For Men: What do you think if woman make the first move?
By afternoontea
@afternoontea (1005)
Indonesia
March 25, 2008 10:54pm CST
Well.. women also welcome to give their opinion... Maybe because of my culture, woman are not allowed to make the first move and shall wait for the man to do it first. While in my opinion it's ok to make the first move because sometimes I just can't wait...
So I'd like to know whether for man it will be ok or not or if they prefer the woman who make the first move or the woman who just wait...
1 person likes this
7 responses
@getunaddicted (210)
• United States
26 Mar 08
For me it is ok for the woman to give the signals that they would like to go further. Some of us guys have had bad experiences when we make the first move with out the woman giving the signals that it is ok to go further (This does not apply to all guys). The signals should be more subtle as not to make it look like they are desperate for that kind of attention.
In my opinion, if the woman makes the first move it is not a good thing either way. For the woman, it makes them look desperate and maybe too easy (some guys like this). For the guys it is not a good thing because it 1. makes them look like morons who can not read the womans signals. 2. Makes the guy wonder why the woman is trying so hard, These do not apply for all guys.
@getunaddicted (210)
• United States
26 Mar 08
I need to put this on here, though, even though that is my opinion, if a woman came up to me and said "Take me now", I would probably would not pass it up.
@afternoontea (1005)
• Indonesia
26 Mar 08
Wow... we, women don't want to look cheap.. And for your opinion: in that case that you dont really like it when women make the first move but if there is any you won't pass the opportunity..Then it must be that you only want to use that women.. OMG..
@getunaddicted (210)
• United States
26 Mar 08
Oh there are most definitely times that I will most definitely pass on it. If I do not know them I will pass on them. If I know them, and know they are a certain type of woman, then I will pass it up. But if I am dating her and care about her, and she makes the first move I will not pass, because it would tell me that she wants to be with me, and apparently I misread the signals she was sending.. Now I realize on the last part I should have chosen my words better and more clearly, hind sight is always 20/20 as the saying goes.
The way I read your question is if you are dating the person and care about them, and yes even would like to go further. And they made the first move. That is not using (Atleast not in my mind), Using would imply that would be all I wanted, and it is not.
Now let me specify what I meant when I said, 'Make them look Desperate'. When I am saying here is that if the woman has to make the first actual move, it is because she has tried every signal known to get the man to understand what she wants (In my opinion). To me that is not being too easy, or cheap. But rather that either the guy is 1. A moron, who misread the signals that she sent. 2. An insensitive fool who decides it is done his way. 3. The kind that wants to make sure it would work out between them before he goes that far (There are guys like that). It is sad for a woman to have to resort to making the first move, in my opinion (I am not saying it is wrong)
Now please do not misunderstand this part that I am about to say, When I say too easy, sometimes people look at it like this, they see a woman who makes the first move as a floozy, This is usually not my opinion, unless I know for a fact it is what they are (Which is the type I will pass up). Unfortunately many people still view it like this. So regardless of their intention, they could get branded as such (Even if they are not).
Now I want to apologize that I did not write the first response clear enough for you to understand what I am trying to say. I hope that you can understand this one better, and again I apologize if I have offended you in any way, it was not my intention. And most definitely I should have been alot clearer than I was when I wrote about not passing it up (I realize I should have wrote that completely different). I hope you accept my apology.
@vipulchawla (2220)
• India
26 Mar 08
I don't find any problems with that. Infact i would appreciate the courage of the girl if she comes forward and make the first move and i would be too happy to accept.
To tell you about myself, i always hesitate in making the first move so for me, it would be a bonus fi the girl makes the first move. If the woman keeps waiting for me then it would be something kind of a deadlock..both waiting for each other..lol
But anyway i would appreciate her and i don't consider culture being an interruption in the way. So i would like to welcome such moves..
@vipulchawla (2220)
• India
26 Mar 08
It seems like you are willing to make a move but hesitating due to culture boundations.. is it so? So whoz the lucky one?
@afternoontea (1005)
• Indonesia
26 Mar 08
Yes, that was usually what happenned, waiting for each other to make the move..LOL
1 person likes this
@titaniumsoul (1191)
• Singapore
26 Mar 08
I think it is very kind, considerate and brave for women to make the first move. Women should do this more often because men are not worms in women's stomach and we do not know what is the next step if women doesn't make the 1st move. Men and women should have two-way communication, it is very hard for a relationship to have one-way communication. What I don't understand is why does men have to make the first move if women have a crush on the man?
@afternoontea (1005)
• Indonesia
11 Apr 08
Maybe because women are afraid if things gone not as we wish... Like what if the man say no...?
@theprogamer (10534)
• United States
28 Mar 08
For me, its okay if they make the first move (though I'll have some cynicism).
It'd be a refreshing change from the 3,670,945,281 rules to just approaching someone of the opposite gender (all written next to Hannurabi's Code maybe -_-). Also helps get around some of the atrocious games that women can play too, in this area.
@kwenge (2487)
• Kenya
26 Mar 08
Hey Afternoon, the world has really changed. Gone are the days when women used to die inside with love without showing it to the significant other just becuase it is a man to make the first step. Men used to see those women as loose. But now, most men are exposed, they have gone out and mixed with other races and class. Right now i can go out and approach a man and he can accept with no problem.
@afternoontea (1005)
• Indonesia
11 Apr 08
Yes, That is why I wanted to know what men are actually think if women makes the first move..
@johndur (3052)
• Pasig, Philippines
26 Mar 08
i think its a courageous thing to do and very honest...i like those kinds of woman,the one's who's frank and straight to the point...it not necessary that a man should do the first because as always a man wont court a woman if they dont get a hint from a woaman if she also likes them then after that then the man starts to make the move...
@caixf1188sgh (31)
• China
26 Mar 08
I think the women can make the first move.because "lady first",so if the women don't prefer waiting ,they can make the first move.