I've Become A Hermit

I'm a 'recluse' hehehe ... same thing different word .. I haven't been out in the evening for about 10 years .. I don't feel comfortable going out these days .. and I rarely meet folks who I want to actually spend time with .. I don't work, I'm not married, I don't have children around me, so I rarely have anything in common with most folks .. Just as well I have always been a loner .. and generally have far more fun staying in on my own than going out with people I dislike to places I hate .. Pity you don't live nearer to me .. I'd happily come round and spend a nice quiet night in with you .. two like minds ...

Yes sweety I have - but only when my depression has been really bad - or the pain has gotten too much! I am worried about you - you are too loveley to live like this - you should be spreading that wonderful personality of yours over many, many friends who make you feel good about yourself! Do you think you might be depressed sweets? I am not trying to say that you shouldn't live your life in the way you wish - I just want you to have the best life you can cos you are really special! I know you have had a really hard time in the past but not everyone is a bully - and if anyone picks on you you could set me on them - I get a bit like a pit bull when someone hurts my friends or family! lol xxx

I've become the same way to a certain point. I have kids so I HAVE to leave the house sometimes, but if I don't have to, I don't! I'd rather be in my own little space and away from everyone else. I'm 29 going on 80! I used to love being out, going places, partying, socializing, but now, I just don't want to do anything.... Maybe we are depressed? I don't know...

Sometimes I feel like this- But I'm happy in my relationship and I could just stay home and enjoy the peacefulness. Sounds like you're in a rut- Don't keep thinking you will get used and abused again- Love yourself- get your self-esteem back and move on. You can find happiness- Unless you are happy now- Doesn't the thought of growing old by yourself scare you?

I am the opposite i love going out and love clubbing going out for meals meeting friends. I reckon your out of practise and fear of the unknown the thing is if you never try anything you'll never know what your missing, you make a lot of excuses and have let one person dominate and rule your life it's time to let go of the past your 35 and you really have to start living rather than existing. I went out shopping today met up with a good friend and feel alive i want you to feel the buzz of life!

I am doing the same thing. Unless I have to go somewhere I would rather just stay in, I feel very comfortable and safe in my little apartment. I can't stand going out and socilaizing any more. I have enough thing in my place to kepp me busy and entertained.

I feel exactly the same way, I can do all I need to do from the computer I literally never have to go out, and if I didnt have the internet it wouldnt matter I'm pretty resourceful otherwise..I am reminded of the song "It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine",lol. I don't feel 65 though, I'm right around your age, but I feel ageless ,rather.Doesnt bother me a bit.

nope i havent ever felt that way..you sounds as if you really hate the world before..start socializing now, meet new friends and avoid those who have hurt you before..live life to the fullest.. we got only one life to live here..thats the only encouraging thought that i would like to share with you now..

I love the quiet evenings. watching tv and playing on the computer. I have a great time being a hermit. I like the relaxing down time after a busy day. When would I have time to post here if I wasnt lol I work on the computer all day and still like to be onn mylot in the evenings. Hermits rock!!!!!!

I think thats normal. But I guess you situation may last a short time. If you happen to find someone you are fond of, you like to chat with him or her, you like to go to movie, ball dance with that special one, you may then wish to hand out somewhere with that person.

i get this way periodially...where i just will feel that doing anythign other than layin gin my bed curled up with y animals is just too much bother. Then again, there are other times wher ei jsut cannot stand to be at home and i just HAVE to get out or i will go crazy. i really don't go out with friends anymore. Not really by choice. More because of my health. i do have friends over once in awhile, though. Brian, if you don't want to go out, why not invite your friendds to your home? i mean, i knwo you say you don't really want to socialize, but the tune might change if your friends were in your home rather than asking you to go out everywhere.

