50 is Just Another Number
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
United States
June 30, 2007 9:54am CST
In 30 days I will turn 50 years old. Many people I have spoken to regarding turning 50 have said that it was one of the hardest ages for them to get a grip on. What is age? Why do people dwell on aging and think of it as a downer?
I look at 50 as a year older than 49. What does 50 feel like? How do you describe 50? Is it colorful? Is it rough in texture? What does 50 smell like? What the hell does it matter? It is a number.
With the next 50 years I hope to travel a bit. I want to visit areas outside of New England where I have spent 99.9% of my life. One day I want to visit places in Europe. My husband is from Holland and it is one place that I will visit with him. Denmark, England, France and Italy would be nice places to see too.
I want to get a tattoo. A butterfly on my right ankle with the initiials of my children under it. Purple would be the color I choose for the butterfly. Now this will be difficult for me because I don't like needles. Being a frugal person, I will find it hard to cough up the $50-$75 for the cost of the tattoo.
Having been a fluffy person for most of my adult life, I doubt I will ever be that 120 lb person that I once was. But, I would like to get my body in better shape. I need to get my butt to the gym and give it a workout. My job is physical and I do move about much more than I have in years, but it doesn't replace an aerobic workout.
Allowing myself to give myself happiness is something that I need to work on. I want to be happier. I need to gift myself things that bring me more joy. Connecting with my family and friends needs to become a priority. Although I have managed to spend more time with them than I have in past years, I want to spend more time with them. Spending time with family and friends bring me great joy.
We all need to take time to breathe, to stop and look around us at the sheer beauty of our surroundings. Fifty is a number, nothing more.
11 people like this
28 responses
@raychill (6525)
• United States
30 Jun 07
One, I like that you called yourself "fluffy".
Two, My mom is 53 and she has 3 tattoos. Her first one was at 30, her second in her 40's and her last one was about when she was 50.
Three, I'm 25. I had a hard time turning 25. Being that I've only been 25 for one month exactly today, I guess in truth I'm still having a hard time dealing with 25. It's hard to explain why. I never cared turning any other age. Not 13, omg TEEN! Not 16, OMG Drive! (That's when I got my first tattoo!). Not 18 OMG LEGAL ADULT! Not 21 OMG I can Drink (legally!). No. The only age I cared about turning was 25. To me 25 is really an adult. At 25 you're out of your college years (unless you're extended your college years). You've had some fun days and young days and irresponsible days and at 25 to me it's when you should REALLY be a responsible grown up. Just, be able to take care of yourself. Not be a slacker. Not be dependent on other people for things. Just ... be yourself and be responsible. That's what it is to me and that's scary.
Everyone was like "wait till you turn 30. Wait till you turn 50. wait till you turn this or that" and I'm just ... I'm not freaking out about those ages. To me...25 is when you should have come into your own and at 50... You've been your own person and you've lived and learned and you still have plenty of time to enjoy life and be who you want to be and do what you want.
It's true that age is only a number... it's how you present yourself that really matters.
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
30 Jun 07
Once you become an adult and life comes at you full force, the years speed by. We are so busy with making a living that we forget to live.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
30 Jun 07
When I turned twenty it was a hard day to get through. I was no longer a teen.
1 person likes this
@Makena1968 (682)
• United States
30 Jun 07
I loved your post. I'm going to be turning 60 next year, and I'm mentally preparing for that already. I've heard that our 60's can be like a rebirth of sorts. As long as I take care of myself, and make the right choices for myself now. My 50's were pretty rough. Menapause set in. There was an awful divorce, my children were still young (well one of them was, the other two were in high school and starting college). I hooked up with some real loser guys. I did get a tattoo..a bumblebee on my shoulder. Never regretted that. I also did come out of my shell I'd been in for almost 20 years (ironically because of one of those "loser" guys I dated for awhile). I did travel alot, overseas, to Mexico, and so on. You should watch that video "The Secret." I wish I would watched that on my 50th birthday. It may have saved me alot of heartache. Do that for yourself on your birthday. My family has been my shelter, too..I'm most happy when I'm with them. Do try and start your excercise program..get in the habit. It can be hard to start, but once you've gotten into it, it becomes a habit. So create good habits for yourself, now. It'll pay off in the long run and then some. Study other cultures and spiritual beliefs. Learn to meditate. I can't tell you how much that can benefit you. Take yoga classes at the Y. It's the beginning of your time, be good to yourself, and treasure your "alone" time. That's when you find yourself.
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
30 Jun 07
I plan on purchasing "The Secret" for myself. Others have offered their book for me to read, but I want to own a copy for myself.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160708)
• United States
30 Jun 07
Any age is a wonderful age to be, and that is a quote from someone else, probably from a greeting card. I plan to live to 100, so fifty is halfway there. I like being "iny 50's" I am just a tad older than you. Like you, I need to do nice things for my body, like you, I want to be able to travel. 50 can be a kind of freedom, no little kids at home.Not really any schooling to acquire. I would like to do some more travelling in the states, and I will. Inspite of our current financial crisis, I feel a postivity welling up in me that tells me I will be able to do some things that I want to do.Fifty just basically slipped up on me, and slid on by.
