I need your support Sister ill..I not a good person!

Awwwwwwww Sweety I am so sorry about this and of course she is in my thoughts very much and so are you But if she is suffering so much you need to let hr go if it is what she wants You know I am here for you if you need me always will be My thoughts are with you and with Joan and my Love is sent with this Response to both of you Big Hugs to you Sweety I hope you can feel the Hug Pl ease let me know how things go Love you xxx

I am praying for you both..I know how hard it is to lose a mom..mine left us 3 years ago and I still miss her deeply. I was blessed to not have to make this decision you are confronted with..my mom just went to sleep healthy and never woke up..Now you have all these thoughts and feelings to deal with while she is still alive...I don't know if you can speak to her on the telephone..but that's what I did with my auntie...(like a 2nd mom) I had someone hold the phone to her ear and I poured out my heart begging her to hold on (for my selfish reasons) and then finally letting my love for her overcome my needs and telling her that it was okay to go if that's what she needed to do ...she immediately began breathing easier..and I just talked my heart out..I laughed and cried and reminded her what a wonderful influence in my life she had been...at the end of 30 minutes I told her I would see her in heaven and would hold her in my heart forever...she mumbled something..and that was the last time we spoke...but I knew she was holding on for the wrong reasons and that I was part of that process...once I released her to the light it was better for us all..I,like you was in my 50's...I still missed her ( it's been 2 years now)..Don't be ashamed..and don't degrade yourself..you are a loving person or you wouldn't have written about this...perhaps you'll find the strength to visit her,,in person or by phone...just don't let her leave without somehow knowing how much you love her and appreciate her..I will pray for your resolve in this matter...and no matter what happens know that your desire/need to hold on to her is perfectly normal..maybe admitting that to yourself will allow you to let go if that is what needs to be done...Bless you and please be good to yourself...there is no rule book..we walk in uncharted waters when we journey through the process of loss...go with your heart...you won't go wrong...Be strong and be well...I'm sending you light and love...and your God will give you strength...

I hope things will go as smooth as possible and that you are able to say any goodbyes if they are needed. I do send positivity your way and prayers will be offered. I do so hope you find your clam amidst this calamity. Take care and keep us posted!

Oh I am very sorry that you lost your mother it is dreadful when we lose them, as I have lost both my mothers my real mother and my adopted mother. But I can understand that your sister wanted to mother you, and due to her lose with her own children. Yes you are right 70 these days is not really old but Joan must be suffering a lot and wants to end her own life. Yes I do pray Raydene, and I certainly will say a pray for both of you today.

Prayers and thoughts are being sent to you today and I understand your pain. It's very hard to loose a loved one and although you realize it is best for the suffering person it does leave others with what you discribed as a raw feeling, and with the history of problems you've gone through it's to be expected you're having a hard time dealing with this terrible sickness. I hope you can find piece through prayers and support from others. Remember to take care of yourself. You need to keep strong.

First, I wish I could hug you. Letting her go, would be an act of love. keeping her is because you love her so much. God has His timing and you need to trust that!

my dear friend you have so touched my heart with your story , God bless you and you beautiful second mammy , I know just where you are coming from You are never too old to still want your Mammy , I will be 65 in a couple weeks , and my Mum has Alzheimer's as you know , I see her slowly fading away but I am like you I want her forever. Joan won't want to leave you either but she will be happy to know that you are capable of looking after yourself now and that she has raised a wonderful and loving and caring person , You know in your heart she is suffering and she probably has had enough ( my Mam keeps telling me its her time to go too ) but I am inclined to ignore her ,and this makes me feel selfish too, we are all selfish then because we all want them with us forever , don't beat yourself up sweetheart , you are just proving how much you love her , I will keep her in my prayers , God bless you my friend xxx

there is nothing to feel sorry about, you are grieving and that is normal, please don't be so hard on yourself, you love her, there is nothing wrong with that.

hi there - I will pray for you once I finish writing this. First of all, you are very blessed to have had this kind of sister in your life. And of course you don't want her to go, but this decision is not yours to make. It is hers and ultimately God's. You can tell her that you would prefer her to stay, but you need to let her go if this is what is to happen. You will meet her again in Heaven, please God. I am so sorry that you are in the middle of this situation where she may be going, but ultimately this matter is out of your hands. don't feel bad for wishing your sister would hold on, because this is what most people feel like when a loved one is seriously ill.

sorry to hear this. i hope and pray for your sister and also your family. i am sending my kind thoughts her way

ray sweetie you could never fall short of being a good person! As I write this there are tears running down my face for you! I am so sorry about the heartache your sister has had to go through and it doesn't matter what age you are to face the prospect of losing someone you love so much is a horrific ordeal for anyone. We love you and are thinking of you. I am praying for you and for Joanie, the drs are not always right you know and hopefully everything will work out ok! Let us know how things are going - and remember my heart is with you sweety! xxx big hugs xxx

Heart felt prayers for you and your family. Emotions and thoughts run wild when we are going through things like this. One minute you feel one way and the next another. It is so exhausting. Raydene, stop putting yourself down for having these thoughts. You are a good person. One of the most giving people I have ever known. I think you gave your niece good advise yesterday, but inside you are hurting just as bad as she is. Maybe talking with her again and telling her how you feel would make it easier for both of you. What we told my mom was that it was up to her. We would be here for her either way, but it was her choice and that we love her. She went the next morning. I feel so at peace about it. I really like rx4life's comment. I think you should talk to Joan one more time if you are not up to going to see her. Love you, (like a sister) Shell

i do feel sorry for you and your sister. i know how it is to loose someone that is really close to you. if this is what she really wants then let her make that dission on her own. if she cohant and able to make dissions for herself then let her. this is and will be the hardest dession you will have to make. just remember that what ever you or your sister decides to do god will not punish either one of you.

i will keep your sister in my prayer,and i want you to stay strong,if she makes it through i will be so happy for you but if she dont stay strong.but i will keep her in my prayers for you.

I think you ate reacting only normally, especially as you have always been so close.. I will pray for you and your sister..

Hey buddy i'll surelly remember your sis/mom in my prayers!!!!!! and you dont need to feel bad every human is selfish!!!!!!!!!! we all are the same! don worry... just keep in mind that god loves us the most whater will happen god has his reasons and he knows whats good for you.... so have faith!!! good luck!

I'm praying for both of you and sorry you are dealing with this. I don't see you not wanting her to go as being selfish. I see it as being caring. No one wants their loved ones to leave. It's never easy. Hang tight, say lots of prayers and just enjoy your time with her that you have right now. Remember- tomorrow never come

I think your title is way wrong though. You are not a bad person for loving and caring for your sister and wanting her to get all out of life that she can. I have worked with dialysis patients before and after a while the treatment can get to people and make them wish their life was over rather then keeping on with it day after day but just let her know your here for her and with her and love her and it might be enough to make her want to hang around a bit longer. It sounds like you had an awesome sister and it's understandable you don't want her to give up. I will pray that God will help you cope with this and give you peace with whatever your sister/mama decides to do.