Can You Honestly Be Friends With Someone You Have Been Intimate With?

I can see where you are coming from. As much as I would like to agree that you can't be friends with someone that you have intimate with. I have to disagree somewhat. Now most of my ex's that I have been intimate with I could careless to see again yet alone be friends with. But this is were the disagreement somewhat comes in. My last ex happens to be my son's father. So obiviously we were intimate. Now that we have put the past behind us we are great friends. It doesn't bother me in the least. When we first split it was hard and I didn't want to see him, but we had a son together and that helped us get past it all and become friends for the sake of our son. I wish you the best of luck and hope things get better for you.

Out of all the relationships I have been in (and there haven't been that many LOL) I think I have remained friends with two of them. I mean we don't keep in contact but if we do bump into each other we do say hi and talk for a while, see how each other is doing and thats about it. As for the others, nada and i think i prefer to keep it that way especially if we didn't end it nicely LOL. Some people can do it though, i have a friend who is still friends with her ex even after he cheated on her. Not sure how she does it but she sure is strong and probably has forgiven him and left it as friends. As for you it must be hard living in the same apartment block. I might be tempted to move LOL but then again why should you? if you both get along like civilised adults then it shouldn't be a problem... unless he becomes more than friends again LOL

You know, I really believe it is based on the maturity of the people involved and the situations that the people went through. One of my best friends is a girl that I dated for a year and we haven't missed a beat as good friends. We were good friends before we dated and got intimate, and we remain great friends to this day. My wife and her have even gotten to be great friends. I think it works both ways, though. My high school girlfriend was a friend after we dated, but she would keep trying to get back together with me and trying to re-kindle a relationship that wasn't really there. So she was not able to get past the intimacy and be friends, something that we did fine prior to dating. It's a matter of maturity. If you can handle it, then it's a piece of cake.

Well why bother with the Brackets? Do you like the guy, or do you love him? Its as simple as that! If you like him and you sleep with him, then your a "Loose Lady". If you Love him and sleep with him your his "Lover." So which do you choose?

Yes, this is possible. I know for I have done it. We agreed at the beginning to remain monogamous and if either one of us wanted to end it that we'd be honest with each other. Our friendship had been developed before intimacy set in and was important to us both. Unfortunatly, it was him that after 6 years and not one single argument, decided he wanted to date others. I was devastated and hurt. I loved him so much! At first it was impossible to be around him. He understood and backed off for about a year. We had no contact. One day he showed up unexpectedly at my house. I was so glad to see him! We are still best of friends and no longer intimate. He drops by now and then for coffee and never ever forgets a birthday or holiday. He is a wonderful person. Actually, I am friends with most of my exes. The key is to end it before it gets bitter and hurtful.

It really is difficult to commit into a relationship such as that. Trying to stay friends with someone you've recently had an intimate relationship with is rather impossible if those feelings for him still linger. You do not and should not commit into this type of relationship if you are not comfortable with it. It is best that you do what is possible for you to stay away from him and to focus on you and only you. He should be understanding and respectful to whatever decision you make about your relationship with him if he truly considers you a friend.

I belive that u can - or actually I know that u can or atleast I can =) I am friends with a few and it is working good. Ofcourse I have a bf now so there is no chanse that I would ever fall back and sleep with any of them again - but we can be friends =) I am sure that it is harder if you still have feelings for the guy..

i can understand it is very tough to be friend with someone whom you realy love but you can give it a try and see what happens but this will take a time for you to come up from it but still it will get normal with time

I think over time that you could be friends with him. But for right now, you do have the problem of trying to forget about him and at the same time running into him so often. Maybe you could tell him that you need time away from him and that includes him visiting you when he is lonely. Make your feelings plain to him. I don't think it would be rude if you ignored him for a while considering the circumstances. I would move away as a last resort.

I think it's a very individual thing, and it depends very much on the personalities and emotional maturity of the people involved. For most people, it probably wouldn't be possible. I was friends with a woman for almost 10 years... and then we suddenly both ended up being divorced around the same time, and since we'd kinda had a "secret crush" on each other for all that time, we ended up dating and having a relationship... before deciding that we really had better chemistry as friends, than as lovers. So we went back to being friends... and that DID work. We still stay in touch (Thank God for email!) even though we now live over 2000 miles apart. But I think that situation is an exception, rather than the norm.

its possible but that tension is always there some cannot be trusted to not try it again and again i try to keep my relationships with men with no more romps in the hay but sometimes if you are vulnerable and lonely it just happens

I can understand your situation and know what are you going through..its becomes difficult to forget that guy with whom you are intimate as he stays near by you... Don't force yourselves into freindship with this person when ou can't be freindly...Try to avoid him as much as possible and be busy in your work so that his thoughts doesn't run through your mind...If possible change your location as you mentioned...It works...All the best dear freind..

I think you are right. Though I think some people cam be friends after a relationship it rarely works out. And in this situation it sounds like he is just wanting to keep you as a back burning thing when they have a spat again. Is he there when you need a friend, or does he help you out or is this friendship one sided where when he needs something he comes to you? If he is just a nice guy who is a good friend then maybe try but from the sounds of it I would move on or out. Good Luck!

The thing with becoming friends with someone that you were intimate with is that your other non-intimate friends will never understand what the magnitism is between y ou and your ex/love. I was dating this guy about 2 years ago, and we were fine, we had an arguement, quite big really, i told him what i thought of him and his affection dysfunction, didnt see him for a year and he came back to me and told me that i was right, i had affected him for the enitre year that we didn't see one another. to this day, we share something close, yes, we still act like we are together, infact i feel married to him sometimes minus the bedroom fun, however when we catch up we are snuggle buddies. No intamacy any more, we havent got that attraction, mere friends with snuggle benefits. We still hang out with our friends and stuff, but i believe that you can still be a friend with those that you have been intimate with based on you had a connection when you first met, and that connection will always over power your lighter judgement.

That would be a "no". I have attempted to be friends with guys that I used to date and it ended badly. They all still wanted a romantic relationship and I kept saying "no".

I think it varies from person to person to be honest. I sometimes talk to my ex-fiance and he has a kid now. I am glad it did not turn out to be me with the kid and divorced from him. I would not date him again for the life of me nor would I hang out with him, but I am ok with talking to him every now and then.

Yes, of course, most times unless their weird or something. My exgirlfriend is one of my best friends in the world.

you should know new friends to keeping your life