Live-in or marriage?

First of all, don't say "us women" as if every female is supposed to agree with you. Now as for the subject, I would understand if it were some "purity" thing that I see a lot of people believing in, but since you said you often spend the night together, then I fail to see what the issue is. You are in a committed relationship, right? You are intending to get married anyway(since that's important to you, right? So what's the problem. As far as I see it, you're spending 50% of your time at your place and paying 100% of the bills. It's just realistically and financially better to consolidate. I honestly don't see what the problem that you're having is.

It depends on your principles in life and the moral values of your family. Here in the Philippines, we regard marriage as a sacred thing so the common reaction will of course get married first before living in with a man. Especially when you are in the province, where the community has a certain dictate on the people's lives, it is quite difficult and they might misinterpret your reason for doing so. Is a grand wedding important to you or what you want is just a wedding? If you really want to live with him now, why not have a civil marriage first. That would at least lessen the burden on the issues of morality and the pressures from the family and community. You only need to spend a little on this. That way, you can live together peacefully while saving and planning for a nicer wedding or church wedding of your dreams.

Well, if you have been living with that person for a very long time, just marry that person, but honestly, living-in is not bad.

hi kitan! if you ask me, i would rather wait for marriage. i waited too for 7.5 years until we got married. and well, just an advice if you will take it, you don't really need to save a lot for a wedding. but rather save for your future together, especially get a house and having kids. exercise wisdom. take care always and good day to you. God bless you !

Hi i wil try to help u out but reading twice your discussion i couldnt understand but according to me i think u should get marry as i can understand your problem of money but there are many simpler way of getting marry like court marrige or arya samaj etc but living with out marry with man is not crime but for peolpe around society are crime for us as wel as our family so for protection not to take risk you should get married this year so u will feel more relax Have a Happy living and Happy marriage life

I actually have decided to marry one person I truly love.. if it happens that we do not get together someday, I will just be satisfied to Live-in with another woman.. I cannot see myself making a vow to another person besides the one i truly love..

my stand on this one: if you really want to live with him now and not wait for a church wedding, why not do a civil wedding? Do not move in with him. Wait until you are married before you live with him... you said that is about a year, and i think a year is just a short period of time.

I wouldn't marry someone without first living with them. it's easy to be on your best behaviour for a few hours together. without living together you don't know the real person.

Ive been married and divorced. I have lived with a man...I personally don't think I'd ever live with or tangle my life up again with another man. That being said ...I'd live with him before marrying him....marriage is just a government thing and a control issue as far as I can tell. People that truly love each other don't feel a need for marriage. Ok...could be wrong...As I t y pe , i think of my friend who married and is still happily married. I guess it is whatever is right for the couple involved. No one should get married to please anyone other than themselves.

Well I will tell you I have went through this problem me and my fiance have lived together for at least 2 years now and still have not gotten married. I mean we do plan on getting married but if you know you love eachother and are comfortable with eachother why not live together. This is a very touchy subject with a lot of people because there is so many views and you will have a lot of different responses but ultimately it is all up to you. We now even have the money to pay for our wedding but have just been putting it toward other stuff that we need right now. We know that we are staying together and dont have to justify our relationship to live together. It is what makes you happy is what you should do not what other people think. I hope everything works out for you guys.

Im a Filipina and I have the same situation as yours. But I do believe that you both should just wait until you both were able to afford. Marriage is sacred and thus should be respected in our culture. Moreover, there is always the possibility of simply living in. Although its okay to some, in our own culture, its not especially to the old ones. There are always talks and gossips around you and although you can always ignore those talks, it would be better to just simply wait on the right time than live in sin. :)

Have you asked your fiance about the court marriage? If you can't really afford having a grand church wedding then go on for the court wedding then if you have enough money then pursue on with the church wedding.

I am cohabiting or living-in with my partner/hubby not because we don't have money for a wedding but I don't feel like getting married yet. Actually we even have two kids now. Some reasons why we chose to cohabit is that we both believe that marriage is never an assurance that you will have a healthy, happy marriage or family life. If you are to cohabit with your bf, make sure that guilt or self-disrespect will not haunt you. You must be open minded enough to bear any consequences living in will make to you. If you plan not to have a baby out of wedlock, then be safe. Let's just be honest, I don;t think you are sleeping in your bf's house sometimes just sleeping or talking with him so what else is new? You would be living with him as his partner or wife and looking at the bright side, you'd be able to be with him most of the time and see how he fare everyday. You;ll be able to see how his tempers works, how he lives his daily life and so on... If after a few months and you have managed to really live as a couple, then there is no question for marriage. You can do it anytime. If you do not have money, why not have a simple or civil wedding? WHy hope for a grand wedding when you can't barely afford it? What matters is how you will live your life after the wedding and not that one day celebration of marriage.

i looked out your problem reading twice and well i think marriage is a sacred thing and according to me you should first get married first to live with a man else that may not be acceptable to the society.according to me waiting for one more year will be better in this case because if something wrong happens and the society doesn't accepts this it will be an overweight burden for you and i think this types of burden are really horrible to be taken care off

I think its purely on your choice.if you are comfortable in live in, then go for it. but whatever you do, do if your hart permits you. otherwise no need to do so. better wait till next year to get married.