Running TOWARDS vs. running AWAY from-- what do you do?
By Denmarkguy
@Denmarkguy (1845)
United States
April 15, 2007 1:03pm CST
OK, so it's Sunday morning here, and I am in a "thinking" frame of mind. And I got to thinking about what motivates people, on a very deep level.
One of the things I have noticed about people, is that there tends to be two main "strategies" in life-- and they tend to be rather consistent, in many folks. People either "move towards" or they "move away" from.
What's the difference? Well, it's often subtle. I'll try to offer some examples.
How we approach PAIN (physical, psychological, emotional-- all kinds), is perhaps one of the more obvious ones. Some people run AWAY from pain to get to pleasure-- that is, their focus is on AVOIDING pain. They find comfort (and even pleasure) through a process of "removing" pain, and living with "what's left over." In contrast, other people move TOWARDS pleasure. Their motivation is on moving TOWARDS what they want, without any particular awareness of what they DON'T want.
This can also be applied to things like relationships (Towards: looking for the relationships you WANT; Away from: Avoiding the relationships you DON'T want) or even a physical move (You can either be "running AWAY" from where you DON'T to be, or "running TOWARDS" the place you DO want to be. It could be applied to religion-- do you AVOID (away from) the WRATH of God, or do you SEEK (towards) the LOVE of God?
As I said, it's often subtle-- and often we use a blend of the two strategies. However, for the majority of people, one dominates over the other. It takes a little "pause for thought" to recognize our own pattern-- although we can often more readily see it in friends, spouses, lovers and associates.
So, which kind of strategy do you think YOU use? If you can see your pattern, were you aware that you had one? Do you have any ideas WHY you choose as you do?
No "right" or "wrong" answers-- just interested to see what others think.
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1 response
@brokentia (10389)
• United States
15 Apr 07
That is very hard to figure out about one's self. It really takes some thinking!
Let me see if I have it. ha ha
OK, when I was young and full of answers, I believe I ran toward things. But with experience, I have learned that what I thought I wanted was not really what was good for me. So, it later changed as I learned. I would avoid the things that I knew I really did not want in life.
I am not a violent person. I do not like fighting or arguing, but I will stick up for myself and others in a calm manner...ok, most of the time. ha ha
So, my most recent move to a different state is actually the result of running away.
I thought I wanted to move back to my home state. But it turned out to be a place that I no longer wanted to raise my children. And after my son being severely injured by the sitter, I had to get away from it all. I wanted to hurt that person so badly and the emotional pain was so great, I could not take staying in the state I was raised in. So, as a family, we ran away to Oklahoma. Where I have no friends or family. I do not have to face them with my anger towards the sitter...my brother. And I do not have to see him again knowing that he nearly killed my son.
So, I think I run away. But if one stopped and viewed it another way...I might be running toward the hope of a peace of mind and heart too.
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