Some people just don't listen

when giving advice, just think that it's still the person's own decision whether he/she will listen to you. and in case the person doesnt heed your suggestion, give him/her the benefit of the doubt that maybe he knew what better to do for his/her situation. as a friend of mine had said long ago, people will fail no matter how you care for them, just make sure you are there to catch them when they lose their ground.

I think it is human nature that when people don't like what you are saying, they stop listening. I guess that is the difference between real friends, you stick around for when they realise for themselves that your advice was sound. Then you get the fun job of helping to pick up the pieces. I have been there many, many times over the years with various friends and family. It is hard to watch the train wreck in progress, but I guess we get better at learing to brace ourselves as the years go on. I think it is just important to be there in the end.

I have had that happen a few times. I've also done it myself to people that I have felt have overstepped their boundaries as far as intruding into my life is concerned so I can relate to both ends. The biggest example I have of this is my ex-business partner John, who didn't and still hasn't to my knowledge, learned how to manage his disability appropriately. On several occasions, circumstances came up that he couldn't do things he promised me he would do. I'm not saying the circumstances were his fault, I'm just saying he should have called me. We're not really friends per se any more, although we occasionally email.

Yes that is so true. What I find is that when it happens I make an evaluation of the value of the relationship to me. If it is someone that I don't really have to put up with, invest in, then its no big deal. If its an important relationship then I have to remind myself of that fact and decide that I will not give up on the person.

As a mentor, I do NOT take on the responsibility of whether someone listens or not...Most people listen to me because I speak in THEIR language, NOT mine. I focus on what I can control...I cannot control whether someone listens to me and whether they do as I advise them to. It's my duty to "share the word", NOT to convince or force people to anything. It's their decision...I can sleep comfortably knowing that I did what I was supposed to do. All I focus on is, Was I well prepared, did I do my best, was I dressed appropriately, was I audible enough etc...These things I can control.

For me it is my brother. I don't want to go into detail about what his problem is but he knew he was wrong. I thought maybe I could get through to him even if my parents could not. I thought he was just going through a stage to fit in with his friends. But then i found out that the same friends he wanted to impress were making fun of him because he was "stupid" enough to do the things they told him too. I felt bad for him and never used that as a point in trying to get through to him. His main problem with me telling him that what he is doing is wrong is that he knows i am right. He just doesn't care. So instead of nagging I just let him do his thing because I am not his parent just his sister. It might have been easier if he didn't know he was wrong because then you can change his mind but he just doesn't have the willpower to change. Hopefully, something will change - we are both pretty young.