How do you say goodbye?

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In 2002 my Husband at the time was told he had 18 months. Now 5 years later, we have been blessed with more time. But after all the preparing for and then coming though it I have developed a since of "the dr that cryed wolf" everytime they gave us a time limit we broke it. Now the are right on time at 9 months we laughed three months later they said 6 and three months later now 90 days. For the first time in 5 years they are right and sticking to the time line and he is going fast. We are no longer married and he has made sure the kids and I have started over and are ok without him (his way of making sure) and now its my best friend i'm losing insteed of my husband, but its just as hard. After all the false alarms and wrong dates I find myself not believing them, then I saw him in person, (something he has cut to a "not inless nessacarry status since the holidays) I know he is going and now I dont know what to do. All the years of him preparing us for the end and with the timelines never stopping us I am no way near prepared. With the "up and downs" and "this is it" and "we beat it agains" I am somewhat in denial all over again. But after seeing him, I know. I dont know if I can...How can I let him go... how do you go though the final stage and survive? And how do I stay strong for my kids? I dont know anyone that has gone though this and I need someone to tell me what to expect and how to handle it.