Is it important to be honest about how many people you have been with before you

Ask your friend if there might not be something else bothering her about her relationship. I mean, come on, a harmless lie told 5 years ago, which she has so far gotten away with, just is not a serious problem. I am suggesting a more serious problem in the relationship that your friend has a difficult time admitting, even to herself. She should spill the beans only if she can use this to transition the conversation and her line of thought into what's really bothering her. Otherwise, being quiet is good advice. Don't fix what isn't broken.

Past is past and we should not live in the past. Leave the past and live your life to the fullest. What matters is you love one another and there is no form of cheating of any kind. As longh as there is trust and understand and the fire is there, I think the past wouldn't be a big deal at all. Goodluck!

I think your friend needs psychiatric help, because the wonders of nature have always endowed us with mechanisms to shut us off our past distasteful events. Besides, why should you go about spilling beans regarding your past? Let the sleeping dog lie, in any case her husband has not instituted an inquest into her past to worry her that the truth will be found. Is she sure her husband has told her everything abut his past? Your friend is obviously trying to ruin her marriage needlessly!

Well i do not know , why she told him this information, in the first place, it is her business, and if she did not feel comfortable sharing this with when they only started dating, then she should have told him, that this question embarrasses her, and she does not want to answer it right now. But that was already done. If they are together for 5 years already, i guess they like a lot of things at each other, and i do not think that anything happens if she would tell him that she was embarrasses of the question, when they first met and because of that she lied to him. i think he will understand. and if it really bothers her. she should tell him. and end this guilty feelings that are inside of her for the last few years.

From the beginning, me and my partner have no secrets regarding that matter. I just spilled the beans when he asked me. Before, i dont have really an intention to tell to him about my past realtionships because i say to myself past relationships arent important as long as i am faithful to him. But he asked me bout it, so i told him all. And vice versa. What i can say about the problem of your friend is that she should tell him the truth now. If the man truly loves her, he will accept her and her mistakes.

she should spill the beans... i honestly been with many gurls.. but i never hold their hands.. or touch their hands.. because i felt so insecure.. u know.. if u wanna hold a gurl hand.. u must understand that u will be loving her.. for a long time.. and not just puppy love :)

It shouldn't matter how many partners your spouse been with. Anyone can make a number about anything. You have no proof of this. So you accept them as is and hope they can walk a straight line.

i think he might have a right to know if she way lowered her number. like say she had been with more than 10. or if she could be passing something on to him without knowing it. my sister was with a good many guys before she got married...her husband knew about them but turned out she had genital warts. she didn't find out till she was pregnant because the hormones in her pregnancy made her have an outbreak. so now her husband will likely get them also. so if your friend slept with a lot more than 3 she probably should tell him.

It really isn't of relevance to your current partner to know how many people you were with before them. It is her business and if she's already told him 3 people and he's accepted that, it might cause unnecessary problems if she now told him there were more. As a guideline I would advise pepole against discussing actual figures if they are uncomfortable with this. I know some guys who have been with over 100 women but their wives have only admitted to being with 1 or 2 or none at all. This is the ultimate in hypocrisy as far as I'm concered. Best not to even discuss numbers at all to save trouble - this applies to guys and girls. x

It is, in my opinion too late for her to think of telling him now . It's something that will haunt her forever so she will just have to get used to it. And she probably is carrying around lots of quilt also. Best thing is try to forget about it Put it in the back of her mind. But then that ain't easy to do. In another five years let's hope it is a vaque memory for her.

I don't think it's extremely important. it's something that i'll let him tell me of his own accord. if he decides not to i'm fine with it too. But if it really bugs her, I'd say tell. then again it also depends on what kind of person her partner is. If he's the jealous type who holds grudges, then maybe forget it. however, if her partner is an accepting guy who loves her, i'd go straight ahead and tell him. I'd tell him that I've said 3 initially because I didn't think we were serious, but now that i know i'm truly serious about him i'd like him to know the truth. in a relationship, i think, honesty is still the best policy. The way i see it, what is important to me is the current relationship i'm sharing with this guy. as long as he's true to me and i him, i don't really want to sweat the stuff like who and how many he's been with before me. the thing is, people do change. whatever he was like before he knew me is not my primary concern. i just need to know that right now, he truly loves me. that's all i need to know.

Personally I don't want to know how many people my partner has been with and I don't want to even hear about his past relationships unless they were really signficant. Honestly i would like to forget i had a past and forget he had a past as well and just to concentrate on us and our relationship. But if she feels that guility she might as well confess. I don't think it is his right to know unless she truly feels like sharing it with him. It will probably cause a little bit of tension because she lied to him. But I doubt that it is a lie that will destroy their relationship. He probably wasn't 100% honest with his answer either. But honestly I think the past should stay in the past. You can't change it.

Well I think if it really bothers her a lot then she should open up to her husband.As you've said they have been together for five years and by that time that have already built trust to one another.Anyway, this has occured in the past and has nothing to do with the present.She has been faithful for the past 5 years they've been together.So what's to worry about!I believe revealing this secret will lead to a more honest relationship.Lastly,a peace of mind to your friend.