Have you Experienced This???
By slickcut
@slickcut (8141)
United States
February 27, 2008 1:49pm CST
I hate to be negative,and complain but i have a question for mylotters...I have a lot of really good friends here on mylot,and i appreciate all of my friends,but i have a small problem...I have one or two that i have added to my friends list that open 10-15 discussions per day,but they NEVER answer a discussion that you open...What is up with this? I think friends should answer your discussions sometmes..I do not expect all my friends to answer my discussions,but on at least one occassion they should at least answer one, is that asking to much???I don't answer everyone of my friends discussions all the time,i answer the ones of interest or that i might can add some imput,but i am sure we cannot answer all of them,but ever now and then a friend could maybe answer at least one ever so often...Do you have at least one friend thats fills your box up wirh discussions but never,Never answers not one of your EVER????Do you tuen them off,or how do you handle this ?????
11 people like this
24 responses
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
27 Feb 08
A plus for this discussion Ellen! I understand your frustration. I have gotten to the point where I start very few discussions anymore because very few people ever respond to them (other than, like you, the standard few). I now respond to as many discussions as possible and am making new friends this way as well as earning money too. ~Donna
3 people like this
@visitorinvasion (7709)
• United States
9 Mar 08
This new activity tracker really helps for those of us who don't start a lot of discussions on a regular basis. It's much easier to find you in here now, Donna. ;D
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
27 Feb 08
LOL - I posted almost the same thing early this morning - I've now deleted a whole bunch of 'friends' and put the notify to 'off' for a whole bunch more - I'm tired of feeling bad because I don't have time to respond to all of the discussions from my friends because of others who aren't 'true friends'.
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
28 Feb 08
Well, before I finished I had deleted around 85 or so - those were ones that either NEVER responded to any of my discussions or have been inactive for over 6 months.
@pismeof (855)
• United States
28 Feb 08
Slick,If you only have one or two that aren't responding to any of your discussions , What is it your worried about?Maybe some of the things that you are posting isn't of particular interest to them or they simply don't know how to respond to a particular topic the way that it's phrased.
Just as in real life some people care more about talking(posting) versus those that
prefer to listen(responding).
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
28 Feb 08
no no i have a lot of friends that do not answer my discussions,but they do answer sometimes..I don't worry about friends that do not answer...They will answer if i post something they are interested in.....The point i am trying to make is when a person (your Friend) post 15 to 20 post a day but NEVER answers a POST..They just spend all their time opening discussions but NEVER answer one...
@barehugs (8973)
• Canada
27 Feb 08
This is a good question for "Crash!" Hes the Hotshot Expert. Why not send him a message? Imagine if everyone did this. I'm sure myLot would dry up and blow away. Yes I think Crash would get very excited, as least if he doesn't he should!
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
27 Feb 08
well what would end up happening if everyone did this, would be we would only open discussions and reply to mylotters that commented on our discussions..We would not really need friends at all..We could just depend on anyone who chooses to answer....I might just ask Crash but i doubt that he could or would do anything about it..This person is not breaking any rules, they are just extreemly selfish...
1 person likes this
@ersmommy1 (12588)
• United States
27 Feb 08
I don't think it's negative to wonder what may be going on. I have alot of friends here as well more are added almost daily. I am sure some wonder what happend to me too. I do try at least once a week to get to some friends discussions. Cannot always get to every one.
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
27 Feb 08
I understand that we cannot answer all of our friends but if you are friends for a few months and if they open a discussion you will at least answer maybe one of theirs in a few months...This person opens lots of discussions per day,like 15 or more but Never do they ever answer not one of their friends...All they do is open discussions and reply to their own discussion but never even tries to answer even one from any of the friends they have...
1 person likes this
@r1mp2ge (260)
• Ukraine
28 Feb 08
That's just plain rude...I don't have many friends but I'm sure I will help the ones that I have added.
I myself got a friend request randomly and I don't really know why i was chosen and well i have made like 3 or 4 discussions which lay empty without responses...You would think these guys would like to give me a hand?
Oh well..Can't expect much but I'll tell you one thing If I was your friend I would definitely try to help you out no matter what.
2 people like this
@Polly1 (12645)
• United States
28 Feb 08
Yes this has happened to me. I don't start many discussions, when I do I know a few people will for sure respond. I appreciate that so much. I did have a "friend" that started lots of discussions, my email would get crowded. This person would never come to mine. I didn't delete this person, but I did turn off the email notification. We can't answer every discussion but we sure can find the time to respond to some, specially if you respond top theirs.
1 person likes this
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
28 Feb 08
I agree Polly, i do know this is a discussion site,and it does not hurt to open a lot of discussions,but filling up my box everyday gets old..I was away for a few days when lightening struck my modem,and when i was able to get back on line i had 35 e-mails from this person,in just 2and ahalf days...
@ESKARENA1 (18261)
•
27 Feb 08
I honestly try to get round as many as i can but i dont always manage it I guess i just have too many people on my list
blessed be
2 people like this
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
28 Feb 08
I have very few friends that respond to my discussions. In fact I rarely ever start discussions anymore cause of lack of response. A while back I quit responding to the ones that never responded to mine when I was always responding to theirs. They are often the ones that start one discussion after another anyway so I was using most of my time responding to them.
