If you had to give one tip....
@luvingmygirls (493)
United States
March 27, 2008 5:16pm CST
If someone asked you for just one tip on how to be a great parent or how to raise a great kid? If they just wanted to know what you thought the best thing to remember about being a parent was? What tip would you give them???
For me, I say be very observant and listen to your children!!! I think that helps you stay tuned to what they are involved in and where they need to be guided.
4 people like this
15 responses
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
28 Mar 08
I would say let them know your love is unconditional. Too many times children think that if they mess up they can't talk to their parents because they won't love them anymore. If they know they have unconditional love they will talk openly with their parents and be honest with them so we as parents can help them grow.
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
I have experience with this with my parents so I know you are right about this one. Thanks for the response.
@chestyna (113)
•
28 Mar 08
This is very hard question. There is so much in being a parent, but if i would give one advise it would be love your child unconditionally and i think if you love them you would want to listen to them and respect them and talk to them. And they need to feel they are loved to trust you and feel safe.
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
I think you are very right. It not just about loving them, its about them knowing that you love them no matter what.
@butterflygirl (498)
•
27 Mar 08
I would say that the best tip I could give to a parent would be talk to your child. Talk to them about what they can see around them, encourage them to look at their surroundings and to talk about what they see. Explain what's going on in the world around them, for example, explain what that bumble bee is doing and why it's travelling from one flower to another. The world is such and interesting place and we need to encourage our children to take an interest in it.
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
27 Mar 08
Thank you. That is a great tip. I think it is good for us to remember the simple things like looking at the world around us.
@heathcliff (1415)
• United States
28 Mar 08
Just one? I'm going with Attention. Pay attention to what their doing, what they need, what they want to do, what they watch, what they know. Everything! Being involved to that point will make sure you have input in how they grow up!
1 person likes this
@lexus54 (3572)
• Singapore
28 Mar 08
In one word, I would say COMMUNICATION. Keep a communication channel open between you and your kids, listen to them and try and understand them as much as you want them to try and listen to you, and don't alienate them. Know their concerns, their problems and issues, likes and dislikes, and try and bring yourself to their level and speak to them like a best friend would, and build a bond with them so that they can trust and confide in you. Include them in discussions that matter to them,, let them participate and make them feel a part of the family. So many words said, but these are all about communication that's so important in a family relationship between parents and their kids.
1 person likes this
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
Thank you for your response. You are a very wise parent in my eyes.
1 person likes this
@julievy (593)
• United States
28 Mar 08
I would say keep the lines of communiction open. Let them know that they can talk to you about anything at anytime and that you'll listen without being judgmental. Be sure to also share your feeling with them and let them know how you feel about things. It's important that they feel that they can discuss any issue with you. Most of the time I would also wind up listening to my sons' friends' problems too, because they knew I would listen and respond without getting angry.
Thankfully my boys still talk over their problems with me now that they're in their 20's, and I feel like I can talk to them too. It's made our relationships very close.
1 person likes this
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
Wow thats awesome Julie. I think that the key to what you said is "Not Judging". I am so glad that you have so a great relationship with your boys. I hope my girls and I are like that when they get older.
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
28 Mar 08
Listen to what your child has to say, but also don't be afraid to talk to them about any topic they might raise. Communication is vital
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
I think that alot of people feel that way. :) Thanks.
@sugarfloss (2139)
• Malaysia
28 Mar 08
Here's one,"Don't be a friend to your kids,be a parent".Hope this helps!
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
28 Mar 08
That is a really tough question. With all kids being so different and even my own....what worked for one.,.did not for another. I guess if I could give just one all around answer it would be to love them more than anything in this world.....more than your desire for them to love you back.
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
It all starts with love right??!! Thanks for your response.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
28 Mar 08
Listen to them and respect them and they will listen to you later and respect you and also talk to them and take them out on walks and show them the world.be there for them as they grow older and still respect them and they will still respect you.
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
I think you are very right. Sometimes just being there is very important.
@tjades (3591)
• Jamaica
29 Mar 08
Even though I am not yet a mother I think I qualify on the basis that I am an active aunt.
For being a great parent is being able to open up to your child as you would a friend. The same level of respect I have for a friend by not trying to talk them down even when they have a wrong concept. The concept may be wrong but it shows the persons trend of thought.
I have learnt from my nephew for example the art of really listening to what he is saying and I had better pay close attention or else something valuable which I could use to gide him or better yet to understand where he is coming from may just pass me.
He as just turned six and has not yet learnt the art of getting out of a jam by being tricky. He really just tells the truth even if it comes out later on and is really crushed if we dont believe him. So many times I have had to go back and tell him sorry simply because I do not credit him for his smartness. He knows what he is saying but is not equipped with the words to express himself wholly.
This does not deter me from being on my Ps and Qs for signs of lying or any other bad habit he learn later on in life. Experiences of other mother's have taught me to always check out a story before coming to the full defense of your child. You may win the case for your child but in reallity you have really helped the child to cover up something which will blossom into something harmful/hurtful for both of you. I allow my nephew to know that I trust him but I am going to check out a story as thoroughly as possible and then be very open withhim about my findings and of course I dont hold back praises when it is deserved.
Having been children ourselves we can understand that children sometimes outwit their parents. This is far easier if we know exactly how our parents will react to something and then we plan our cover up story accordingly. I would not allow my child to be able to read my every action and reaction. I think we should allow room for catching them off gaurd just incase they become little masters of trickery.
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
28 Mar 08
If there were only one tip I could give it would be enjoy them, they are little growing humans that looks at everything with fresh new eyes, enjoy that wonder
@twinrachel (215)
•
28 Mar 08
I would say to always remember that as long as you are doingw hat you think is best then you are doing the best thing for your child. It is impossible to be the perfect parent.
@luvingmygirls (493)
• United States
29 Mar 08
I think if we try to be perfect we are setting ourselves up for failure and that too will be passed on to our children.
@godfrey884 (17)
• United States
28 Mar 08
I would have to say, Keep the lines of communication open, from day to day all children into teens go through so many changes and a lot of the time they just close out and in the long run it becomes a burden to them and can really affect their future.