saw my mom jealous of me because when my dad went for a seminar, he kissed me goodbye and talked to me anything...i am the only girl at that time...and i saw my mom, i felt it...that she was jealous because my dad talked to me more than her... i believe in sayings that girls are closer to their father and boys are closer to their mother...because everytime i am with my dad, i feel more secure and safe...but i share my secrets to my mom...don't misinterpret me, i love them both... well about your problem, it is normal that you feel like that because it is your first child...maybe he sometimes felt like that too if u are taking care of your baby because my brother is like that also...

I think that it is jsut an adjustment for you because before you got all his time and now you have to share it with your daughter too. I have kids too and never did I feel this way, the more I seen my kids interact and play with their dad the happier it made me. Id much rather have them spending time with him then me, they are only little once and that daddy role needs to be put in tact at a young age. Hang in there, it will be easier for you soon.

I think you might be suffering from a case of post partum depression. If you are aware of it, the depression will have less power over you and will pass sooner.

I have 2 daughters and a wife. I pay a lot of attention to my oldest and not much to my youngest. My wife says i give her none at all. Ironic that you should have this message posted when i just signed in with my lot about 20 minutes ago. Let me explain why i am the way i am before you pass judgement on what i just said about how i treat each different. I have been married 11 years. And will probably have the same wife for the next 50 years. Me and my youngest don't have much in common and don't really communicate. Me and my oldest talk about alot of different subjects and debate on a lot of different issues. My youngest won't stand up to me on her beliefs were my oldest will. The youngest will bottle what she feels and hide. This makes raising the oldest better because i get a different yet sometimes very immature point of view about things from her. Which in turn helps me to remember what i felt 25 years ago when i was close to her age. In easier form of wording, it helps me to be young again. As for my wife, we only have kids for so many years before they leave. We should enjoy them now, then we will appreciate each other a little more when we get older. I guess what i am trying to say is, don't stand back and get jealous over your child. Join the 2 of them in play and enjoy the life you have together as a hole. When your child moves out and goes to college, you'll have plenty of time to be the closest couple that you have ever imagined.

You should be happy your husband loves your daughter and wants to spend time with her. I understand how you may be feeling but be happy he is so loving. You could just tell him that you need attention too..and not to forget about you...

Well of course he loves his daughter more than you! I love my kids more than I love my husband! That's just natural. I think you could of worded this differently but I understand that you are just feeling neglected. Try putting the baby to bed around 6-7pm one night and having some time to yourselves. Or maybe find a sitter and go out for dinner or something. Or do something with him and the baby so you both are getting attention. Good Luck!

I don't think that you're being unreasonable, Shalumanu, by desiring you husband's attention. You and your husband are partners and should be commited to each other. When you said your vows you promised to love and honor one another. And honor means to highly esteem some one. You should let your mate know in a tender way that you would like to have more attention from him and let him know how you feel about it. Tell him that you highly esteem him and would like to share time and opinions with him. Don't be whining and nagging because it tends to turn one off.

I guess you need your feeling be known to your husband..go talk to him and tell him how you feel with sudden shift of attention from you to your daughter..well, I would say maybe your husband was just very happy getting a new baby, especially if she is your first child..is she? and yeah, it could be that he would also think that you're happy seeing him enjoying his fatherhood and taking good care to your daughter. but the bottom line is, talk to your husband and make him understand how you're feelings before it's too late.

It can be hard to adjust from being a couple to being parents. I think you should try to tell yourself that you would rather have a man who loved his child and wanted to spend time with her. lots of women end up with men who, as soon as the babies come along, find that anything that takes them away from the home is more preferable to being at home. Believe me more women would want to be in your shoes than you can ever imagine. Try to use the time he spends with the baby to catch up with some 'me time'. Have the long soak in the bath, take a nap, visit a friend, all the things that become hard to do with a baby. In a few months you won't get a chance to sit still when you look after her and you will look forward to your husband spending time with her just to give you a break, honest!

yeah husband/wife relationships are complex father/daughter ones are not thats the difference