Wow talk about petty jealousies.
By devilsangel
@devilsangel (1817)
United States
July 2, 2007 9:18am CST
Ok so over the weekend I helped a friend move from his place to his gf's place. Well while doing this his gf and I got to talking, you know how us women do. Well turns out we get along wonderfully. We did more talking then packing to be honest. We got on the converstation of work verses staying at home. Her and I both are "domestic engineers" right now lol. Anyway a few others where there helping and wow did their jealous streak come out during this converstation. As soon as we began the comment from his friends wife was well it must be nice to sit at home and not have to work. We both looked at her like she'd lost her damn mind. So for everyone who is under the misconception that those of us who take care of the day to day needs of running a house don't work lets fix that now.
First off my job is a 24/7 job, I don't get vaction, I get little to no compisation for it and more stress than working a normal 9-5. I am a cook,a maid,an accountant, a counselor, a doctor, a nurse, a mother, a referee, the lost and found person, and if time permiting a lover. I don't get a day off because I'm tired, and I can't call in sick.
So for all of those out there who hold this job along with me kudos to you. For everyone who doesn't appreicate them for what they do, I suggest you stay home for a week and give it a try. By the next week you'll be begging to go back to your precious 9-5.
7 people like this
11 responses
@KrazyKlingon (5005)
• United States
3 Jul 07
Sndcain posted something about that a while ago right here on MyLot.
http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1050368.aspx
Too bad you did not see that discussion, because you could have thrown that 138,000 number back in their faces.
2 people like this
@devilsangel (1817)
• United States
4 Jul 07
Well hell I think I'm gonna go swing over there and check it out :)
1 person likes this
@sunshinecup (7871)
•
2 Jul 07
Oh man, you hit it on the nail!!! Hubby will tell anyone that makes comments about me not working, to get real. He wouldn't trade me jobs if his life depended on it. In fact when I did have a job, I actually did less work in a day than I do now, it's never flipping ending. No it's not nice, I don't lay on the couch eating bon bons all day while watching soaps. No, I am battling traffic to get those groceries that I'm going to unload, put up and then latter cook. I am cleaning that toilet so my family doesn't get sick, right before I have a quick sandwich and then pick up those same darn toys I just picked 5 minutes ago. Then I’m finding hubby’s keys, my daughter shoes, all the while trying to answer the phone. I mean I could go on and on.
I say to those that thinks we stay at home moms have it made, don’t be jealous, get a clue and then get real.
1 person likes this
@devilsangel (1817)
• United States
2 Jul 07
As I'm writing this response I have a load running in the washer, another in the dryer, and I just got finished unloading the dishwasher. After I finish replying here I've got to go log onto my schools website, turn in my assignments that are due today, log back off, load the dishwasher, finish the laundry, get stuff out for dinner, run to walmart, come home and try and get some type of a nap before 3 if at all possible. Its amazing how easy we have it ROTFLMAO.
2 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
3 Jul 07
LOL its amazing how well we manage to multi-task isnt it....
1 person likes this
@4cuteboys (4099)
• United States
4 Jul 07
I agree and this happens alot! When my mom was working and I was staying home with the kids (like i am now, except she quit to stay home!), she would always call me "lady of leisure" and whatever. HUUUMMM..I cant remember the last time the word leisure and me were in the same stratosphere. haha. 4 kids is sooo not leisure time. haha. I cook sometimes, clean, fix stuff, replace batteries, take care of the garden, watch 4 kids and what not and I am lady of leisure. I think not!
1 person likes this
@HighReed1 (1126)
• United States
7 Jul 07
I always say that days of rest for mothers are like unicorns....you hear about them all the time, but you never see them! :)
@mari_skye (1637)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
I have always admired women who choose to stay at home because I don't think I can do it. As you have mentioned above, staying at home is not an easy task. My friends and I have talked about this topic when she was about to get married, we were agreeing on the fact that we did not like to stay at home. We wanted to start a family but we also wanted to keep our career life. Not that we look down on stay at home but because we wanted to experience both worlds.
1 person likes this
@HighReed1 (1126)
• United States
4 Jul 07
I was on both sides of the street as well. I was a stay-at-home mom, a working mom and now I'm a working mom with an empty-nest syndrome.
I know all too well the job you can never leave. I would love for someone to do what I do! Then I would get to rest a few minutes when I get home...LOL
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
3 Jul 07
Well put! I could have written your words years ago my girls were younger. With the cost of day care even then it really did not pay me to go out and work and pay a sitter for 3 young children. I quit my job and stayed home. For extra cash, I did babysit for some other children. I had never and still never have worked harder than i did in those days! I rarely had time or energy for friends and I certainly never "just lounged around". Kudos to you and all moms that chose this path. It is hardest job in the world and least appreciated. The payoff will come years later when your children are grown and you see what fine individuals you sent out into the world.
