2 yr.old niece is driving me crazy
By nicolecab
@nicolecab (923)
United States
June 4, 2007 9:56am CST
My sister in law droped my two year old niece off this morning. She is pregant with her second child so I am giving her a break for the day. She is going through seperation issues and has been by the door since her mom left over an hour ago screaming for her mommy. I left her alone because when you try to move her or talk to her it just makes matters worse. I also have a three month old son that she is upsetting due to all the screaming. How long will the tatrume last and is there any thing I can do to help the situation? Please Help Me!!!
4 people like this
13 responses
@stacyv81 (5903)
• United States
4 Jun 07
Well, this is a tough one. I would try to find something to distract her. TO calm her down. But not focus on the problem which is her mom is gone. Tell her that she will definitely be back and then leave it alone. Distraction, works best with 2 year olds. I have a 3 year old and often have to distract him with the fact that daddy left, for work, or whatever he is leaving for.
2 people like this
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
4 Jun 07
yes, I will try that. I hope it works. I have even tried telling her that she is going to make the baby cry if she keeps it up and I got nothing!
1 person likes this
@stacyv81 (5903)
• United States
5 Jun 07
Yes. I do that with my three year old. Telling him he'll wake his sister, but I get nothing as well. He couldn't care less, because he isnt the one that has do deal with a really tired baby. I hope it worked out for ya.
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
6 Jun 07
Nope she did not seem to mind if he was woken up at all!!
1 person likes this
@nageswari75 (675)
•
4 Jun 07
Oh dear,this is a hard one!a 2 yr ld is fiercely independant but still a child!I agree with the others,maybe somehting like a toy or a chocolate or icecream which would distract her?Or try putting on a DVD of some cartoon films or series like tom and jerry etc..I hope her mum comes home soon:)
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
6 Jun 07
Yes, I tried the toys and I really did not want to give her a ice cream or a popscile due to it being kinda early, but that usually works!! Thanks!!
1 person likes this
@Meljep (1666)
• United States
4 Jun 07
Hopefully by now she has stopped screaming, for your sake. It's impossible to talk about the seperation problem with a 2 year old. The only solution is what others have said -- ignoring the screams and distraction. If this is the first time you've done this it is even more important that she leaves with good taste in her mouth. If she does, then next time won't be as hard.
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
18 Jun 07
she is around me a good bit and knows who we are I have not kept her by myself though. I usually have my husband here or at least one of parents but never just me.
@kareng (61201)
• United States
4 Jun 07
Tell her that her mother will be back soon but she needs to be quiet because the baby is sleeping. Tell her if she quiets down she can pick out a movie to watch. And if she sits quietly watching the movie tell her she can have a treat. You will need another activity lined up cause 2 year olds don't have a very long attention span. Best to find something for her to do. You might even try letting her be your helper and let her try to fold some clothes. (grin)
Have fun! lol
1 person likes this
@kareng (61201)
• United States
10 Jun 07
You might prepare a surprise for her for the next time she stays. Get a box like a shoebox and put in a few things that will help entertain her. Tell her that is is HER box for when she visits you and you will keep it at your house for her. You can put some easy coloring books and washable markers or colors in there. I know she is only two but she will soon be ready for somthing like this. A small doll from the dollar store would also be nice. You can add things or get a bigger box if she will be there a lot. The key is to keep it exciting and add some new stuff to it every now and then to keep her interested. As she gets older you can add some craft ideas. There are lots of things around the house and kitchen to entertain. She can make a picture with beans if you supervise her with the glue. She can give this to her mom when she gets back. Kids love surprises :)
1 person likes this
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
10 Jun 07
Yeah, we tried the movie thing. I did not think of letting her help do things. I will remember that for next time!!
1 person likes this
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
11 Jun 07
That is a good idea. I will do that!!
1 person likes this
@trinidadvelasco (11401)
• Philippines
5 Jun 07
my eldest daughter used to be that way, too. perhaps girls act that way with their moms or, it could that eldest child who happens to be a girl (joke, joke, joke). anyway, my mother used to let her keep on crying until she got tired. by then, she will eat, the child will go hungry after all the crying, you know and then, a little later, she will keep. that crying must have drained her of her strength! my mother used to laugh whenever she remembers this incident.
@yamahagirl (415)
•
4 Jun 07
Hi there,
First can i say its nice of you to be giving her a break,
My two year old screams all the time lol,
this poor little girl i dont think that she is having tatrumes i think theres a lot going on in this poor little girls head her mum is having another baby which for a child of that age mosly likley feels a bit left out even tho the baby aint born yet? and then the seperation makes things worse we think that kids that age dont understand but they understand alot there very clever kids these days.
1 person likes this
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
21 Jun 07
Yes, she knows that there is another one on the way she does not even allow her mom to hold my son who is 3 mo. or she flips out so I know she is prob under a lot of stress herself and she does have to stay with some one every time her mom has a docs visit so that is a little hard for her to.
@nicolecab (923)
• United States
13 Jun 07
none of that would work I tried it all. Thanks for the help.
@samtaylorskykierajen (7977)
• Canada
4 Jun 07
You are doing the right thing by just leaving her alone until she calms down . Try doing something that you think she might like to do but without asking her . Eventually she will notice what you are doing and come over to you . It is really hard to say how long this will last as each child is different and sometimes children who are strubborn can last like this for a long time but just keep trying to get her attention without talking to her and don't talk crossly with her even if your nerves are getting frayed because this will only upset her more ( I am sure you realize this but I know how hard it can be not to snap when you just want to pull your hair out ) .
Best of luck !!
1 person likes this
@mamasan34 (6518)
• United States
10 Jun 07
Distraction distraction distraction! You have to find something that she loves to do and get her to do it, remove her from the door even if it is physically. She is going to miss her mommy and she needs to realize that her mom will come back. Just gently sit her on your lap and tell her mommy will come back. Don't call mommy, just get her to choose a movie like a big girl and hopefully that will work. I feel for ya!
@beautyqueen26 (16030)
• United States
7 Jun 07
I'm sure this advice is a little late. But, next time, you might stock up on kids videos that you would play while your neice or younger relatives are visiting. My three year old loves Shrek, Monsters Inc and the Grinch. And they're kid friendly, too!
They are real lifesavers. You'll thank your lucky stars for every minute of peace that these movies give you.
Plus, you could try sitting down next to her when she throws a tantrum, with a coloring book and drawing with crayons. She will want to help you, of course. When she does, offer her a crayon.
Best of luck!
@liera0 (280)
• Philippines
5 Jun 07
i'm not a mom but i got a niece. i usually show her something nice to do. something for them to explore. once i hand her a box of crayons and papers..at first she didnt stop crying but all i did was draw something on the paper then i left her after a few minutes she starts to subdue and end making drawings and show it to me. most kids only wants attention. tantrums show their insecurity. a hug and kiss and comforting words will do sometimes.
@paradise12 (938)
• India
5 Jun 07
Well this is a very difficult what you could do is distracr her from what she is doing and make her do something different.I think u should give her toys make her watch television,talk to her.I think this should work.all the best..
@yellowgirl (7)
• Ireland
5 Jun 07
the only thing I could think to do is sit her down and reassure her the mummy will be back soon try distract her with a toy and if possible maybe ring her mother and let the child her mummmy say she will be home soon. might mack her feel better.
