How other people can help.

You're right, thereused to be a saying in the north of England, 'it's nice to be nice'. Being nice to others gives both people a good feeling. My husband suffers from depression but my two year old grandson often says things that help him. A smile costs nothing and an make someone elses day. Take care.

That is a good idea. When you are depressed, you are so much in the dumps, that you need as many complements and made to feel useful. Oftentimes we feel that we are not good enough and everyone can do things so much better than we can. Also we often feel that everyone is against us and that there are looking for ways to disapprove of our methods. So if someone does even one complement, we start to gain the confidence that may have been denied. us.

I totally know how you feel. Not only do some people hardly give compliments, but some people mostly just try to put you down. I am always positive with other people about the things they share with me, why can't everyone be just as polite? I have depression, am currently off medication and whenever I feel unwanted I rely on my inner strength to tell me I am only unwanted by the ill. And then I think I would rather feel lonely and unwanted then have relationships with people that cross my boundaries. You are not useless at all zorro girl, you are one of the seldom people with a sincerely kind heart and people like us should donate eggs :-).

Ahh as much as I agree with you and wish that more ppl in the world WOULD be kindhearted and whatnot..unfortunately that would require ppl to look past themselves and outward to the world and ppl around them...that takes work and in todays world the masses unfortunately just dont want to do that...Ppl have become very much a "me me me" species....its sad but true...

I think your not useless and unloved,you see there are people asking for your adviced.They come to you because they know that you can help them and they trust you that you will give them the best adviced possible. Compliments from other people is a good sign that they appreciate the things you do. They wouldn't do that if they don't love you so stop thinking youre unloved. Youre a great person and you should be happy with your life. There are people that we cannot please even we do our best but like you said atleast we should compliments others.

hi zorrogirl, i have read the other responses and i just wanted to add something to what everyone else was saying. I, myself, have not experienced the pain of depression, but my mother has. One of the things that her psychologist told her to do when someone said something bad about her, hurt her feelings, made her mad, made her cry, etc. was to write down on a piece of paper what is was. When she wrote whatever it was that had hurt her down on the paper, she was to read it in the opposite way that it read. For example, if someone called her ugly, she was to write it down, and then read it as if it said "I am beautiful". Then she was to burn the piece of paper and tell herself, that hurtful memory was gone. I know it sounds kind of ridiculus when you first hear of something like that, but it actually helped my mother. And several time a week she was to write down the bad things she thought about herself and then burn them. This experiment helped my mother and it might help you too. I don't know what your individual situation is but it might help. Another thing that help to soothe her mind was to write poetry. Nothing fancy or anything, just little happy poems about anything. Anyway, I hope this helps you in some way. Feel free to send me a message if there is anything else that i could do to help you in anyway; even if it's only to lend an open ear.

You are not only depressive but more than likely suffer some type of personality disorder or auto dismorphic syndrome. Complimentary affirmations can also start with you as it sounds like you need to learn how to love yourself. Taping written affirmations to your bathroom mirror and reading them aloud to yourself can help a lot. I also think that there has to be someone in your life who is aiding and enabling these feelings of worthlessness and low self esteem. No matter who they are to you, GET RID OF THEM! is the best advice that I can give. Chin up. God loves you and so do I.

i can understand what you are saying... feeling loved and appreciated is really very important in our lives... and we all like to hear compliments... i hope you will feel better soon... take care...

Ww are conditioned from an early age not to give complements, not to give our feelings away. Also, our ego is such that to take advice is often seen as a sign of weakness. With so much emotional baggage around, finding someone who can act positively towards us is rare. When we find them there are a rare and blessed treasure, hang on to them blessed be

I have to add, though, that those who give compliments are not always sincere and you can tell. They are just saying what they always say and don't always mean it. That can be depressing too. It would be nice to get some really enthusiastic compliments. I have lost a lot of weight recently and am surprised that people haven't commented on it. Well, I guess they are just jealous. I think that plays a part in it too. People are too jealous to compliment you on things they wish were happening to them. Think about that and maybe you won't be so depressed. Have a good day! :)

Im not sure why people dont do this more. Maybe some people just has it in there nature to give people compliments. Im sorry to hear that you feel that one zorrogirl. I hope things get better for you. *hugs to you*

and you can see that this is the first "mylot"from me--a magician~so..take it easy and gimme your smile,not only for me,but also for yourself^^

sometimes i just feel like that life is not like a box of chocolate..if it was,the taste would not be so good that i could enjoy it..But i have to admit that everyone has his own advantages..and you find out you can be full of courage with the compliments, actually everyone likes it.trust me , the attitude decides your future^^

Let me compliment you on your discovery and implementation of a technique that works; complementing others. Way to go!! where some turn to medication and some times self-pity, (I know I did for a short while) you chose a positive action instead! You are to be congratulated!! If there were more people like you, the world would be an even better place!

You can change the way you feel by changing your thought pattern. Always take comments positively. for example if someone tells you you are ugly, Think of it as the others feeling of insecurity about you, The person who told you that is feeling so insecure about the beauty that is in you, that is why he/she takes the time, effort and nerve to tell you that, to annoy you. Hence, thank them for noticing you at all, and spending energy to let you know, lol...

I am a teacher and know that positive comments helps build children's self esteem. It makes them feel good and can have a positive effect on their work as well as their behavior. I like to share a child's work with my class and get the other children to say what they like about it. It is sad when a child is really sad and comes to school feeling worthless. Maybe they have a difficult home life. One boy told me he hated himself. Later he felt much better playing with a toy puppet theater and felt useless when the other children said how good his show was. I hope that you feel wanted, loved and useful again soon. I am glad that people have given you some lovely compliments lately.

Well, taking the time to post this is a good thing. Sometimes the people who know us don't appreciate us, or not realizing that we mean something to them. Don't let it get you down. Find some other positive ways to smile, and forget what bothers you. If we could all remember to compliment others, it is a nice habit to have. It does feel good to receive compliments. I agree with you totally.

The perfect world would be filled with kindness but we don't live in a perfect world. Compliments don't come easy to people and only by us starting the ball rolling will it ever be a fact. Depression is a disease that requires a lot of bolstering and there are family and friends to attend to our needs. One compliment deserves another and thats the way to keep the ball on course. Have a wonderful day!

yes uneed advice here.no need to feel depressed here.it is just a phase.daily isnt a sunday.one day u win one day u lose.yes play some badmiton and they r gone .u need sports right now dear!

I agree that we do need assurance from people closest to us during times when we are attacked by depression. It is very important that we dont stop communication not only with your immediate families but with your closest friends as well and we should not forget that SOMEONE above there is the most reliable source of energy, lets not forget to pray. Have always faith with GOD.