2 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
1 Jul 07
I remember just a couple of years ago I would joke about turning 50. Now that is it beating a path to my front door, I was afraid to open it. Now I embrace it.
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
1 Jul 07
" Why do people dwell on aging and think of it as a downer?"
Ya know I have to wonder if many ppl dwell on it so much and see getting older as a bad thing because in todays world most ppl are so concerned with the material and whatnot they pretty much have been letting life pass them by..Very few ppl I know TRULY take the time to stop and enjoy just being, having quality time with family and friends, just enjoy life ya know....My husband has a terrible habit of that, he worries about tomorrow, dwells on the yrs gone and tends to forget about the today and the here and now ya know....I on the otherhand, live day by day and appreciate the little htings in life like just being able to function on my own get out of bed in the morning on my own, breathing without assistance and so on....Having a hot meal, a roof over my head, wonderful kids, a great husband and friends that love me/us (and I/we them) unconditionally ya know...
Ppl are so busy busy busy working, buying, doing, rushing they forget to jsut stop and breathe.....I honestly believe thats why getting older is so hard for so many..
2 people like this
@mollylh (78)
• United States
30 Jun 07
I dunno. I will be 58 in a couple of weeks. And I work with girls that are in their 30's. I feel all right towards them, but whenever I overhear them talking about me I hear them call me "This LADY I work with", not "this girl I work with"! I call them girls. Now that stings OUCH. Lady. But I feel better than I did in my 30's or 40's. I don't have any youngsters to chase, if my house isn't clean, so what? I thank God I have a house that is almost paid for! LOL I love my 50's. My husband and I are in excellent health, I quit smoking over 4 years ago. Now I treat myself to pedicures, manicures, designer handbags! LOL I love my age! It's true . . . you do mellow with age! And what my Mom always said holds true: If you have your health you have everything! Happy early birthday from one who has been there, done that! Like they say on "Six Feet Under": Any day Above Ground is a good day!"
@gunny685 (50)
• Mexico
30 Jun 07
I agree, age is just a number, I will be 60 years old next month! I say enjoy life, get that tatoo, you need to do what you want to do, not what everyone else thinks you should do. Have a big part on your birthday, celebrate the fact that you made it this far.
2 people like this
@hockeygal4ever (10021)
• United States
2 Jul 07
While I do agree with you, age is just a number, I think people pay so much attention to getting older because whether we like it or not it's a step closer to our end of life here on earth. I think a lot of people worry that life is ending for them and dwell on that. I personally see it as life is carrying on and each new year that brings with us age, also brings with us wisdom and experiences. I'd never want to go back to my twenties, I love being what I am now. So I think the majority of people that worry about age worry because they're not happy with what they've done or become.
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
6 Jul 07
Life can end when we least expect it to. It is how we live up until the day we die that is most important.
@smacksman (6053)
•
1 Jul 07
Your next turning point will be when you retire from work - whatever number that will be is not important. In fact you are right, numbers mean nothing.
So you retire and have the time to do things and the next hurdle is when the body starts to pack up at say 70. So looking at it this way you have 5 to 10 years to really do things. And you now have 10 years or so to lick your body into shape to enjoy retirement because retirement is an enerjetic lifestyle.
You must make a positive move though because you may have noticed how the years slip bye and if you relax too much, 5 years rush bye before you know it.
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
6 Jul 07
I doubt I will ever be able to afford to retire. With the economy the way it is, I may be able to retire when I am 80.
@eaforeman6 (8979)
• United States
2 Jul 07
I am doing more now at 51 then I did when I was young. I have a very full life. I think you can be very happy and feel great when alittle maintence. Age will only limit you if you let it....I tell myself that I can do things and I just do them. I work fulltime, swim everyday and keep house ect....I try to add joy and good things everyday...Let the music play....best wishes friend.
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
3 Jul 07
I often tell people that they shouldn't say they are having a bad day when if they really think about it, there is some good to be found.
@spiritwolf52 (2300)
•
30 Jun 07
I didn't find 50 difficult at all. You are only as old as you feel. Well, if that is the case then I am quite young yet! We do a bit of travelling and I love to hike. We just pack the dogs in the car and off we go.
@maribea (2366)
• Italy
5 Jul 07
oh you are right...50 is a number but birthdays are good moments to sit down and think about our lives and what we are doing and what we desire and really want..so I am happy to hear all the things you want to do and I wish all your dreams will come true..Moreover, I am here sending you my best wishes for your birthday and i hope you will find the time to come here and make a post on your birthday so to let all your friends here join in a big..."Happy Birthday". and of course you have to coem to Italy once in your life!!! It is such a beautiful country!!! Well, of course, there is a little conflict of interests with me..because I am Italian...but, indeed, Italy is worth a stop!!!
