My baby die today!!!

I am so sorry you have lost your baby. I can't believe that your wife did that without talking to you first that is so unfeeling. It doesn't sound like your wife is old enough or mature enough to be married let alone have a baby. why does she listen to her family when she has a husband who obviously loves her, that's not right. I think maybe you need to find yourself a more mature wife that is your equal. I know that doesn't sound a very nice thing to say but I can't see you being happy if you stay with her. It is not going to work out with her of her family so best that you cut the ties with them all and find yourself someone who will love you for who you are.

You are doing the right thing by talking about it. Communication is a big part of a relationship. I gather, from what you said that the communication between you and your girl isn't there. It is easy to understand your frustration. Did you not have any say in the final outcome? If the parents don't like you there are all ready 2 strikes against you. Your girl will constantly be torn between you and them. You should both seek counseling before you decide whether this relationship can continue. Maybe she needs to grow up some more.

i am sorry to hear this friend. i suggest you get a divorce and leave this woman now. it is obvious she doesnt want to start a family with you and why she never asked you makes me think? do what is best for you and good luck in your life and the future

I am sorry for your loss. If your wife feels that way about an unborn child to destroy it she does not have very many good things going on in her life. I would suggest you get out of there as fast as you can. I would not want to spend my life with a murderer. She obviously has very poor nurturing skills and your relationship don't mean squat to her. Again I am very sorry for your loss. Good luck with your future.

i can not believe that your wife did that with out talking to you. she needs to learn that her family which is you first and not her parents. if i where you i would leave her today. she killed a piece of you and it seems like she did not care so why should you care on how she feels if you left her. stay strong and you will found the right girl that does want to have your baby and does not worry on what her parents say.

I would have to say that it was pretty callous of her to do that without first talking with you. It seems as if she may not be grown up enough in herself yet to be able to make her own decisions. You should have been concerned about things when she failed to tell her family she had married you, and as such you should have avioded procreation until things were more normal. Now it is up to you what happens, can you live and forgive what has happened or will you carry the hurt forever. If you can't forgive then it is best to leave this relationship. If you can't forgive ccompletely leave her, because your actions will always be clouded by this incident. I'm sorry and hope things turn out well for....

that means that she did not love you that much then...try to talk to her first about your situation and try to ask again if she really loves you, and you want a child from her and the likes...before deciding anything..

My heart goes out to you, jimfabo. I pray for both you and your lost baby, and also for your wife, so that she may come to her senses. I do not mean to put my nose where it is not wanted, but it seems to me that your relationship is very one sided. From what you wrote, it seems to me your wife values her parents more than you, her husband. In the Bible, there is a passage that when a man and a woman become as one, they will only cleave to each other, not to their parents or other people. Maybe your wife is not ready to follow that biblical injunction. It is very strange that your wife did not consult you regarding the MTR, because that baby is part of you too, not just hers. Do you have any access to marriage counselling? Would your wife be willing to go with you to counselling? Maybe that will help both you (and your wife) to heal from this loss. Maybe that will help you understand why she went and did this without telling you. If you love each other, it may open up a lot more insights on why she did it, and why she listens more to her parents than to you. There certainly seems to be some priorities that need shifting here. Be strong...

OMG! seems like you got married to a wrong woman. how can anyone in this world go for an abortion just because she is not sure about her life, her future? i'm sorry to say this but i think that she is a nutcase and you better keep yourself aloof from women like her. i think u deserve a better wife than her...better life than this. go, dump your fickle-head and immature wife NOW!

I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear this. It's true that sometimes if a woman gets disappointed by a man, she would decide not to carry his baby. but this decision should be made before she has the baby, so it's not considered killing since there is nothing to kill. I can't blame her family since they don't like you in the beginning anyway, but for your wife to marry you then carried your baby only to destroy it, is way out of line. If I were you, I would get a divorce. Talk to a lawyer, find out if you can sue her for what she did to the baby or at least make sure your wife won't get any settlement whatsoever after divorce. You really can't risk having another relationship with this person, if she can take your baby's life, she can do it with other living beings.

That is terrible. How could she do that. How could she not want a baby. They are the most precious gift to anyone. I don't know if I could look her in the face at all after doing that. It should of been a two way decision. You have to keep on living and go on with your life. I don't know if it should be with your wife. There is always the perfect person out there for someone and should be another one for you. You are going to hurt for sometime but you will go on and find what fills that void in life. Good luck to you.

Oh,i feel very sorry for what you have said.And i understand your feeling. I think you should let your in-law accept you first before you and your wife prepare to have a baby.If they can't accept you,how do you know they accept your baby?Do you really want your baby in the same boat with you.I suggest you talk to your wife peacefully.Ask her does she really love you,if she will always listen to her parents.I think this kind of marriage can not last for long.And before you decide to have a baby,what you should do first is to prepare a happy family for the baby,am i right?Do not let your baby to be another sad person.

