mistress in despair

This is just my opinion and I have nothing against you personally so please don't take it negatively. 1. First of all, before a woman becomes a mistress it has to start somewhere right? It could be mutual attraction, or one of the parties involved got attracted first and did the pursuing. 2. After the pursuing, the two parties becomes a couple right. 3. The lastly the two decides to move in together and the woman officially becomes a mistress. Now here's my take on it. Between 1,2,and 3 there is that point in time when a woman could SAY NO, I do not want to be your Mistress. No matter how much a woman can love a man, it's still her decision whether she wants to become a Mistress or not. As to whose fault is it. The problem between the husband and the wife is not the other womans problem. But the relation of the other woman and the man is the problem of all 3 parties. I hope you get what I mean. If he and his wife can't make their relationship work that's their problem not yours. If he wants you then he has to give up his wife first so that he could marry you or move in with you freely without legal repercussions. He can't have his cake and it too you know. So don't settle for anything less.

It is natural for every human being to fall in love with each other....but with the exeptions. Just like the topic is asking who's to be blame/who's fault being a mistress? As a woman.......i am admitting myself that we are always the cause.............the bait to catch the fish. Both of them, man an woman are to be blamed in this kind of situation. It is not only the woman who did it nor the man who did it but both of them. Both of them enjoyed the wrong time to fall in love.........both of them HURT the other parties feelings.... at the start they must know the outcomes of what they are doing practically should be considerate to others. They must think that it will happened to them too.........how will they feel? They must sacrifice themselves rather than to create problems or become the heart breaker of the other party.........Should it be possible to think better when you feel crazy in love with a guy who is married?

The blame falls on the husband... He decided to get married and it is his duty to fulfill his commitment to his wife and family. He knows what he is doing and he knows that he is betraying his wife. The blame doesn't fall on the wife, because she probably does not know about it and if she does there is nothing she can do to change it but get a divorce. A wife could be doing everything in her power to satisfy her man and he still will cheat if thats what he desires to do. The mistress also can be at fault due to the fact that most mistress' know that there "partner" is married, and even though they may not know the wife personally they know they are ruining a family. She shouldn't settle for being a mistress, she should make him decide or move on to a new relationship!

I think it's mostly the fault of the husband. He's a married man and should not be doing something to betray his wife and break his marriage vows. Even if his marriage with his wife is not going well, they should try to fix things, not make things worse by fooling around with another woman. Or if the marriage was really that bad, he should get divorced first before he fools around with another woman behind the wife's back. The mistress is also to blame because she might have seduced the married man. Or even if it "just happened," she just fell in love with him, the husband should have resisted the other woman's advances because he knows he is a married man.

Thou shalt not commit adultery....

All of them...

A mistress chooses to be one, so there is no one else to blame fo her being a mistress other than herself.

I would say that most of the blame falls on the husband. He is the one breaking his vows, and cheating on his wife. I don't believe it is ever the wife's fault, because if there were a problem between wife and husband, he should either work it out with her or leave her, rather than cheating. As for the mistress, she should know better than to get involved with a married man for her own sake, but it's not her job to make sure other people keep their marriage vows. And if it weren't her that the man was cheating with, then it would probably be someone else. So she can't really be blamed either, though she is putting herself into a bad position.

I would say that everyone is to blame. Starting with husband and wife. He broke his vows. He should have went for help before getting to this point. As for a mistress why put your self in that situation to begin with? You need to love your self first and not settle for sloppy seconds. And why allow your self to fall in love with him? Ten years down the road the same thing will happen to the mistress only this time she will be the wife. Sorry if I sound harsh but this us what I think. Let me pleave offer a warm welcome to mylot!

I really feel that people need to learn to let go- then maybe there would be less cheating, let me explain: If the moment people knew they were looking elsewhere for what they are not getting at home, they would be honest to the partner they made a commitment to and tell them that the prior arrangement is no longer working out and we must part ways. This makes you free to do as you want. Being the victim of a cheating man and knowing the hurt of finding out that type of information stops me from becoming a cheater, mistress or any other like- because I know how it feels to be on the recieving end of it all.

It a bit of a mixture but I think it mostly falls on whomever is doing the cheating. There's a reason, whatever it may be, they're doing it.

In a relationship there is always a reason why a couple turn separated or the husband or the wife is having an affair to somebody. Maybe, the problem was not properly discussed or going to bed, or in their work without solving their problem. They don't even giving each other proper respect, and luck of trust to both of them. I always believe that a husband or a wife if they have a strong love, God's fearing, full of respect with each other and with open communication I don't think one of them will attempt to getting into another relationship. I do believe no matter a woman falls in love to a married man or vice versa if the sincerity they have promised during their vows absolutely it won't happen.

Being mistress in the first place absolutely wrong. Ladies out there who are single, you should avoid relationships with married guys other than friends or colleagues or business partners. The mere though of getting closer to a married guy is a warning sign. This should not be the case. When you start to like that married guy that would turn out to be more than friends, it would lead to something you will regret later. You don't want to ruin a family, you don't want to be the cause of marriage problems ending in divorce. Mistresses out there, how would you feel if this happen to you also?

i wish i could say its the fault of the mistress but no, i for one respect marriage, but i could also respect the love that is there for the man and his mistress, although , if you could see this in the perspective of the children , the man's children and your own future, you would know better to actually see that many would get hurt and sacrificed, my family and another family has been ruined and hurt until now, it affects my personality, my mother is the mistress, this would forever scar your children, hurt you in the end, i hope youre ready for all the consequences, i couldnt blame you, but this wouldnt be a good journey at all, all in all its not even worth it.

I guess there can be many reasons why a mangoes out to get a misstress, I sometimes think that people can be just unmatched sexually so this is one thing that makes me believe a man and woman should live together before getting married, in this area a man and womas have to be compatiable, I have know woman friends were got married and then decised they didn't like the things she was expected to do, and some men have large appetites so I guess every case is different.

I believe most of the blame goes to the mistress,why would you want to be interfeering with someones marriage? besides breaking up a marriage she is nothing more than a kept woman. and i supose the man has to be quilty as well for cheating on his wife. if he has problems at home either straighten them out or get a divorce and than go about your bussiness.

I think that you can only be responsible for your own actions. If you are with a married man, it is your fault becuase you choosing to be with him. You can't blame the man for being a cheat and you can't blame the wife for not doing a good job. Neither of them are forcing you to be a mistress. I am not saying you are a bad person for being a mistress, I am just saying that everyone chooses their own path.