" I love you but your job scares me"

You have to trust that your loved one is very good at their job. They wouldn't be out there if they didn't like their job and therefore lax or they didn't know what they were doing. But there are jobs where its not the danger, but the different lifestyle a family would have to have which I could see someone not interested in. where they would not seek out to date someone in those lines of work but if they fell in love with someone who became one, they would stick by them.

yea its different when they are already in that profession. you knew what they did before you met them so you have to deal with it. But if they decide to do it after you been dating awhile than yea I would say that the other person should have an opinion on it.

I admire your stance very much but I think it would be so hard to remain friends only with someone you loved and I feel it would be even harder for you if he started getting involved with some-one else. oh I think that would be harder than seeing him in a dangerous job but I understand your feelings.

I have never and could never be attracted to a guy who has that profession or is interested in adopting it. I just don't like that kind of guy. So no, I couldn't be with someone of that profession.

I always told myself I couldn't be with a firefighter or a cop, because of the constant worrying. However, ya never know where life will lead you, I'm with a cop now, granted he was one when we met, we've been together over 2 years now, do I worry about him, yes, but I've learned that the time we have together is more important then worrying about what might or might not happen. And I've been a wildland firefighter for 12 years now, and starting next spring I will be eligible to be sent out west on the big fires, will he worry about me, sure, but he won't let it consume him either. And my daughter is married to a soldier, he's home with us this holiday season, but has served in Iraq on 3 tours of duty, it's hard for her at times, but they stay in touch and she comes and spends time with us, we live 6 hours apart. So, things we think we could never do, become possible is you truly respect and love the other person.

I think I could be supportive and stick by them. Everyday when we walk out the door there are dangers even in just walking across the street. I know what you mean though..it's like they would be setting themselves up for danger!

It is not the job you are in Love with, it is the person and I cant see what a job has got to do with love. By the time you fall in love, you will have known the person, his/her name, the job he/she/does, where he/she comes from. his/her relatives nd if after nalysing all these you still appear to b in love, then it should be clear to you, that is your love and what work he/she does is immaterial.

I think it takes a pretty strong person to admit something like that and an even stronger person to be able to remain friends with the person. I on the other hand take the other view of this. My husband is a soldier with the 82nd airborne and just this past year we experienced a pretty big test of our relationship when he was sent to Iraq last august. It was scary and stressful but I love him and I wanted to stay with him, at that point we werent married yet. He is very important to me and I know how important his job is to him. I feel blessed that despite this he decided he wanted to include me in his life. Being separated for that long and continuing to maintain a relationship was stressful and sometimes difficult with me still being in college. Then in April his humvee hit an IED and he got a broken knee cap and some other injuries that caused him to be sent home to recover. he was stationed at ft bragg so thats where all his recovery would be taking place, I was finishing my sophomore year in college. He couldnt stay with me in Va but he needed someone to be with him becuase he couldnt drive himself. I made the choice to move with him to NC so I could be with him and help him even though the only way the army would let us do that is if we got married so we did. I love him so much that I sarificed a big part of my future and put it on hold to help him. sometimes when you love someone thats what you do. other times you have to do things the way you said and just let it go to be best for both of you. :)

Well if that's what he really wants to do, I think you should give him a chance. Give him a few years to do it. Be financially intelligent so he can retire early and take on a much safer job.

Being a 911 dispatcher, I see the pain the guys go through. It takes a special kind of spouse to be able to deal with the fear. There are only a few guys that have been married for a long time. Most are on their 2nd or 3rd marriages. The fear, danger, long hours, unwanted overtime. It can be a real problem in some marriages. You definitely have to know what you're getting into and be able to handle it !!

If I love someone, it doesn't matter what they do. Yes, I'd worry. I'd be afraid that something bad might happen that takes them away from me. But I would still support them, let them follow their heart and be there for them when they need.

When my husband and I met he was military and he still is. But, his job has changed. Where he used to sit in an office all day everyday and never deploy, he now deploys a lot. He is out using explosives, and is trained to save lives in the middle of combat. He is a medical provider, yet so much more. I can't even explain all the aspects of his job here. I do know that he is constantly training, that way when he does deploy he is fresh in his knowledge. Before he was in this job he was a counter terrorism cop. The training he got from that job, has only helped him in this one. Yes, his job scares me and sometimes I hate it. That being said, I could never turn my back on him or our relationship because I was scared. Walking away from him wouldn't make me love him less, so it certainly wouldn't make me worry about him less.

Well if I truly loved someone then I would accept any job that they would choose. Because I could not give up a love just because I was scared. People die when it's their time to go rather they die in the line of duty or in a car accident on there way to a "not scary" job. I would support them and pray for them when they left for work. I wouldn't worry so much because it would just drive me crazy and you can't change anything by being worried. Have a great day.

I don't think so, If I love a girl,she want do a job as a cop,I will support her to work and love her forever.

I can understand it. It is very hard to have a partner who has a dangerous job. Since I love him, so I want him to be safe all the time. Otherwise I will be so sad and suffering. As long as I love him, so I care about him. Maybe I am selfish and perhaps I can't agree with his decision, but I still hope he will change a safer job.