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
6 Jul 07
Italy is one of the places where I wish to visit one day. My husband has visited your country and was enthralled with it and often tells me of how much he would love to take me there and show me the places that has visited. Thank you for your comments. Huggers to you.
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
8 Aug 08
I got the same song and dance when I turned 40 in June. Everyone kept telling me to lie and say I was 39...I don't. I'm proud to have made it to 40...not everyone does. I don't know how long I'll live but I try to enjoy the time I have.
**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
9 Aug 08
Wow, has it been a year already? I am now 51. Feel the same!
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
1 Jul 07
Hi Butterfly,
I absolutely love your Avatar and the slogan and have asked you to be a friend because of it. I also like the nature of your discussions. My mom loved butterflies and she passed away 2 years ago and whenever I see butterflies I think of her.
Anyway, on to your discussion.I saw yours after posting an age related question on my site. My question was, "How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?" To me age has nothing to do with anything. It marks how many times we've been around the sun..period. It says nothing about who we are, how we live or what makes everyone unique.
I quit buying into the 'age defining' way of looking at my life after turning forty. I made up my mind then that every decade afterwards would lead me closer to living life on my own terms...in an ageless sense of my body and mind. I plan for fifty to be fabulous, sixty to be sensational, seventy to be sublime, eighty to to expansive, ninety to be 'nifty' and if I make it to 100 I'll figure out a descriptor then.
In my youth I had two eating disorders and was very externally driven. At this point in my life I am more internally thoughtful and am happier, healthier and more thankful to be alive...and aging than I ever was in my youth. I live by two mottos...You are only young once...but can be a kid forever. The other one is--growing old is mandatory...growing up is an option! Works for me.
Hope your 50th birthday brings more of everything you wish for yourself! Celebrate life..we wouldn't be here without it!
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
1 Jul 07
Well thank you my new friend. Life is a celebration and I intend to celebrate much and often.
@Polly1 (12645)
• United States
30 Jun 07
50 is a great number, I have 4 more years to go. I haven't had any problems with my age number going up. I think its funny, the years fly by. It seems like yesturday I was in high school. I think back and wonder how did so many years go be so quick. I enjoy my life overall. The best years are yet to come.........
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
30 Jun 07
We tend to wish our life away. I couldn't wait to be 13, 18, 25. It seems that once I hit 18 the years flew by.
1 person likes this
@jennybianca (12912)
• Australia
5 Jul 07
I will tell you in eight months time what 50 feels like.
I don't anything much will change for me then. Changes are more likely to occur for me in anopther two years time, when my daughter gets her drivers license. That will give me a lot more freedom. Then, in 5 years time my step son will be 18, & I hope will be off our hands completely. That will leave my step daughter, still anotjher 9 years to go, but I suspect there will be custdy changes before she turns 18.
@villageanne (8553)
• United States
20 Aug 08
Sounds like you have the right attitude. I am not far behind you in age. I am 48 and closing in rapidly on that big 50. LOL I feel my age though. LOL
@wachit14 (3595)
• United States
30 Jun 07
Welcome to my world. You are in good company. This is what I know about going into the second half of my life (I do plan on living to one hundred); I feel far less burdened with what other people think about me and much more interested in what I think about myself. I really am pursuing my dreams right now and I am more excited about the future than I've been for the last twenty-five years. So, do get your tattoo, do travel and do explore any and all possibilities. It really is now or never and frankly, I like it better this way.
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
1 Jul 07
What we think of ourself is most important. Besides myself, I have only God's judgement to worry about. My mother worries that when I go to Europe that I will never return. She needn't worry, I will return. My home is with my family. For as long as I can remember I have wanted to travel afar. But, when you travel you always return home.
@canjo13317 (396)
• United States
3 Jul 07
LOL my wife was just busting on me about this. i'll be 50 in 2 1/2 yrs. she likes to point out all the good things, like the senior discounts, the special 50+ programs offered, etc. ain't she a peach? lol oh, she's 36.
@flotownwoman (23)
• United States
30 Jun 07
lol! Loved your post! I just turned the big six-oh this past May...I must say...it hurt abit...not mentally, just physically. Mentally I will always be young and most all of my friends are 15-20 years younger than I...I love their energy! Longevity runs in my family on both sides, so I figure I have at least 30 or 40+ years to go...better figure it out...am going through a separation right now...I wanted it...but now, it is soooo quiet and I am having a hard time being with myself even though I have a lot of hobbies...I am unable to work due to a disability so that means less income and it takes $ to even be sociable these days. Turning 50 was kind of thrilling because I realized I had lived a half a century!
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
1 Jul 07
Congratulations on your turning 60! It is proven that people are living longer lives than ever before. Living to be 100 is possible. Many of my clients are in their 90's and living on their own.
