As to what extent will you allow your husband to decide for you?

To no extent do I let my husband decide for me. My husband and I often do make decisions together, or base decisions upon who whatever we are discussing is more important to (my keeping my name was more important to me than my taking his name was to him, for example). However, in no instance would I bow to his wishes simply because he is the male in the relationship, and I certainly wouldn't let him decide who my friends were going to be. If there were a specific friend of mine that he didn't trust, I would hear his reasons for not trusting that person, and consider them when making a decision about my relationship with that friend, but I wouldn't give his opinions more weight than my own.

lol i've never heard of that as a "main ingrediant." In fact I think that's a way to ruin a relationship, a marriage should be 50/50, not one person acting like a Godly tyrant over the other. My SO and I will make joint decisions that affect both our lives, but ultimatly i decide what to do for ME. If I want to go back to school to be a teacher, then i will. No matter what he said (it just so happens he supports me on it lol but i'm just using it as an example.) I don't think anyone should be the "ruler" int he relationship, that just seems unhealthy and abusive in a way. I think some women allow their husbands to do that cuz it's easier. It's easier to have someone working to earn u money while you sit home all day. It's easier to let him tell you what to do, because sometimes making decisins is scary or hard to make. Its sad really, she's not really *living* her life, she's just floating along as some sort of drone. :(

As a married person, I say one main ingredient for a successfull marriage is communications. My husband makes no major decisions without me, and nor do I. We may end up doing things the way he originally talked about, but not because he is the husband and I am being submissive, but because in some instances, his way of doing things turns out to be the best way. However, sometimes my way of doing things is better and we do it my way. I think it's a bit 1950's to say wives should be submissive. We make all decisions together, and I don't think there is anything wrong with that. Everyone gets discussed and decided on. Compromise is important, but communcation is of the upmost importance.

"Most married person would say that one main ingredient for successful marriage is to be submissive to your husband." Who the hell ever said that? That's pretty much a surefire road to becoming used, abused and unappreciated. I would never let my husband make decisions for me. Married or not I'm my own damn person, end of story. That just makes no sense to me at all.

The only time I am submissive to my husband's decisions is when it comes to things I know little about and he knows alot....electronics, cars, building things. My husband doesn't think highly of all my friends. The only thing he ever says is to watch the forwards from one of them as they have imbeds in them half the time. If I want to talk to them, no problem.

The only time my husband decides anything for my is when he goes and gets dinner and I don't know what I want other then that I make my own choices. He help pick out my clothes and what not but in the end everything I do is my choice. My mom for a short time was in a relationship like the person you know, she lost herself for a while. I think you should try to talk to her in a non threating way with out just saying she needs to leave him, try to tell her shes losing herself.

I've never in my whole life met anyone who would advise being submissive to a partner. Marriage is meant to be an equal partnership, if it is not the meeting of equal minds and with equal weight given to each others ideas, feelings, skills and aspirations then I think it is doomed to faliure. Women are not doormats, we are not there for our husbands to wipe their feet on!

I think a woman giving into her husband for the sake of peace is not the way any more, I think everything, every decision should be made by both parties and not automatically the way the man of the household wants...Marriage is team work...

I've never understood women as submissive wives. I wasn't raised that way, in fact my father raised me to be my own woman, have an education, make my own decisions and never EVER rely on any man, husband or not. Now with that said, I value my husband's opinions. And he values mine. We're a TEAM with no captain. And this pertains to everything in our family from money, to our friends, raising our children, everything. I do rely on my husband to support our family financially, but this was a joint decision. We both wanted one parent at home with our children (and we suffer financially for it sometimes!) But in no way, does my husband insist on this. If I decided that it was time for me to return to work, he would support it.