Awwww wolfie you have to try to get out of that slump my friend dont cut yourself off from the world. We all get that way sometimes but dont let it go on to long my friend. At least you are still going to the gym and out twice a month you are not totally house bounding yourself yet and wolfie dont let it happen. I know what i am talking about i did if for alot of the reasons you mentioned and i pulled myself out of it and good thing it almost destroyed me. You are a real sweety and dont let this take over your life. Reach for the stars wolfie like i have and dont ever stop ok. keep on keepin on ok later sweety

all the time. sometimes life just doesnt seem to be going the way I want, and I just dont want to deal. When i feel this happening, i allow myself 3 days to wallow in my own pity. After that, I make myself go out. Nothing fancy. maybe to the market one day, a friends for dinner the next, say hi to mom the day after. No where where I'll have to be social, but just to make myself leave the house. Eventually, I get back to normal, which for me still isnt very social, but at least it doesnt become a chore to leave the house. Remember, the only person you have to make happy, is yourself.

I can say that im pretty much the same i use to like going out hanging out with friends but lately i felt the need to be alone. Its on and off for me though like a few months i like going out and then the other months i like staying at home with my dog and watch tv and occasionally go on the computer.

I get out only a few times a month and that is to go to the grocery store or if I have a appointment. I don't have extra money to get out and if I did I couldn't because I don't have a car and there isn't any buses where I live and taxis are to expensive I live up a holler about 10 miles from town. We have to pay people to take us to town and it is usually straight there do our business or shop and get straight back home no getting out and going places. I haven't really no true friends, just family and in-laws. So going out would be a treat for me indeed. I love staying home reading,crocheting,myloting,etc.. bit to get out occasionally is good for us. So if it is possible to get out you might need to just a few extra times. My aunt started like you now she has a phobia about being around people even family I wouldn't want that to happen to you. And after awhile maybe your friends will noice your not accepting their invites anymore and then stop asking then you lose touch..not good I lost touch with all my friends. It is a lonely exixtence out their without friends..Be good to them and yourself and get out and live life..You can stay at home when your 65 but I hope you are a spunky 65 year old that still will have some get out and go into you.

I go through phases like that - sometimes I'm a real homebody and hardly leave the house apart from going out to work, other times I'm hardly ever in the house apart from when I'm sleeping! I tend to hibernate in the winter months when it's cold etc. My friends get really fed up with me I think! Anyway you should make the effort and get out more. Sometimes it's good to enjoy your own company but not all the time. I went through a phase like that in my mid-30's after a bad break-up. I think it was almost a year before I went out socialising again so I know it's easy to get into that rut but it's not really a good place to be for too long!

Felt this way? You could have been discribing me. I don't go out unless I have to. If it wasn't for grocery shopping or driving someone to the doctors I don't go out. I have the tv, I have the computer and my family. I have friends on line I talk with. I have mylot where I can discuss things with people and earn money. I often feel far older then I am, of course I have chronic pain that doesn't help with that, but I could easily see me as the crazy lady with the cats everyone is afraid of. So you are not alone at all in this. I too am a hermit or a recluse. For the most part I don't mind it although there are times I wish I could go out more. However since I'm agoraphobic in that I can't deal with crowds at all and no money it makes it hard to do more then stay at home.

Perhaps you have already experienced being betrayed or sme to that effect, basing from your discussions here, you trust again or socialize be optimistic its how life really are, at times you are down then the next youre up, cheer up! at least you have someone to talk you still, then i could say thatyou are in semi- hermit stage.

I used to be like that for some years in my life I think around the age of 22 to 25. It was terrible and not healthy. but then results of my efforts and stubbornness showed and like a butterfly I was free :) One day this will happen to you too, just go easy on yourself now.

You are not the only hermit in this world. There are a lot of people out there who feel the same way as you do and I'm one of them. I consider myself as an extrovert person. But being extrovert doesn't necessarily mean that I could go out socializing all the time. There were times when I needed to get some quiet times with myself. There were times when I wanted to stay at home for a longer time and refused invites from other people too. You see, every one needs to be with themselves once in a while. With your situation, it's already your choice to socialize with other people at least twice a month. I don't find it bad at all. Just don't forget not to be too hermit because a life which is being surrounded by 4 walls all the time is not good anymore as well. :) We all need to balance everything. :)