1 person likes this
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
3 Jul 07
"First off my job is a 24/7 job, I don't get vaction, I get little to no compisation for it and more stress than working a normal 9-5. I am a cook,a maid,an accountant, a counselor, a doctor, a nurse, a mother, a referee, the lost and found person, and if time permiting a lover. I don't get a day off because I'm tired, and I can't call in sick."
HELL YA!!! aint that the truth!! LOL my husband learned the hard way what its like to be a stay at home parent..During the first yr of our relationship he sent me to St.Lucia for a week to visit family and he took the week off and stayed with my kids..LOL to this day he still comments on how he doenst know how i do it every day LOL Of course the kids were only 2 and 4 at the time so you KNOW they were a handful LOL...
I get seriously annoyed at ppl who take on that attitude - that SAHM pretty much sit around and do nothing - not only do we do all the jobs you mentioned (and then some) but we have to do them all at once so to speak....Its not like goin into an office job and doing ONLY the required work (answering the phones, filing papers, taking notes for example)...We have to manage juggling all of it at once....And there are other things too that go on the list like
seamstress
handyman/woman
taxi service (I dont worry about that one though LOL)
gardener
secretary
party planner
private shopper
and the list goes on....not to mention ppl tend to think that SAHM are ONLY caring for the child/children when in all reality we are in charge of the entire home/family....I'd love to see a naysayer come to my house and take over for a week....I have 2 kids who are boy and girl and very close in age NOT TO MENTION going through teenage angst/hormonal changes and so on (those two can take up an entire day just in counseling alone when things are "off" for them), a fair sized house to upkeep and 6 pets to care for and a husband to keep fed and sane....and you are so right it IS a 24/7 job with no vacation/sick days/time and a half let alone pay at all/holidays off etc etc..
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
3 Jul 07
Although i really agree with you that staying at home is hard work and has no monetary compensation, I need to point out that those of us that work away from home still have to do the same things that you do after coming home from out out of home work.
Maybe sometimes we are so tired that we try to cheat a bit, still everything needs ot be done either we are staying at home or not.
That's probably what those other women were talking about.
Before I leave home for work I already worked at home making lunches - and sometimes I even cook because my soon is not too keen on sandwiches - made the beds, did some fast clean up, wake up the kids , make sure they eat their breakfast, chit chat with them a bit, feed and walk the dog, and a few more things.
Then I go out and do my day's work just to come back and do some more cleaning or tidying up, check and pay bills, help kids with homework, listen to what they have to say if they need to talk, cook,clean some more, take care of anything that needs it, etc etc etc
I'm not taking any value of what you do during your day, it's a never ending job filled with responsibilities and as you say there is no pay, no sick days and very little praise.
What I'm saying is maybe it was not petty jealousy. When we work outside the home we still have to do the same chores you do before and after we go out to work, and that's probably what they were thinking about.
@devilsangel (1817)
• United States
3 Jul 07
I've been on both side of the scale. I've worked full time and rasied 2 kids on my own. The woman that was talking to me has only recently been married and has no children. She's mad because she says that we are spoiled becasue we don't have to work. Because her and her husband both need to work to make ends meet she thinks we have it easy because we don't have to go out into the work force and find jobs. Frankly I wanted to smack her, but instead I just told her off.
2 people like this
@nageswari75 (675)
•
2 Jul 07
Oh dear,tell me all about it.I mean,what do we "not" do for someone who is not monetarily employed??I get tired of all these stares that I get from my relatives when I tell them I am a stay at home mom.I bet no one has to do all the things I do here!Back in India,one can employ maids for doing regular chores like dishwashing,washing clothes and even help in cooking.But nothing like that in US or UK.I mean,you can employ part time services but they are too expensive for me atleast.And I have a 3 yr old running around all the time behind me.
1 person likes this
@vicki2876 (5636)
• Canada
3 Jul 07
Hear Hear! I agree with you completely! It is way harder to be a full time parent (mom of three) then it is to go to work 9-5. My man doesn't do anythng once he is off work and the weekend are his breaks too. Now yes he does work hard and has a physically demanding job but still when do I get my "time off" Never a nice bath to wind down can at any moment be interupted by a kids arguement or someone needing the bathroom. Congrats to all you hard working full time domestic engineers!!