should we...

I think a positive, caring approach is better. There is no need to raise your hand to your child if you have succeeded in gaining control during the early years, and respect during the later years of their childhood. If you raise your hand and smack them, then they won't feel they have the ability to discuss their problems or worries with you. They will be afraid to, in fact. I consider it far more beneficial to gain their trust and confidentiality than to smack and make them feel inferior. Therefore, I feel the explanation approach is the better. Brightest Blessings.

There are many different ways to discipline a child without resorting to physical force. Since emotional abuse also exists, we have to be careful not to belittle children either. Tell them why their ACTIONS wdere wrong, don't tell them that THEY were bad. Tell them how you don't like it when they run into the street, for example, because it's not safe, not that they are bad children for running into the street. Do you want your children to grow up thinking it is right to hit people? If not then don't hit them. You can't do something to or in the presence of a child, and expect them to grow up knowing that action is wrong. You need to set a good example as a parent.

Let me see here, I would NEVER spank my children in any way. I was abused as a child any almost any form of discipline is wrong in my eyes. But I do agree with time out, such as sitting my son on the couch, sending him to his room or even standing him in the corner. Sometimes, if it comes down to it, I will smack his hand if he reaches for a something he should not have repeatedly. I will firmly tell him no, if that don't work, then time out. If time out don't work, that is when I smack his hand. I find my son really listens to me when I talk to him like a real person by politely saying "No son, if you grab at that(hot pan for instance) it could burn you really bad, and mommy doesn't want to see you hurt." This approach always seems to work for me.

In general if the family is stable I believe most children will listen to reason and respond to love, most of the time. Let's say 90%. I never smacked or caned my son for doing anything wrong. Certainly not for anything he did at school.A child should never be punished twice. Very occasionaly it was a question of challenging my authority. Then I used to give him a few on his backside with a ruler. The father is head of the household in my family. The parents should back each other up. So long as children listen to reason, OK. But once a parent loses his or her authority all is lost. Mind, I thought being caned at school was part of the process of growing up and something to be proud of. Not that my parents were ever told , either by me or the school. The parents of course should never lose their temper, always give a good example and try to be fun. At the end of the day they are the boss and too much democracy is a bad preparation for life. http://sometimesomewhere-vnrozier.blogspot.com

Really, there is no best single approach. For me, parenting is an art, and there is no magic formula to it. Physically beating the child is tantamount to child abuse, so it's a no, no unless it's impossible not to administer it. I agree that parents should explain a lot of things to their children, like why they should limit phone calls, why they should not go out at night unnecessarily, why they should respect other people, why they should comply with school rules and regulations, and a lot more. Open communication with children yields more positive results. This is based on a personal experience. Of course, we don't restrain children's creativity if they wish to "test their wings". But this should be balanced with precautions and words of wisdom from us parents. Like my son asked permission to drive our car the first time. After a lengthy discussion and precautions, we allowed him as we noted his enthusiasm. Well, children are adventuresome, but we parents are just too afraid for them. When my son finally did his formal driving, we always prayed for his safety. It is never easy to be parents. I admire you for your concern of becoming a better parent for your kids. Congratulations!

Nope, it's better just sparing the rod and spoiling the child =) My mom used to hit me to disipline me but as a result I've always had a real dislike towards my mom that stuck with me until I was old enough to leave the house. So unless you really don't care if your child dislikes you or uses violence themselves either in other places, towards their own children, etc. then maybe hitting kids isn't right for you.

well raising our hand to the children isnt really helping anyone i think just making the situation worse. you need to say yes or no and then put an reason in the sentenance so they understand there and then. and not yelling or shouting etc. just example, johnny wants to do something he not ment to because he could get hurt, i would say johnny stop, you can not do that because you will hurt yourself. i guess i have learnt to talk that way because im a childcare teacher

the best way to raise an children to be in good parents. when we have mutual understanding with our children it can give us alot of bonus point to raise them as an good human. i don't think, spanking an child can fix the problem. spanking means...distancing ur child away!! time outs, discussion, and parenting rules can be best triggers to raise our children.

To me, hitting kids because they've done something wrong is acceptable. They need to be disciplined at an early age. They need to be taught what's right and what is wrong. Of course hitting kids for no reason at all is unacceptable and parents to who this should be punished.

I believe that both spanking and "time out" can be benifical. Now I would never beat my child nor would I ever hit him in a fit of rage or with all my stregth, but.... When a child is small say 6 months to 2 years a good talking to isn't going to stop them from trying to grab anything and everything in his/her reach. I feel at that age it is okay to pop their hands to let them know their boundaries. At the arrival of the "terrible twos" and on for that matter, I feel that a time out to a designated spot (not his/her room) does wonders. My son is four now and he is very well behaved the most important disaplinary act is being consistant. Always follow through.

i think it's very important to understand adolescence.. you'll just have to talk with them in a proper way.. yes.. they might not understand.. and tend to go against you.. but you have to solve problems with them.. not for them.. you do get what i mean right? they need to understand and learn too.. and at that age.. they rarely accept others opinion and orders.. they felt as if they're already an adult and their parents still have to control them... don't ever smack a teenager.. it won't bring any good effect.. trust me.. you can scold your child and hit him when he's younger.. to teach him what's right and what's wrong.. but .. when he/she is a teenager.. use the proper way.. talk to him or her like they're your friend.. not your children.. you will see the effect changes =)

we should handle children wit love we should not be rough with dem because if you are rough they will develop hatred towards their parents and its not good for their career also. We should explain them the disadvantages of the things which they are doing and should not hurt dem.

I feel that raising our children by explaining to them right and wrong and why they should not do this or that is better. I do not feel that you should ever raise your hand and hit a child. My husband and I took classes on how to help our son with his ADHD without getting angry and ending up spanking him for his behavior. They were quite helpful, learning that using the time out method for ourselves instead of having Travis sit in time out, ended up being one of the best things that we learned. I have a young friend that I know that had a child at 19, and she was barely more than a child herself in her actions. She was offered parenting classes when she signed up for WIC and I really want her to go. She still has trouble with the baby, and she is only 6 months old now, and not a handful at all. But, I really want the mom to take these classes, because we end up with the baby on a weekly basis because mom is so stressed out. I think if first time parents were to use these classes to help them understand the way to help parent the child without violence, our world would be a better place.

i think, childrean should not be hurt in order to learn their lessons. it would be better to talk in a nice way and tell them what's wrong. just like teens, listen to their friends more than grown ups, one reason is because their friends give them comfort, they know that if there would be something wrong, they friends would understand them and won't raise their voices. which sometimes lead them in the wrong directions. it's just that it's easier to communicate with people who will understand you, people who are easier to talk to than those who react in more hurtful manner..

can't say anything.