Different Upbringing

oooh I have such low tolerance for that nonsense....I'm very much a whats good for the goose is good for the gander type person and treating little girls like they are made of fine china drives me NUTS! Not to mention it is damaging if you really think about it....I mean you are teaching that little girl that she isnt as strong, wise or tough as her same age brother which is a load of crap iMO....I have a boy and a girl myself and I've NEVER done the whole "boys wear blue and are rough & tumble, girls wear pink and play with dolls" crap...thats just silly IMO

Hi Annie, really interesting topic I am not good in analyzing this kind of stuff but this is my view: I believe that discrimination between the two sexes by parents may occur due to different reasons: 1) The parent's background: where that particular background is more supportive or pro boys for instance so the parent automatically starts discriminating at home believing that she/he is doing the right thing and that background is divided into two types: a) Cultural or Society background : where the mother is living in a culture or in a country where women is looked at, lower. In this case, a parent may not be originally the discriminative type but his society or where he lives, is, so he raises his kid in a way so his child could fit in that particular society, such as societies where women are deprived of rights , the mother tries to make her daughter used to it or cope up with it so the latter won't have a cultural or whatever shock when she grows up. b) Parent's personal background: The past of a mother or father with his parents plays a role in formulating the mother's character, for instance a woman who was subject to discrimination or by her parents during her early years so what happens is, an extreme discriminative reaction takes place when she becomes a parent later in her life where she becomes biased either with her daughter to provide her the thing she (the mother) was lacking in her childhood OR with her boy as she subconsciously hates being a female or she believes girls must be always be treated that way coz her mother treated that way so she becomes more supportive to her boy. that reaction applies to part (a) above as well. 2) The parent personal expience with a previous child: where her daughter for instance gives her hard time while the boy doesn't so she feels that the boy should be treated better. Of course there are facts we all may have to consider when raising our kids that gurls character is different from boys so we must put these differences in mind but that's got nothing to do with discriminaion or let me say negative discrimination. There might be more to wat i mentioned above but this is what i could come up with, hey the new avatar is real cool, i love it very much x

Well, I would gladly burn my bra (not that I'm a big libber) but would treat kids of both genders pretty much the same when it comes to things like this.. And yes I think it's a mistake to make this difference. I am thinking of all the girls who love to climb trees.. of which I was one.. I do warn about dangers, running with scissors, etc.. just can't help myself, but keep a clear focus of not inhibiting the child with lots of fears!

I think its due to mere gender biasing. i don't know from which country you are. But in my country, in india, there are very much gender biasing.Girls are always kept down. Whatever they do, they will be pulled down.all wants that boys should be supreme.so this is the reason for this behaviour as I think.

I come from a family of girls only. I can't say my mom treats me the way the woman in your story treats her daughter. I've been known to climb treets, run around in the rain and play with sand. I won't say I'm a girly girl, but I'm not a boyish girl either. I honestly won't be understand why someone can treat a daughter and a son differently eventhough both are completely capable of doing the same things. Perhaps she wants to encourage the boy to be brave because men are to do more things on their own and gets less help. She may think the girl is more fragile. Unable to cope with consequences if something bad happened. I do think its easier for women to charm somenone into helping them out now and again. Smile a little, be sweet a little, and you'll have some guy doing you a favour.

The kids do the same thing ,but the response was not the same parents!Perhaps in the eyes of parents,the girls are going to have Jiaoqi paint!

I did not do this to my kids, but believe me, especially in her late teens and early twenties, my daughter resented society treating her this way. I have one son, one daughter, and they pretty much tried anything they thought they were big enough and smart enough to do. There dad was very even handed, as well, and especially wanted our daughter to have survival skills.

All children should be treated alike and with the respect they deserve. She probably also tells him 'boys don't cry'. The poor kid. I am also not a womens libber, but agree, men are definetly physicaly stronger than women.

you are right annie such things are done in almost every rigid household who think men are are dare and caretakers where as women are fickle and delicate darlings.these people simply forget that ever since ancients times women have proved themselves again and again as much stonger than man whether psycologically or emotionally.yes, biologically there is a difference as she has to play a role of life producer also. so such people should understand that difference should not in their upbringing but there is a need for them to see it differently

I think its because parents think that little girls are more fragile and more open to danger. We can't deny that there are big difference when it come to physical make up of boy and girl. But I think in this kind of situation sterotyping is bluntly. The more restriction the child gets the less chance she can learn of something new to her sorrounding. This kind of scnenario are the very procdcut of norm and stereotyping.

Yes I do agree we tend to think men are generaly stronger than girls I think that is why the mother had such an outburst when her little girl went to the press.Although them been the same age I think both could have hurt them selves just as much as the other one.

I think it is the way people are raised. Some people are raised that when a little boy falls and skins his knees, he gets up and dusts himself off and is fine. When a little girl falls and knees her knees, she cries for an hour. That is how they are raised. I don't see it that way. I do not have children. However, regardless of their gender, I would see it as dangerous. People who think like those in your example are the same people who only give Barbie dolls to girls and bats to buy. They are really shaping these children in a way I do not see as healthy.

I believe alot has to do with perception. Although there are alot of people are like me and you liberated to be equals alot more of us are not. They see the little gurl as week and fragile. While they see the boy in the opposite light. It is sad but true. I have one girl and two boys and if they can do it so can she the parts might not be all the same but they sure can pull of the same things. As a matter of a fact my daughter can do alot of things better than them. I find females have more eye for detail and pay more attension to what they are doing.

That's the kind of thing I can't stand. There's only nothing men can do that women can't and vice versa with the singular exception of giving birth. Gender roles are ridiculous.

i try to be the same with my daughter as i do my son,the way i look at it,ive got to let her stand on her own to two feet.she had to grow up her way and let no one bully her.even if i tried to scolded her,she is so independent she would do it again and again.