Is holding the door for someone just not "in" anymore?

I live in a small town in Nebraska and we still hold doors for each other and smile and say hello when we meet someone. We even still use small talk even if we really don't know the other person. We still wave at strangers as we meet each other in our vehicles. I think that in most places these things have kind of passed away into the past, but in some places where life moves just a little slower yet they do still exist.

Sad, isn't it. I work in retail and the messes people leave in the fitting rooms is unbelievable. We've even had dirty diapers left on the floor. I find that young Asian people are the rudest in stores, and we have to follow them around the racks picking things of the floor that they've dropped there on purpose, yet their parents go out of their way to be helpful, often putting away things they didn't even try on, so you know they weren't raised that way. I think its a new sign of "coolness" to be rude to people who actually have a job.

This is an excellent post. I am 100% with you on this one! I always hold the door open for people but there a lot of people who have no manners at all. It is simply rude. Don't worrym there are still many people with manners in the worlds. There are just those who do not. It has always been the case and always will be. That's just life.

I see it all the time- I still hold the door for anyone around me- whether they are older than me or not- It’s called common courtesy- More people should do it- I can’t complain though I usually see people doing this- I am like you in I try to smile at others a lot- A smile goes a long way- I know when I’m down and someone smiles at me- I tend to cheer up a bit- The old saying- Smile- it’s contagious! : ) there’s a smile for you!

I don't think it's a sign of rudeness, some people just weren't brought up on those manners. People that are, are usually conscious of being courteous and usually do little things like that, holding the door, giving an elderly person a seat if all are taken in a waiting room.. things of that nature are all old fashioned and some people just...aren't brought up that way. I wouldn't call them rude, though. I do this though, and I've noticed my family does. It's nice holding doors for others, but have you noticed that sometimes the other person you held the door for doesn't even thank you? That's another thing I rarely see, when someone thanks you for the little things that you might do for them. It's certainly bothersome at times, but I'm still going to bring my kids up to be courteous to others - even if they aren't to you.

I live in the South, and I don't want to make it sound as if I'm knocking any other region, but it seems that in more rural areas (I also happen to live in a small town) there are better manners and less harsh people. It might be a defense mechanism as in more urban areas, there's more of a push for a faster more self-involved life just to survive, for one's own security. Again, I'm not trying to offend anybody, and this is based on assumption not experience. But I do try to be as polite as I can within the realms of safety. I think that is the main issue. People are concerned with their own security.

I agree with you.I was raised to be polite and respectful to other people especially my elders.Not the only people who ARE the elders.I've had the door slammed thing and just yesterday at the post office a girl stepped out of line went and filled out whatever then came back to her former place in line and shoved her way back in,in front of the elderly lady with the walker she had been in front of.She should have went to the back of the line,I would have.But no,I'm sure whatever she was doing was WAY more important than anyone else.It just ticks me off how truly rude and self centered some of these people are.And drivers! Somewhere there is an unwritten law the you can't get behind another car as long as there is any space at all in front of it.It's true,I know because it's happened so many times I've lost count.And most of the time there won't be another car anywhere close behind me,but still they must be in front even if I have to slam on my brakes to let 'em in.That has happened several times and well as being passed from the wrong lane.Such as right turn only,straight only or emergency lane.I ran one off the road for that yesterday evening.I was going through a light about half a car length from the person in front of me when I see this little black Honda speeding up on my RIGHT side in the turn only lane.I could have slammed my brakes but I'm like UtUh,not this time.He ran out of lane and had to go through the ditch to keep from hitting the car behind me.Stupid impatient,self centered,reckless,careless people.It's a sad world we now live in and I too miss the 'good old days'.

Winky in my book it is and should be encouraged ,like so many of the common courtsey practises they have gone by the way i was just in another post discussing much the same things .I think we all need to start educating our children to be more understanding and respectful from the start then a lot of whats happening in this world today would change for the better. If you think you are old fashioned i was bought up to respect my elders and to this day i can not even call my in laws by their first name and i`m nearly fifty i was taught never to call anyone ten years my senior by their first name and to this day still can`t do it . Winky you are an angel do never change too bad there are not a lot more like you in this world it would certainly be a much better place if there were .Take care and stay safe.

I think it has something to do with the age group. Older people still are polite enough to remember their manners. When I was growing up good manner were a sign of good breeding or class. Most young people today dont get it drummed into their heads the way it used to be.

As far as I am concerned, it is still polite to open the door for someone. Politeness never goes out of style. It is still ok to be old fashoined and respect others. You are right, at lot of times people are not paying attention to what they are doing. Ignore these people because you cannot change them. And it isn't worth getting upset over.

I know I was taught the same way.I still say execuse me and sorry if I get in someone's way.I'm truely convince that nobody know how to say please or thankyou anymore.My exboyfriend told me that I would find myself in trouble someday because I look people in the face too much.I'm ignored so much that I should have a sign on my back say I'm invisible.

Gosh, I get that a lot too~! And I don't understand it~! I was just wondering about the same thing myself too. The other day I saw a lady struggling to open the door while having her hands full with her 3 little boys and a stroller. And NO ONE that was near her even offered to open the door for her! I quickly walked up to her and opened the door for her while my boyfriend helped her with her stroller. She looked really relieved. The other people who were there just stared at us like we were some kinda superheroes, as if it was so hard to help her out~! They then walked through the door without even saying thank you. *sigh*

Most of the time i hold doors open for people. I think if you see them you should hold the do for them. I live in a city that has lots of paths to walk and people are always saying hi and smiling. I think we should all remeber it the little things people remember.

I always hold the door for others and I like to smile as a way of saying hello, but not to strangers. I'm in China and I find holding the door for someone is not a custom here. Many people just don't pay attention to these details. Boys or men may hold the door for their girlfriends. But that's it. I hope that doesn't mean we Chinese are rude in general.

Well our family still holds the doors for people...it is just common curtesty...and I don't think it is old fashioned at all....You are right people need to learn thier manners again....and this world would not be in the state it is...

Well it does stll happen a lot here in the UK and Europe in general, and I am glad of it. To my mind, holding a door open isn't a sexist act or anything of that nature, it is just basic good manners, and people who can't be bothered are just rude and discourteous in my opinion. I was also bought up to be polite by my parents - hlding doors for people was just part of it.

Well I must be old fashioned as well. I always hold the door. I think that it is totally rude if I didnt, I would be so embarrassed I just couldnt do it. I suppose I was brought up with respect. But I have had the door slammed in my face too.

I come from a small town and it is nothing to hold doors open for each other. Whether you are male or female 14 years old or 80 years old. We just hold the door open for each other. Also it isn't anything crazy to help people carry their groceries to the car or to stop your car and let people cross the street. It's just being a good person. After all our families have all lived here for YEARS. We all know each other or are somehow connected through work, relatives, marriage, friends, organizations, or social groups.

Good manners never go out of style. If a person is rude, it's not because manners are passe, it's just because that person is rude. I always say thanks to those who don't hold the door for me. Sometimes I get a dirty look, but sometimes I get an apology. It just reminds people to be kind to others. It's the little things that make this world a better place to live in, not the grand gestures.

I think there are a lot of people out there that are rude like that now. But, don't lose hope there is still a good portion of us who are like you and have the traditional manners that we have all been taught.