creating happy endings
giving up on life
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students and teachers in the sharing circle of lif
Were you ever at a point of giving up on life---but didn't? What happened?
@Perspectives (7131)
Canada
July 3, 2007 10:05pm CST
This may seem like a heavy topic...and in some ways it is. But I am like most people I love happy endings and that is why I decided to post this discussion. The idea began for me last night just before I signed off.
I checked out pywacket's site to respond to another matter and saw his plea to pray for a Mylot member who was giving up on life. The outpouring of love, compassion and support was very moving and added some positivity to the hauntingly sad words of the person in need.
When I went to bed last night I (like other members who had responded)prayed and sent the distressed person love and light to guide them through their dark hour. As I contemplated their circumstances it took me back to times where I was at the same point of giving up on life. There were a few times I came very close to doing it. During that phase I could not conceive...much less believe that life could be different. I still recall the hopeless, helpless feelings that made me want to leave because I saw no other way to end the pain.
Now when I think back to those time it is still very sobering. Had I ended my life I would have missed so much. As I healed my own life doors have opened up for me to share what I learned (and continue to learn) with others. I am a life coach, group leader, public speaker and free lance writer. My work focuses on all aspects of healthy living and it is a gift that keeps on giving.
I clearly know one thing for sure...we are all students and teachers to each other along the discovery trails we call life. We need each other's experiences and wisdom to assist us in finding our answers and that is why Mylot and other sites of this calibre are wonderful...they are an on-line sharing circle.
So I was wondering if any other brave souls would be willing to share your experiences when you were on the 'edge of brokeness' and what you did to come back from it. Did someone assist you...or did you soldier on and find your own answers? What valuable life lessons did you learn that you might want to offer?
In closing let us not forget to be the candle in the darkness for those who are depressed, sad, lonely and maybe even at the point of giving up on life like the person who reached out 4 to the Mylot community days ago.
8 people like this
10 responses
@saralee1 (1983)
• United States
4 Jul 07
When I was 17, I was forbidden to see the man I had actually given my virginity too. My mother didn't like "him" and I did. I didn't know how to tell her that I had lost my virginity to him, and she didn't ask, it was like she didn't care, and only wanted to make my life as dark as hers was.
he wanted to take me away, and marry me. but he was forced to leave, after she called the cops, even though he was persistent. You know, I tried to forget that day.
I went to the kitchen,and grabbed whatever pills were in the cabinet, and took a cocktail of them.
Somehow, I lived. I woke up three days later, extremely cold. All I remember, is voices in my dreams trying to comfort me, telling me regardless of what my parents did, I would soon be free to be my own person.
I cannot tell you how harmful it was,to be torn away from my true love. My father arrived shortly thereafter, and took me to another state. I never saw him again, and slowly he faded from my memory, since my family did not want me anywhere near him. Now, my parents are gone, and I am afraid he is too, because you see, he suffered from a brain tumor. He didn't have long to live, and that was so long ago.
3 people like this
@tseavellanosa (52)
• Philippines
4 Jul 07
Right now, I am feeling that way too....i want to give up. I feel hopeless, my mom is having trouble right now and there's nothing I can do for her. I want to help her in everything I can but I feel so worthless. I am reaching out to you, specially to those who are in Canada to hire me as a nanny, so I can bring my family there and help my mom financially, I am presently working here in the Phillipines and working abroad will definitely benefits us.Please, hire me...all i need is an employer.
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
tseavellanosa---my heart goes out to you...and I am sorry to hear that you are feeling so overwhelmed by the circumstances in your life right now.
Why are you feeling worthless dear one...is it because you cannot help your mother? The fact that you are so loving and caring towards her and want so desperately to assist shows you are anything but worthless! Those qualities and the innate goodness of your spirit make you a wonderful part of this world. I am sure you have much to contribute even though you may not be able to see it right now.
I would hire you if I could. My hubby and I do not have children and do not therefore require a nanny. What I would suggest though is to contact Canadian Immigration and set the wheels in motion. Do you know how to put a resume of your past expereinces, hobbies, interests and anything else that could show an employer why you would be a good employee.
Please do not give up on yourself...or your life. I wrote in my posting if I had taken my life when I felt there was no hope I would not be enjoying what I have. Maybe you could post your desire for employment on Mylot and see if anyone else is in a position to help you find work.
Keep in touch, I am sending you warm and loving regards. You are not alone there are many who care here...just keep reaching out and looking for answers and direction...they will come.
2 people like this
@tseavellanosa (52)
• Philippines
4 Jul 07
thank you very much for reading and responding to me...it really uplifts me at least I know there is still someone out there who still wants to help.
Ma'am, if there's a friend of yours who wants a nanny, please refer me to her/him...last month I visited a canadian immigration here and they already processed our papers but they say it will take 4 years if I do not have employer. Anyway, if you have a friend, please refer me madam.....
thank you very much and God bless...
