Is it too late to feel sorry after someone has died?
By ctrymuziklvr
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
United States
February 7, 2008 9:37am CST
My 18 year old niece and my son were always too busy to call or visit my Mom when she was alive. My son was always working and when he was home he was either doing a side job for his landlord or "chillin' out". Every time I told him to call her he said he would but it never happened. He's felling so bad about it now that it's just about making him sick. My niece admitted to me last night in an email that she was just too lazy and is feeling terrible about it now that my Mom is gone. Both of them are crying to me about how sorry they are that they didn't do things differently while their Nana was alive. I tell them things like Nana knew they were living their lives and had things to do but she knew they loved her and not to beat themselves up over it but I don't think I really feel that way and a part of me is mad at both of them for not being there for their grandmother.
What would you tell these two kids (even though my son isn't a kid and is 32 years old)? Do you think it's too late to feel sorry about the way you treated someone after they have passed away?
10 people like this
8 responses
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
8 Feb 08
I think what you said to them was fine ctry. If she was as important to them as they were to her, they should of made it known before she passed away. I think it is too late. It's better to be in someone's life while they are still alive than when they pass, they only remember what you did with them beforehand - well I think anyways.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160665)
• United States
8 Feb 08
I think no matter how much we are with a loved one, we always think we could have done better. As for feeling sorry, if they are expressing this feeling to you, they need to be told that if that is genuine remorse then they should treat the living people they still have better. Be there for those who are alive now.
@wisedragon (2325)
• Philippines
8 Feb 08
I'm afraid it is too late when the person has already passed. That's why I believe in expressing my love for family as best as I can, everyday. I do everything I can for my parents, be it physical help or financial. That's the only way to live life with no regrets.
@8ctavarium (552)
• Australia
7 Feb 08
Yes at times I think it is too late, but it can also be a good thing as well. Because of what has happen now, I am sure that they now appreciate life much more and take every moment for granted now, especially loved ones.
1 person likes this
@madlees (1377)
• India
9 Feb 08
It is always better late than never, dear. I can understand you being a mother of two grown up kids. they are kids only even when they are 30 or 32, they are still our kids right.. They take life very casually and sometimes I am also hurt by their behaviour. But they repent but it gets very late in some cases for example like your Mom's.
Forgive them dear.. they are just being kids even now. They are going through hell now , so be for them to get over this. Let them grow up by themselves, hereafter they wouldn't do a thing like this.
