Dowry system should be stopped or no

i agree with you this dowry system should be stopped.i saw a comment here that dowry is decreasing in india.i dont think so .i know many marriages in my local place they demanded dowry.but now its something different from earlier.people never ask for dowry but girls parents should give him some "gifts"

Hello Sudha! I don't agree with you that dowry system is increasing day by day in India, instead it has decreased. But still in most of the parts of India, dowry system has become even fashion & prestige issue. As much as guys & their families are responsible for encouragement of dowry, girl & girl's families are also equally responsible if they agree to give dowry because if girls start refusing to give dowry, slowly dowry system would finish totally. About your friend...I think she should refuse that marriage proposal & find a job so that she can live independently. She may get better marriage proposals where the guy is more qualified & has a better career too. vani^_^

I don't know why there are still cultures that treat women as property and think marriage is a social/financial gain. It really angers me to see women treated in such a bad way. Marriage should only be entered into when two people love each other. It is not something that one should pay for. I think your friend should tell this man to "take a hike" (that is really nice for what I am thinking) and she should be thankful that she isn't in a marriage where the man obviously doesn't love her --he is only looking for money.

I think she should live on her own and make up her own mind who she wants to marry and the parents should stay out of it altogether. I think the custom of parents marrying off their daughters is absurd! It's like an animal you give away or sell. Basically, they are selling their child to some man who may treat her like garbage the rest of her life. Having been around a lot of Indian men where I live, I can tell you that there attitudes toward women stinks! I work as a desk clerk in the hotel where I live and a lot of Indians stay here. It's really infuriating when I try to tell them to be quiet or close their door and they ignore me. I finally spoke to one of the older Indian gentlemen and explained that if they didn't keep quiet, I was going to call the police. If they are going to come into this country, they need to obey our laws and rules and they need to have a reasonable respect for women because we are considered equal to men in this society. There have been a number of times when they have been rude and would have liked to punch their lights out. One of these days, they are going to be rude to an American woman and she's going to let them have it big time. They may find themselves flat on their face. I also don't understand the reason for fixing chicken on the floor. They prepare their chicken on the floor and the juices get all in the carpet and attract roaches by the truckload. It's really gross! When some of them moved out last week, we had to bleach bomb the room to get rid of the roaches and we had roaches crawling all over the walls and carpet in the hallway. I feel like sending the health department in along with an exterminator to give them a citation for unhealthy living. Just because you don't have health standards in India doesn't mean we don't here. Sorry to get off the subject but some of your customs are really strange and unfavorable to women and sanitation.

Not only in Nepal it is still prevalent to your neighbour hood Nepal. It must be totally stopped. In ancient times dowry was given to the new couples to able to make a new single family so that they'll separate from their family and make a new life with each other. But being much more educated it is foolsihness to ask for dowry. He's marrying her only for money i hope. Or either he wants to start new business. Sounds like its arrange marriage. In love marriage the possibility of dowry system is very low. As a whole it must be stopped. traditional rule...

Unfortunately I live in the USA and that culture is lost to us. The question is do they both love eachother? Why marry if not for love.. Why should money factor into it by way of a dowry. Would he still want to marry her even if she had no Dowry and if not what kind of relationship would this be..? How long would it last? Unfortunately like I said I'm not familiar with the culture and basing my answer of my feelings.. Which is what I feel a marraige should be based off of. I wish your friend luck in her choices because ultimately she has to make the decision but i think she should hold out for someone who is in love with her no matter if they get a dowry or not.

well dowry per say should be banned. the girl should bring watever she feels is necessary not wat d husband feels is necessary

Well, it is always hard to get rid of something that have been in practice for very long. That is the way they know how to do it. I don't like the sound of it and I wouldn't marry someone that I don't love just for my family's welfare.

It should be stopped, but it CAN'T be stopped. It has become a part of culture and its not easy to change one's culture.

the dowry thing i think is in the tradition in each respective countries like India..theyve been practisng it...if the girl can afford why not if that man is really deserving...with regards to my opinion i guess if the man really loves the woman he dont have to ask for anything even though its their tradition..

yeah i know... it is really sad... dowry system is really rampant in this country.... and i don't see the necessity for this... if anything, its the men who have to pay the woman the money.... all the man needs to do is to go work in his office.... as for the lady, she has to work, do housework... suffer for 9 months when she is carrying their child... have a really painful childbirth(and in india,its just not one), then take care of the child, then again work and slog and blah blah.... who is gonna compensate all this?? no one says why the dowry has to be given in the first place!! and if it is given, it should be in the girls name and should never be transferred into the guys name!! that way it would be her money.. if it were me, i would have never married the guy! actually nowadays there are marriages with no dowry... i only hope it happens for all marriages

This is not a question. It must be rout out immediately and only youngers can do this happen. Government has to taken too tough steps for removing it.

This problem full responsibility For parents wht they did means , they will send to there son /daughter to higher study like engineering / doctor so they have to spend lots of money for studying expences for that digeree they are asking the money ,the parents is taken back the money like this way lots of family i know like these ...the the concept come cross the childrens mind also ..Depends upon family background ..Some one whtever digree they have they didnt ask the money so wht the girl family did they will give the Gift like car , property like these any how this system is like a cancer cannot remove completely in the socity but its necessary to remove this system is very dangerous in the society...

Sudha, I too feel the dowry system should be stopped. I want to share my opinion on the root cause as to why people take dowry. Imagine a person has one son and one daughter. Even if the son is broad minded and does not want to take dowry, he will be forced by his parents to take dowry. The reason is if he does not take dowry, then he does not have money to pay for his sisters dowry. Also rich people give dowry very willingly to show their status and because of that poor people are forced to give.

The asian society is undergoing achange.so slowly the dowry system will also go out.Girls should have the courage to live frely and independently if no suitable groom without dowry is available. Young men have to decide to take oath not to ask for dowry but all male members of the society do not have the courage to stand up against their parents.(I really pity them and their ignorance) It is better not to marry a creature which is not wise.The object of eduction is to make a person wise in all ways and make him auseful memeber of the society .when such an object fails the person can be called only a creature and not ahuman being.Girls should learn to reject the creatures

no one can stop it and it will be like a routine procedure of an marriage. It's highly unlikely to get it stopped.

I definitely believe the dowry system needs to be dropped. Marriages should come out of love and compatibility, not out of financial arrangements. People need to get together because they love eachother, not because of some selfish gain. There are better ways to make money, than having people as property.