Why don't more woman settle on just being a wife and mother anymore?
@mossjanicelynn (1240)
United States
10 responses
@Sicantik (706)
•
13 Apr 07
I used to think that once I got married and have a children and I will be a housewife looking after my family full time.
Since I used to work before I had my first son or used to earn my own money and have a freedom to spend it I begin to miss that freedom.
That's why now I compromise by working from home and still be with my children and look after my husband too...xx
3 people like this
@mossjanicelynn (1240)
• United States
13 Apr 07
If I had it to all over again, that's how I would work it, so I could be home when the kids came home from school, cook a quality meal, having the house clean. I just wish in my day that had the different opportunities that are offered today with the internet and home based jobs. I think back then you could stuff some envelopes or Avon, Mary Kay, Tupperware and Home Interiors was available. All those home shows for some free gifts.
1 person likes this
@my2luvs (158)
• United States
13 Apr 07
Well there are a few reasons why. The divorce rate. There are lot more single parent households. Women have to work to pay the bills. There have been many generations now that have been taught that we can have it all. Jobs, careers, kids. You name it. I personally chose to be a housewife. BUt my husband works his butt off to take care of all the bills. Alot of women dont want this or it just isnt feasible for them.
2 people like this
@mossjanicelynn (1240)
• United States
13 Apr 07
I never wanted to be rich, just comfortable. And with two of us working it seems hard still. But the more money you make the more you spend too. My kids are grown and gone.
1 person likes this
@my2luvs (158)
• United States
13 Apr 07
I always joke that I definitely didnt do it for the money! LOL
Its not about being rich for me its about sacrifices. We dont get alot of what we want but we have everything we need. Our bills get paid, we have plenty of food and lots of love!
@grecychunny26 (9483)
• Philippines
13 Apr 07
because woman doesn't stop for being a mother, they must have something that will help to build the family and specifically to help her husband. me, when i already have a family of my own, i will make sure that i will provide money inside it, i will not let my husband do it alone. i still have career oriented thinking and i don't wanna stop for being a housewife. atleast i can do something for the family.
2 people like this
@mossjanicelynn (1240)
• United States
13 Apr 07
Goes to show you how society has already twisted the values of woman, you don't think that being a mother/wife isn't already a job. To go bargan shopping, picking out quality food for the family. Because if you worked and tired from it all day, you would cook something probably not as healthy and nutritious as you could if you worked all day and just threw something together when you got home from a hard days work.
1 person likes this
@gbolly54 (661)
• Nigeria
13 Apr 07
What a good question/topic! I think women have got a genuine excuse in economic reason to go full-scale into the employment arena. It is true that the income from the man alone is not sufficient again to take care of the ever-increasing wants, not needs. Our throats have grown longer, and one income can't cope again. Moreover, economic downturns that made the male sole breadwinner lose the entire family's lifeline, have taught us some hard lessons not to put all our eggs in one basket. However, it was like our women themselves prayed for or created the legitimate excuse. They have embraced work with all their energy, life and soul. They have seen working and the pursuit of a career as a desirable way of gaining their freedom from the dull and beggarly life of a full housewife. I don't blame them; all humans need freedom- of movement and association, in particular. Unfortunately, some of them have overdone it. The home is dying from a lack of adequate attention. Little wonder, then, that we have a rising trend of child mal-upbringing, child abuse, juvenile delinquencies, juvenile crimes, divorces and broken homes. Let the women pursue their careers and enjoy their freedom. However, let the men and children enjoy theirs, too. Moderation is the answer.
2 people like this
@wolves69 (755)
• United States
13 Apr 07
Good answer gbolly. Most of the parents I talk to that both are working do so because of economic reasons. They just can't make enough with one salary. So, both parents go off to jobs. What do they have to show for it: too high rent/mortage, new SUV or two, cable, two cell phones, new clothes, and babysitters/day care providers! Where is the family values? The parents aren't being parents anymore.
My Grandmother used to say its not how much money you make but what you do with it. My wife choose to stay home with the kids even before we had kids. I knew I was going to be the sole breadwinner, but the family is not wanting for anything, but we know how to budget and live within our means. That means, we have more quality time to spend with the kids, and they are better for it! Neither my wife or I can stand the thought of someone raising our kids with different values then our own!
In three years, I will retire. Then the roles are reversed. I'll be Mr Mom and the Mrs goes to work if she wants. If she changes her mind (her choice), then I'll seek employment. We're not seeking to be rich, but we both agree that the family is the most important thing. As compared to the expample I gave, I'm making 60% less then the couple I described and technically, I qualify for food stamps. They can't afford their life style and the police are always at their house. While our kids have never been in trouble, have a good roof over their head, plenty of food, and are loved by both of us.
I agree with everyone wanting freedom, but to me, many are whitewashed into thinking what freedom really is when it's not.
Moderation, communication and devotion...Everything in its proper place and time but prioritize!
@cardizon (223)
• Philippines
13 Apr 07
women are getting liberated from the traditional shackles of being a wife and a mother. more and more women are being empowered by how far they could go. women become aware of their rights to rule and not remain subordinates of men as some culture stress it.
it is very honoroble to be a mother and a wife. but society still takes it as a tiny job if we equate it in monetary values. how much do house helps receive for salary? the kind of job the house helps do is just the same as what mothers do. shouldnt there be a legislation or something that mothers receive from the government some kind of incentive or support beyond what a normal citizen should receive?
@mossjanicelynn (1240)
• United States
13 Apr 07
But woman are expected to be super woman. I wouldn't have been able to have two jobs, housewife/mother and career. I like my sleep too much I guess. I don't see how young woman today can keep up. You already know what a full time job you have and it is just now being recognized as a job.
1 person likes this
@mememama (3076)
• United States
13 Apr 07
I think it's todays society. There's two conflicting sides or pressures to us, there's the feminist side that says get a job and survive on your own, and there's the other side that says stay at home and raise your children. I hope that makes sense, but it's a struggle to balance your individuality while being at home. When I first stayed at home, it was very hard on one income. There were a few days where I didn't eat because I had to feed my son before me. Now my husband got a better job, so we are well off financially. I do admit that I'm not to career oriented, I did go to college, I did climb the ranks from retail slave to a manager. But I really don't think that's important to me. Those are just jobs, but my son is only a child for a short time!
@blackbriar (9076)
• United States
14 Apr 07
I believe it's a little of both. Cost of living and just being bored is what keeps me working. I was a stay-at-home mom for 3 yrs. but was getting too bored at home so found a job.
@lightningMD (5931)
• United States
13 Apr 07
I think that part of the reason is because more women wait to have kids later in life than before. So they are already established in a career that they dont want to give up or put on hold. Also they may have already acquired debts that take two incomes to pay off. I combined the best of both worlds. I stayed at home with my kids and ran a day-care from my home for income.
@palonghorn (5479)
• United States
13 Apr 07
I think it has a lot to do with needing two incomes in the family because of the high cost of living. But I also think that as times have changed the idea of 'housewife' has changed too. I chose to be a stay at home mom when my girls were young, but after they got older, and they started doing things on their own, I decided it was time for me to also do something for myself. I also went thru divorce which had an impact on my decision. However, now they are proud of their mom for what she has accomplished, and they also see that women can make a difference and make their own way in the world. For so long it was believed that you had to be married, have children and be 'just' a housewife. As for the notion of 'having it all', I think that is impossible, something somewhere is going to suffer.
