lost my husband to cancer

I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my husband to cancer in 1998, and was left with 2 young children 4 and 5. Yes is hard to manage a household and raise children at the same time. You sound like a very proud mum that is already aware of void in your childrens lives. If you have family perhaps they could help with being male mentors. Another thing is a good youth club like Police and Citizens Youth Club. Those sorts of things. It is a long road to travel alone, what you need to remember is. Take care of yourself also. As hard as it is, take some time for yourself now and then to care for you. I wish you well in your life journey. God Bless You.

ladyljs, I feel incredibly sorry for your loss. I lost my mum in 2001 to cancer, at the time I was 12 and had a sister of 10. Your advice is most appreciated in the way of having cancer screenings and while it has a history of being in the women in my family, regardless I have gone for two screenings with the most recent one being over a year ago. It's difficult, don't get me wrong, living with the loss of someone through cancer, even harder so when my mum knew something was wrong prior to when she realised, went, and was duly diagnosed. Regardless of this she held out for a good four years after being diagnosed and when I think back, I realise that the good times we spoke about, albeit only being twelve at the time, I know either way she's my mum and I love her dearly. Yes it's hard without her, it's hard with losing anyone you love and regardless of whether i'd lost her in a day or over a series of years it doesn't make it any easier but life has to go on. With mum gone I learnt what I could, grew up a significant amount and cooked and cleaned as much as I could while Dad worked almost daily 12 hour shifts and my sister was grieving in her own way. I lived a few years without a female influence in my life but a few years later my dad found a girlfriend who has now become my step-mum. While she is no replacement for my mum, she has helped as the motherly influence in my life. All I can say is do the best that you can, while it seems easier to say than do, know that if you do so, no-one can ask any more of you, not even the twins. All the best for the future. - Paul

I'm very sorry to hear that. Cancer is really a very dangerous and expensive disease. I hope that you have adjusted by now and that your twins be always good and healthy.

Bless yer heart Honey.My heart goes out to you..I have a friend that lost her husband to cancer when her daughter was about 3.It has been hard for her sometimes..Maybe she will answer this discussion.. And bless you for thinking of us all.

Good for you for posting this. I know I am careless about going to the doctor like I should, and that is obviously not the right choice. You sound like a great mom and you sound like you really have it together for your twins. They are lucky to have a mom like you.