living up to your potential

Thanks for the support, I have tossed this idea around for the past for the past 3 years or more. Some feel because of my age it would be a waste of my time.My self esteem is a bottom low right now. The biggest problem I have is putting my self first. I always feel like I am at the bottom of the heap. When I really should be putting my needs, desires first. I guess at my age I have stopped taking care of me, at least the way I should. Iam just starting to realize that if I don't put my self first then I won't be worth much to me or to the people around me. The issue I have is when I or anyone starts to put themselves first you are told you are being selffish it just seem to be to hard to make a decision that is a personal gain, even though you feel you have the potential to increase your quality life. I guess the first step would to be make myself equal with those I love and care for. Not sure if you are aware of the "Maslows Hiearchy" of needs but it says human beings must meet the basic needs before they can move on to higher level goals, realizing this I believe I am on the right track I am working on my physical health (working get the rest I need, exercising, and eating healthy) and thanks to positive people like my children and yourself I feel I am starting to get the support. I also feel getting your personal life in order is important learning to say NO and only saying Yes to those things that matter to you. I guess there are other things I could do to jump start my mission to success, I always feel I need to problem solve everyone's problems, in evaluating what changes i need and can make I have decided to take 1-2 problems and work on them, I have to realize I can solve everyone's problems. I am thinking this will help guide me into the direction of going back to school and reaching my potential. When we reach 40 and older its hard to realize there is still more that we can achieve and do with our lives. If you have any suggestion I would love to hear them.

Dear Calycro; There is nothing wrong about putting yourself first. After all, how can you take care of others if you do not take care of yourself first? It is not being selfish at all. There are so many things that we can do when we reach age 40 and older, believe me when I say that. You can tackle more things better, face obstacles without hesitation. You know why? Because we know at this point there is no turning back. We've gone past the battle of puberty, of finding ourselves, suffer heart breaks, etc...And if you are a parent, you have nurtured the next generation, so what else can defeat us? I say ---bring it on! Let me share with you my personal experience. I have been already working, with a stable income for an airline, then I decided to go back to school and study about technical support. A lot of my friends say, it may be too late for me because , not only is it a male dominated field, but at my then age of 37, learning something from scratch, then finding the necessary experience at an entry level would be very impossible. I perservered...I quit my job, I took my then 5 year old daughter and husband with me to Texas to attend an IT bootcamp for a full month. I did not have any IT experience, nor was I a tech junkie like most of the folks out there. There were times I was lost on the fast trak course that I took. But, after a month burning eyebrows and researching...took some tests which I passed, I became fully licensed! I did not stop there, realizing that I needed a job, I went to all the job fairs I could find, and it was there where I honed my interview skills..I did not know impromptu interviews happen at the Tech Job Fair...on the spot. I did not quite make it in my first few attempts then finally I got the break. One of my online applications were accepted, and the agency sent me for an interview. I went to several interviews and everytime I said to myself, I will land that first tech job---which I finally did after 3 months of hunting and interviewing. In my current job I started entry level, then in 3 months got promoted to 2nd level...then now, at 42 going on 43, I am a manager of a unit or 3rd-4th level escalations. The people reporting to me are all male...and they have stayed with me through thick and thin. If I did not go with my guts and if I listened to the negative inuendos of my friends ---(which they still are, they were just a bit pessimistic because of what they have heard based on other people's experiences and were just concerned about me) I would not be here where I am at now. So my biggest advice to you is- know your passion and believe in yourself. Age is just a number, and dreams do not retire :) I am still dreaming, and would love to fulfill my dreams...whether I am 50 or older when I do, it doesn't matter. I'd like to start my own business and make it grow. There are so many possibilities out there...it's up to us to take the chance, without taking the chance you would never succeed.

As I start to I realzie I am not alone and I haven't lost the opprotunity to achieve my dreams or potiental. I also feel if we don't take care of ourselves sooner then later we won't be much to anyone else much less to ourselves. Lately I have found myself at the bottom of the heap, and what I really need to do is put my self and needs and desires first. My problems is this seems to be such a selfish act and seem to be to hard to do. I think the best place to start might be trying to put myself on a equal foot with those I love and care for. I don't know if anyone has heard of the "Maslows Hiearchy of Needs" but it says human beings must meet their basic needs before they can move on to higher level of goals. I believe I am on the right track, I am working on my physical health ( getting enough sleep, exercise and eating healthy) I am starting to build a support system at home and on mylot that is a step in the right direction. I also feel working saying NO and leaving YES to those things that are important to me! I feel one of the barriers that I need to overcome before I can set more personal goals is to realize I can't change everthing or solve every problem as a problem solver I have always felt it was part of my job to solve all problems don't know if any of you are having the same feelings as I, but it is hard to try to make changes and adjustments to your personal life. So as my first step and postive changes is stop trying to solve everyone's problems, I am going to try to take on 1-2 problems at a time, this will allow me time for me and help work toward a goal of going back to school. Feeling good about my selve will help to build my confidence;I am going to start to grab the bull by the horns realize my potential and go back to school. If anyone has any more suggestion that would be great!!