Frustrated and Sick

I could not even begin to imagine the pain you have gone through with losing a child. I think the memorial website is a really nice idea and that no one has any right to tell you otherwise. It sounds as though that man needs to learn to have some tact about saying things to you. I think you should not feel guilty at all for standing up for yourself and what you believe in. It's your grief that you're dealing with and to each his own. No one has any right to tell you how to grieve.~D

To lose a child is totally devastating and I can feel for you as I have been there. we never expect to have our children die before we do and its like nothing else in this world.donot feel guilty for the way you feel. We each grieve in our own way and more power to you for the way you personally grieve.thereis nothing for you to be ashamed of a memorial website for your daughter sounds wonderful to me. more power to you.

Oh I would have bit back, probably long before you did. If that's how you want to deal with your loss, and remember her, then so be it. If he doesn't then that's fine too, but keep his remarks about it to himself. So, yeah I would have gone off on him a long time ago, and no you shouldn't feel the least bit quilty.

First of all, I am so sorry for your loss. I have children and can't possibly imagine the pain of losing one of them.It has to be the worst. 2nd, we all grieve in our own way. Having an opinion is one thing but judging is quite another. When it comes to someone elses pain and suffering, if you can't offer support and help, then it is wise to just back off. I, too, would be very insulted and angry at the insults. Your relative is out of line. To be honest, I think that what you are doing in your daughter's memory is beautiful and you should not be made to feel bad about it. Others who loved her,i am sure appreciate what you are doing. And NO you should not feel guilty for finally standing up to this person. If anything, he should be feeling bad and owes you an appology. I would keep my distance from this person until when and if I got one.

I only have one child. My little man and if I lost him it would be the end of my world. So sorry about you loss. But no you should not feel guilty. I think it's wonderful that you celebrate your loss child's birthday. What does this family member expect you to do, drown in your sorrows instead? Do not feel guilty at all, it's good you stood up for yourself and said what you needed to say. If he disapproved this is one subject that he defiently should have kept to himself. God bless and stay strong.

Fallenrain YOU GO GIRL!!!! NOBODY will ever feel the way you feel about your loss even if they were to lose a loved one themselves one day! We all deal with a loss in our own way and we are entitled to do so. What others dont realize is that by doing what you have done, it is your way of healing, dealing and coping with your loss and you should receive support and respect for it - AND NOT BE RIDICULED! Dont feel guilty for telling him off - your hurt and your anger surfaced and let him know exactly how his attitude towards your loss bounced on you! Let him stew in your words to him for a good few days and you go along as you are doing what you have been doing. Maybe in a few days he will approach you again and hopefully with a more positive attitude but if not - choose to ignore it please. Each person that I have lost to the spirit world is given a special vase of flowers every birthday, fathers/mothers day and xmas day which we take to a garden of remembrance and place under trees. That is our way of celebrating and honouring them. Go well and many blessings love and light to you friend

I can't tell you what to do--as much as I'd like to!--because I don't know your family dynamics but it seems to me that he has no idea of the depth of your loss and sorrow. As others have said, if I lost one of my children I'd be catatonic. I think it's good that you finally told him some ugly things...it got it off your chest and let him know how you feel. It's just possible that he worries and thinks you're obsessed. Does he have children? If not, it gives you a clue--he has no idea of the depth of love a child digs within our hearts. Forgive yourself for your (justified) outburst and try not to think too much about it. When things cool off, you might want to try to talk about it when there's an opportunity. God bless you for your courage and perserverance. We recently lost my brother and I don't know how my mother functions. He was 62, not young, but if I lost a child I don't think I could be as brave as you or my mother. Turn that bravery into a positive and quit taking the emotional poison that others give you, you've dealt with enough.

dear don't get upset. You done a great thing by remembering your daughter and make her remembered forever by starting a website. You have to know one thing no man is going to live this world for a long period everyone has to go from here oneday. If one make carm situation surrounding to him and let others to live is kind from him.But no one does that everyone has their own philosophy and they think that what i do is correct. You have to rethink what i did is right as a third person and why can't others accept it, then you will find answer of it. If anybody stick on anything which is favourate for him and it lost ,take to another mood. Because he is living in that mememory which he knows that not goin to get back. Speciality of human being from others is that he remembers everything.Memory power is good for human, but for situation like this it is bad. So forget which is lost. And concentrate what you are doing. You says you cares your other children,but i say it just a caring, your mind is not there. you are wandering in your lost. So don't allow your mind to go like that and get frustrated. If you really likes your daughter you help an orphan girl for studies or anything. Forget that and accept the truth. You are not ready to accept the truth that's what troubling you. So please forget and concentrate in your work. Pray god, help others, do activities which take your full concentration and not allows you to think the lost. Holding the memeory of her in each and everystep you are losing so many things around you. Forget....Forget...Try to forget...that's the medicine i have to suggest.