How do you know a friend is a true friend????
By queenofarms
@queenofarms (1659)
United States
February 29, 2008 12:12pm CST
The reason I asked is...I worked in a restaurant..I did my job and help another do hers...I thought we had became close..I would tell her everything..Well other employees would tell me she was talking behind my back...I didn't believe them because they were trouble makers themselves. Well we had a change of managers..They did this once a year. The new managers decide they were going to change our schedules that worked out best for us..I threw a fit and said I just quit and this friend wasn't very happy about it either... While I'm getting my things together this manager is talking to my friend..When I went to tell my friend I was leaving she told me the manager grabbed her by the arm...So I took it up on myself to tell another manager the next day..This manager talked to the general manager..I went to work for 3 days after this.Because my manager asked me not to quit we could work things out to fit my family life..Well on the 4th day I worked and went home..I recieve a call I needed to come back to work..I did go back...To walk into my manager yelling you are a lair..I didn't grab her my the arm...I said okay call her in and ask her...He replies we did and she denys me grabbing her...I asked them to call her in front of me and put her on speaker phone. They tried and she would not answer...Now I had just talked to her..On a cellphone...To make it short I was fired for lying...When I called the friend no more than 10 minutes later she answers...I again asked her did this manager grab you and she said yes. I said then tell the GM..And she says I don't want to get in the middle of it...Now she was suppose to be my friend...Do you have a true friend? Or have found out the hard way also?
2 people like this
10 responses
@terri0824 (4991)
• United States
29 Feb 08
So sorry to hear that this happened to you. It sounds like you were trying to defend her and help her out, but she didn't want to help herself, by standing up for herself. If she didn't want to get in the middle of it, she shouldn't of mentioned it to you in the first place.
@queenofarms (1659)
• United States
29 Feb 08
Amen...I had helped out when she needed to leave work for other job interviews,covered for her when she was on the phone,helped her out when she needed to get to work and what does she do get me fired. Then had the nerve to text me a week later to see how I was doing.....GRRRRRRRR
1 person likes this
@jsharriz (436)
• Ukraine
29 Feb 08
i wudnt say she's not ur frnd , may b she desperately needed the job nyways wat she did was wrong. mean while u shud have asked her b4 takin the matter to the superior... dat wudnt have got u in such situation.. wen u make friendship make it without ny expectations , believe in u..n knw ur limits, u'll sure have best ppl in lyf.. even if they rnt true to u they'll sure understand u smeday n stand by urside wen u least expect.
@queenofarms (1659)
• United States
29 Feb 08
Your right I should have let her report this manager. But she always left it up to me to see when we was getting a raise,could take a break etc...So I just thought she was afraid of the managers..I have learned my lesson...
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
4 Mar 08
That is awful. that is why I have no friends because it always turns out that way for me. I will not go out of my weay for any so-called friend that I have met in real life anymore because of it. I have been through this lots of times and had go through it again last year. I am tired of trying to be friends with people only for them to crap on me every time.
She isn't your friend and never was and never will be.
People are only out for themselves only.
I can understand her not wanting to get in the middle of it, but she should have taken care of the problem without spreading the word to someone else to tell it.
She should have at least told the truth and then both of you deal with it together.
I went through this when I worked for the state. There were so many culprits, it wasn't even funny but when it came down to it, i was the only one who admitted to everything and the rest of the backstabbing liars denied everything. Even my so-called friend there that I gave a shirt off of my back to and half of extra money and food I had at the time.
NEVER AGAIN!
@clairesstrange (47)
•
29 Feb 08
she is deffinately not your friend.... but dont let this put you down, not all people are like that...some people are really nice good friends...
ive had some so called 'friends' that were a million times worse than this girl, admittedly this was a bad incident....but i lost all of my friends and had to leave school, so i know what u must have gone through...
but this could be a blessing in disguise....after i left the school i went to college and now have the most amazing friends, now i bet you'll get a great new job, and make great new friends....
@queenofarms (1659)
• United States
29 Feb 08
I'm sure I will. Thanks for your response....Life goes on....;)
@omar0913 (942)
• Legaspi, Philippines
1 Mar 08
I also work in a restaurant, I also have a friend, an OJT in the restaurant I previously work with, she ask me to help her on the last part of her project which is the organizational chart inside the restaurant where she work as a trainee. On that time our manager was on a leave, but she said she don't have time to wait for our manager to help her with her project, so what I did since it was rush, I do help her, but the third day came and my manager is working again a letter came from the school where my friend was studying HRM (hotel and restaurant management)it says that my friends project was un signed, it should have a signature of my manager, my manager got shock, and ask my friend who did this, so maybe she got afraid that she might fail, she pinpoint me, that time I got fired for being guilty of insuburdination, now my friend was the new supervisor of that restaurant.
@meiling2610 (27)
• Singapore
3 Mar 08
i don think she deserved 2 be yr friend or a friendship....to me, i think fiendship do not allow any lying or betrayed...e moment she says ahe don't want to get in the middle of it...she hav betryed u betrayed e friendship....
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
29 Feb 08
first of all, it was her issue, you shouldn't have gotten involved, it was up to her to say the manager grabbed her, I am surprised they listened to you to be honest. According to law it has to be the victim, but the victim can call in a witness.
On her side she could be thinking that you betrayed her by saying something she did not want getting around.
Remember there is always two sides to a story
but all in all this person was never a friend, just somebody you worked with.
@skysuccess (8858)
• Singapore
1 Mar 08
I just like to add here that the both of you aren't very well equipped when it comes to office politics. Having this as a gauge to friendship is wrong.
In the 1st place you need to know that all of us have our weaknesses and you do not know how the other party's deck is like especially when there is a higher management involved. Also, both of you need the job badly and seems like loosing it over some management entanglement won't be looking good at their livelihood. Just let things cool down and get yourself another job. Talk things over when you are more settled who knows you will be surprised how your friend was dealt with at the other end.