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss but I guess this is the right time for you to decide. I hope you don't mind me giving you some advice. I think that you should end up with this girl. Don't get me wrong though I'm saying this fully aware of the situation that you have mentioned. For a relationship to work any decisions should be made in accordance with each other. The mere fact that your wife favors her family more than you just means that she doesn't love you as much as you thought she did. Once a person gets married he/she should forget his/her family and support the partner she had chosen. In your situation though sad to say she loves her family more than you which is not worthwhile. Most especially the fact that she did MTR is more of a fact that she really doesn't love you at all. Because if she did she wouldn't do that because it's your baby and hers. I hope that I have somehow enlightened you. Feel free to send me messages if needed. There is a better future ahead of you.

I think when it comes down to it, it is her decision whether or not to have the child. After all, it doesn't come out of your body. BUT--this is incredible callous and cold. She didn't even tell you she was going to do it? i don't think I could do this to someone I love without at least first discussing it with them. her feelings for you may not be as strong as you think. And, it is a shame that she would follow the advice of her family without considering your feelings.

Oh my goodness, That is bad really bad. If that happened to me I would be really messed up and be very pissed off and confused all at the same time. Confused because i would be asking myself do I really want to be with a person who aborted my baby just because her parents told her so. I know your married and she has to realize you are now the best part of her life not her parents and also she needs to be proud of being your wife and not hiding it from them or anyone else I guess the way to get around that is put it in the paper. But she needs to also realize that you had a say in aborting the child. If she truly loved you then she wouldn't have aborted the child she would have been proud and happy and wanting to tell the world. She is hiding your marriage like it is a ddirty secret which isn't good at all She shouldn't put her parents before you. So you need to think about it and see if this marriage is worth keeping or is over because she has now killed the trust. Don't worry about the in-laws because they seem like people that aren't worth your energy that it takes for you to be nice to them. You need some space from this woman even if you love her tell her to go home to her parents for a few days because you need to think and she needs to think about what she done. I hope you are able to overcome such a traumatic experience. I wish you peace in your turmoil. god bless.

I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you and your baby. You have every right to be angry. She had no right to do that without consulting you first since the baby was just as much yours as it was hers.

I think you need to stop and think before you do anything. Do not make any hasty decisions that you may later regret. I think that you should sit your wife down and explain to her how she has made you feel. Perhaps there are other circumstances that your wife has not told you about? If your wife was bullied by her family in to getting rid of the baby then perhaps she is also now feeling the same loss and grief as you are. I think you need to have this talk with her to clear up her motivations before you will ever be able to move on. Then once the dust has settled you will be able to decide if there is a relationship to salvage and if you even want to. I wish you my sympathy and best wishes for the future. As hard as it seems at the moment I promise you in time it will hurt less.

My heart really goes out to you. What a hard thing to bear. I can't imagine trusting a person after she does something like that. I believe a father should have rights when it comes to their unborn children. Before I met my husband, he was dating a woman for a long time who ended up pregnant. He told her he would take care of her and the baby, that he wanted to be a part of the baby's life and be responsible. She went and had an abortion without telling him and he was devastated. Needless to say, he ended the relationship shortly afterwards. As much as it hurts, you need to try and calm down and think clearly about this situation. She doesn't sound like she is very loyal to you, her husband, and as her husband you should come first in her life. If she was so worried about her family, then why did she marry you? When you are calm, sit down and talk to her and tell her how you feel, and ask her why she would do this if she claims to love you. I can't tell you whether to continue the relationship or not, that is something you have to decide. Just remember trust once broken is hard to fix.

I am so sorry to hear what happened to your baby. I don't wanna add to fire to the fuel but I just can't take what your wife did. Aborting a baby? Just to please her family. Before me and my hubby got married we attended seminars. One thing I've learned there is that the family you're about to create is your first priority at all times and not the family that you will be leaving. Yes, they will always be a part of you but i guess what your wife did is unacceptable. If your wife can't love you the way you love her, it is better for you to go on separate ways. You deserve someone much better.

I can't understand why people do that sort of things, my deapest sympathies go out to you. Its really wrong for one to judge another, however that is immorally wrong. I can't understand why your wife would do that, its just how some people are I guess. I think that your wife needs to get her priorities straight, or she's going to lose you. I think that you need to point that out too, its you or them. In a relationship its important to stand beside your partner. I am a firm believer in the fact that you should put your partner first no matter what, in marraige its not your family that will create the future of the world. If you love her just tell her that you are willing to save the relationship if she is too, don't let her push you around and tell you what she's going to do. You have to make it very clear that you don't want to continue the relationship if she's going to put them before you.