Is it mental illnesswhen a mother wont allow son to grow up?

I don't know if it can be considered mental illness, it's a common trait in parents even if your case is really over the edge. My father too is too overprotective sometimes in a scary way but the reason is that he doesn't want to resign his role and he's retired so he has too much time on his hands and a very few things to do besides worrying about me & my sister. I bet this mother is an housewife or retired and she has very few interests besides her family. A good advice would be to find her something else to do instead of oppressing his son. Something that could give her another role besides that of the mother (ex she could be a volunteer and be helpful to unfortunate people) Also the son should do what he wants and take his freedom by himself, waiting for his mother to change is pointless. I've done that, I've done a lot of things that my father didn't want (for example doing long trips with friends only) and he has gradually accepted them

I have to agree that it is a kind of mental illness. If a mother is over-protective of her son it would be bad for the son too. His mental development would be halted. The son would face many difficulties later in life. So it is not that good to have a possesive mother who does not allow you to have any fun.

i think yes, it is. it is really sick i have even read that few mothers are so who just treat their adult children as children. it is not at all right. parents can give advice but not like this.it is actually hurting both.

i was reading responses and saw that majority agrees w/ you regarding it as mental illness. i know some might react from my point of view but here it is anyway. if i was still single, i would most definitely agree too. but ever since i became a parent, i see my son from a parent's point of view. it doesn't mean that i'd do that to my son, but maybe that mother just loves his son very much, maybe she has no one else, or has a very bitter memory that she wants to always be with his son. its true that the situation is not good for his son, but i do hope the son sticks out for himself, but will not disrespect the mother.

I would say it is. If someone is so dependent on another person that they don't want to let them get on with their life, it definitely would be a sign of some kind ofproblem!!! Most parents can't wait to get their kids out from under their roof and this one is quite the opposite. I think if someone (parent or otherwise) tried to treat me like that, I would run away and if that didn't work, I might take legal action. I don't know if that is an option where you are, but it would make sense to me.

Oh oh. This scenario sounds scarily similar - to where I might be soon. My mum is very intrusive and controlling - well she says that I'm just too closed, which may also be part of the problem, but still (I imagine the person in this scenario has a little worse, just guessing he's probably a little older than me or something too) It's hard having to make decisions against your parents - heck, it's hard even thinking about doing it (I should be, if all goes well, in university in Scotland next year 400 miles away). But well, although it's seriously difficult to live like this, she did raise me/you/him/her etc and and you only get one mother so personally I think its important to try get her some help (whilst keeping a safe distance away). Just my opinion on the thing. If that doesn't help the situation - change phone numbers and email addresses? :P

I saw a scenario like this on the TV the other night, on People's Court. I viewed it as selfish possessiveness by the mother. She even said she wanted her son to come home and be a "Mummy's Boy" again. This woman had been married only once, but had had ten different men live with her in a marital way, over the years. I think she needs attention from somebody, anybody, and as she's "single" a the moment, she won't let her son go. Yes, I think it's an illness, which needs to be addressed. Brightest Blessings.

Sounds like it is a mental illness. Some of this sounds like my mom who is bipolar with paranoid schizoid disorder. She did well when she was on her old meds for 20 yrs then a heart surgeon took her off meds. We finally got her on meds again but they are newer ones and don't work as well as the old one. She is very jealous of my husband and tries to cause trouble. She didn't do that when she was on the old meds.

That mother doesn't love her son in any way with that all conditins you stated here. Whenever possible she will allow all things that her kid shall be needing to growup,and be supportive to his endeavour each time in his life. A mother like her is definitely an extraordinary case that needs some professional help from authority like psychologists and or psychiatrists.

That's sad. It is a shame because her son will grow up and really resent her. When he breaks away , she will be left with no one because when the son breaks away, he will never come back.

Yes! She will just let her son grow up backwards. I'm sorry for the word but that is how I see it. I don't think the son will learn and can be independent if the mother will be there to dictate what must be done. When faced with a bigger challenge in life, tendencies are the inability of the child to cope with it. Even, how will the child learn to have an independent life when there will always be a mother to look over. Risks of taking any action will always be dependent of her. That is so gross and very unhealthy for a child. The mother maybe needs some parent counseling.

Yes it is.. You have to let them learn explore and make a good sense.. Mothers should teach the kids and be there in their growing years

not

It might be a little obsessive compulsive.