@raijin (10345)
• Philippines
28 Feb 08
Now that you've mentioned it, I happen to have a few of them on my list as well. I know that they were the one's who made a request for me to be added on my list, but I happen to remember that none of them have even responded to my own discussions or even on my response on their posts. They haven't even bothered looking or commenting to any of the responses they receive, which makes me wonder. I'm going to check them if they are still active, since I turned the notifiers "off" for them. I'm going to remove them on my list, since I don't have to keep others who's main intention is to make you as their "melting pot" here.
I have deleted and removed some of them already, I will still do the same whenever I found out the truth behind their means of treating other members or friends here.
Personally, I don't start that much of a post myself but I don't really like the thought of being USED here..
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
28 Feb 08
I suppose I don't pay enough attention to which of my friends respond to me or not. I pretty much just accept when people respond to me, and don't worry about it when they don't. I always check my "discussions my friends started" and respond to the ones that interest me, but I don't respond to ones I don't find interesting, so there are probably friends I never respond to as well.
I guess if my list were smaller I would have a better grasp of who responds and who doesn't. Instead, I basically have a "list within my list"... an informal idea in my own head of which people here I consider "real" friends as opposed to just "people on my friends list".
1 person likes this
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
28 Feb 08
If you had a friend that filled up your mail with 15 or 20 discussion per day,you would pay attention,you could not help it...One day i counted 15,and the next day it was like 13,and on and on on a daily basis..I never could answer them all because there was so many everyday...Then i snapped and realized that this person NEVER answered any other discussions for no one...That is a ver good idea to have a list within a list" Great Idea lecanis
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
28 Feb 08
It all depends whether they get to your discussion and how much time do you have. It could be that she was too busy to get to yours. For instance, I usually go to the digest first, well because I do not want to answer some first on the mylot page that may be deleted because someone violated myLot guidelines, and I am busy during the day, so sometimes I am lucky to answer fourteen a day. So why not send her a message and maybe I guess you can enclose a link to the post you want her to answer. She may never know.
1 person likes this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
28 Feb 08
Hello Slickcut,
Geez, I don't quite know how to answer this discussion. I hope I am not one of those nasty people you mentioned. *pout*
(Nah, I don't think you are talking about me since I don't post 10-15 discussions a day.:P)
Well, back to the discussion, I guess this is an exercise in bigheartedness. If possible, try to ignore the fact that the person is not reciprocating. After all, friendship is not some transaction.
I would still answer discussions of that friend even if he doesn't answer mine as long as his discussions are those I would want to answer on their own merits.
Don't think too much, my friend. Live and let live. Life is short, be happy! ^^
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
28 Feb 08
no No you are not one of (Those) haha....My computer was down for a couple of days,when i got it back i had 333 e-mails, and one third was from this person...I will still answer this persons post,its just that this person NEVER answers any post AT all EVER!from anyone.....I do not expect my friends to answer all my discussions,don't get me wrong,but ever now and then they should answer at least one since this person has been my friend for a very long time..This person answers no ones post at all....They spend all their time POSTING!
1 person likes this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
28 Feb 08
Well.. different people like doing different things LOL... no no, I am not gonna defend him or her I don't even know. :PPP
@ngty69 (971)
• India
28 Feb 08
Well there is nothing to get disheartened about. Because there will always be people on your different side who will always create hurdles. So don't get worried always be positive and good things will ultimately come.
Thanks for reading my response.
Goodbye
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
3 Mar 08
I notice something similar. They rarely respond to mine; they start up to 30 discussions a day; they only comment on the first few responders to their discussions, sometimes. Some of them don't go back and comment on the responses. If I find myself responding to the person who doe this I stop. I wonder if they even read our replies. These same people are always starting discussions on the same topic over and over all the time. It's such a pain. They also brag about their earnings and the fact that they continually get away with this stuff makes me not like this site.
@ElicBxn (63594)
• United States
28 Feb 08
I agree that it only seems fair that a friend should respond to your discussions as well as you responding to theirs. I do have some new "friends" that haven't responded to any of mine, but I don't really have TONS of discussions that are recent or maybe of their interests.
However, I still leave them on my list because I will get paid for responding to their discussions as well as if they respond to mine.
I guess what I would like to see more of tho, is them giving me a response to my response, and actually HAVING a discussion.
1 person likes this
@ldybgsgma99 (798)
• United States
28 Feb 08
I agree with you completely. I seldom get responses to my conversations and I am even less likely to get them from one of my friends. Go figure. I have a couple friends that will answer but not many. Once in a while I would like to hear from more of them.
@meenneixz (668)
• Philippines
28 Feb 08
Yah really true I experience it always....
1 person likes this
@rashmi_simha (13)
• India
28 Feb 08
Hi,
Its depends on interest of people or friends. If our discusion is very intersting then definitly they will answer for it. We cant expect this for all discusion.If we r not getting answers then definitly we need to revisit our discusion and make it intersting.