3 people like this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
You are welcome. I have requested you as a friend and if you accept e-mails can be exchanged. I hope you will keep giving yourself credit for each good thing you do. You are striving to improve life for your husband and other family members and that is very worthwhile.
The fact that you have your papers in order is good. I would suggest that you make a list of your experiences, jobs, people you have worked for. Maybe they would be willing to give you written references. It is good to have those kinds of things on hand rather than scrambling around after the fact. Gather as much information to support who you are and what you do...it will make finding employement easier.
My thoughts and prayers are with you..and we will keep in touch. You can e-mail me on this matter rather than waiting for discussion postings. I am on mylot at different times during the day...but do pick up messages even if I am not active in discussions.
Blessings dear one.
2 people like this
@saurabh_5b (81)
• India
4 Jul 07
basically all of us follow the same life cycle , schooling , goin to college , takin degree and gettin a job and family...but the meaning of life comes out of the self realizatipn in this processs....and every individual in his life contributes something that affects the world in a smaller or bigger way,.....
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
5 Jul 07
Yes, that is true...we are all part of a bigger whole and more connected than we realize at times.
1 person likes this
@mommy20212004 (350)
• United States
5 Jul 07
I had a period in the winter of 2003 where I just didn't want to get out of bed and at times even felt like driving my car off of a bridge. About 2 weeks before Christmas my entire family was evicted from our house and the bank foreclosed on us. The worst part about it all was that the only one who knew that this was going to happen was my mom. She had been skipping out on the mortgage payments for 6 months without telling anyone. After this happened I went into a great depression and it seemed like I would never get out of it. Luckily I found out that I was pregnant with my baby girl, and I suddenly remembered that I had a husband and children that needed me to get through this. We now own our own home (no more sharing with anyone) and we're doing great. I hope I never have to go through a period of depression like that again.
2 people like this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
5 Jul 07
Wow, that is some story of recovery and redemption and I appreciate hearing about it. Your daunting experiences and how you came through them illustrates how important it is not to give up when things seem bleak and hopeless.
Everything cycles and changes eventually. The hard part for most of us is to remember that when we are in the middle of a crisis. It is good to hear that you have a beautiful girl and other children to enhance your life and that you are doing great. Who knows maybe some other Mylot family will benefit from your story. Having hope that things will work out can be the one thing that can pull people out of a nose-dive of depression.
May you and yours continue to have the blessings you now enjoy...you sure deserve it!
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
5 Jul 07
Hi Phonce
Sorry to miss out on the one thing that makes you strong and firm...if you care to add the rest of it I'd love to hear what it is.
1 person likes this
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
It is good to know that you have never come close to 'crossing that bridge' and I hope you never have to.
Your comment on the discussion is appreciated. It is nice to hear all 'perspectives.'
2 people like this
@good1030 (670)
• China
4 Jul 07
sometimes i think living a life is just like doing an assignment, parents give you birth, and grow you up, after that when your parents become older and older, you will take care of them, and at the same time you give your child birth and then grow them up, then you will turn old, and your child will take care of you just like what you did to your parents, and he/she will have his/her child and just repeat the same things... when you pass away, you complete your mission..
2 people like this
@healwell (1268)
• Ahmedabad, India
4 Jul 07
You have explain so long... It's ok to me, I can uerstand these things because I have stopped 3 persons doing this giving up the life thing! They are still living with a meaningful life and as far as financial things are concerned, they are really doing better than me also!
I know the moment one person thinks and some time does it. One of my writer friend has did it before 2 years after having a good life, but financial matters lead him for that and he even did not asked or explained to friends, whom he met day before he took the step to give up life!
So I compared these two happenings to analyse the thing for those who have had provided to give up idea for second thought and they gave up the idea of giving up life and live till the date and one who had really a good life as a writer and as a person too but for some kind of financial crisis lead him strangely for giving up the life, though his writings were humourous and full of positive attitud!
Well, I hope that prayer did the positive work for the person and life will smile for hi,...
@Perspectives (7131)
• Canada
4 Jul 07
Hello again,
What an amazing thing to have been able to provide the kind of support that prevented 3 people from taking their own life. They must have trusted you and whatever you did to intervene.
On the other hand it is unfortunate that financial pressures pushed your other friends over the edge. At least there is the legacy of the humourous, positive writings...some do not even leave that behind.
I also hope the prayers assisted the person I wrote about. I checked in and one Mylot user said they had responded to something in the last day or so. Hopefully the prayer support will provide enough light within the shadows to guide them to another place.
2 people like this
@Bizziebod (3497)
•
6 Jul 07
I've been there on a few occasions, where life is so black, you don't want to go on. I'd prefer not to go into the why's and wherefores but let's just say it was men related.. My daughter kept me going, the thought of leaving her alone in this world stopped me several times and if it wasn't for her I doubt I would be here now.
1 person likes this
@sandwedge (1339)
• Malaysia
4 Jul 07
i did once. i almost ended it all but the last moment i remembered i have forgotten to pay the cable bill.
1 person likes this
