why do parents allow their kids to talk back, yell, and swear?

I have a 14 year old grand daughter that was visiting the house one evening with a friend, every other word came out of her mouth was the F word, her grand father said something to her and she turned and said Shut the hell up, can't you see i'm talking. My hair stood on end. I came through the hall way in a rage, I told her I have listen to your with your dirty mouth till I'm sick, and enough is enough. If you are trying to impress your friend, you are making your self look like trash, now go home and not come back until you learn some respect for your self and others. And next time that word comes out of your mouth you will be picking your teeth up off the floor, I told her go ask your mother what would happen to her if she talked like that as a kid. The government has let these kids get away with too much by you not being able to disiapline them. If you so much as slap one of them you go to jail, but then you see shows like Morey Popich with those kids on there that spit in their parents face, hit them cuss them. You have to put a stop to it when it starts, I like the parents that say I tell them they aren't allow to go but they just walk out the door. You are the parent. We need to take back control over our children and the government needs to stay out of it. I'm not taking abuse, I talking letting them know we will no longer tolerate their crap

The answer is simple, parents are scared of their kids these days. We have become more concerned with the children's feelings than their actions. I can remember the couple of times that I raised my voice to my parents, my butt is still sore. I am my childrens instructor and guardian first and foremost. Their feelings really don't affect my decisions one way or another. IF they end up my friend (which isn't even a minor concern) it will be after they have grown up, and can understand why I did what I did to and for them. Parents should stop being their child's "friend" and start putting the fear of God back into these little monsters. I have actually had both of my daughters at one point or another out in public ask me why the kids are yelling at, or even arguing with their parents. It is unfathomable to them to even question my wife and I's authority. Guess I am just one of the old-fashioned hard nosed disciplinarians.

I have seen this before too. I would never let my child act that way...I have seen kids act up in public which is even worse. I think that parent just get tired of dealing with them so they tune them out....but that is not the way to handle it. They need to be disciplined and told that that behaviour will not be tolerated....

I have experienced similar circumstances with people I know and their children. What I do find interesting is that these children are pretty much perfectly well behaved when their parents are AWAY from them; yet as soon as a parent walks into the room it's as if someone flicks a switch on their back and they change instantly! Firstly, no matter how young a child is; they learn VERY quickly what they can and can't get away with. Even babies that are unable to talk yet are masters of this..... Secondly, some parents I guess find it less tiresome to just go with the flow rather than stand their ground. On the flip side too I have also know some parents that promote "freedom of expression" in their children and pretty much allow them to say or do whatever they want. I guess that the outcome of all of these approaches will show itself once these children become adults and raise kids of their own. I can definitely relate to your statement of having to hold your tongue too! But each to their own I suppose and all we can do is raise our own kids the best we can ourselves. At least you only have to watch your niece and not have to take her home with you!

Don't bite your tougne too hard. This is your niece and your sister obviously needs some help. The next time your niece acts up in your presence let her know you do not tolerate or apprecitate her talking to her mother like that. Grab her by the arm take her in the other room and sit her down for a nice Auntie,neice chat. Explain to her in no uncertain terms that this behavior is not tolerated, and that you will not sit by and watch your sister be treated this way by anyone especially her own daughter who should love and respect her. Sometimes it takes an entire village to raise a child and as her aunt you definately have the authority to put a halt to the situation that your witnessing. I am sure your sister will thank you for it and your neice will learn from it. Best wishes

Personally for me, she has to stop this attitude as early as this time because this kid might grow up doing that to other people as her way to vent out she is upset! I know being a single mom is very tough but, it's not an excuse to raise a brat kid! She can do it as long as she wants too! Maybe she just love the baby too much and make her tolerate all these things!

I have two kids of my own and now that they are teens they are allowed to swear (mildly and only in certain situations/around certain ppl) BUT they NEVER sass me, swear at me, kick up a fuss cause they know damn well I will slap them in their mouths if they ever do...They could be in their 50s and STILL they wont get away with that crap!

The problem comes in over the last twenty years society has been sending the message to parents that they should be "friends with their children and not parents". By friend I mean one who is buddy, buddy and talks only with them. They don't discipline, they reason only, and they have to make sure their child always "likes them". Then you also add in the problem of people and children screaming "abuse". Children are taught from the moment they enter any type of day care "that if mommy or daddy do anything to make you feel bad you are to call 911" They don't bother to explain to these kids what will happen then or what defines feeling bad so if mommy says no to something they dial 911. Yes I have seen this happen. The cops find that there is nothing to it but in the mean time that call stays on the parents record till the child is 18 and if there are more calls it makes it look worse. You also have many people in society who will butt in when they see a parent disciplining a child and accuse them of abuse. I'm not talking beating a kid senseless but simple discipline. Parents end up being more worried of losing their kids then trying to discipline. Until we allow parents to be parents again you are going to see this continue.

If I will be a parent, I will not really allow my kids to talk back or yell at us. It all goes with the proper upbringing brought by the people around the kids. Children should be taught the right manners and behavior at an early age.

I think it is usually case of the parents just not knowing what to do to prevent it. You want a child to be able to say how they feel, but also take resposiblity for how their actions and words affect others. It is a very delicate balance.

Single parent or not, children need to show respect. Actually children need to be taught respect. I am at a lost as to why parents allow their children to behave in this manner. However generally speaking children learn from example

I'm not a parent either, so I'm no expert. I don't know why mothers let their kids get away with it - I'm still trying to work that one out when I see my cousin with her children, they get away with murder. Maybe in this instance your sister(?) is compensating for being a single parent and maybe having to play the role of a father as well as a mother is taking it's toll? I know it's no excuse and if that was my child she would have had a smack! It's a tough question especially when the law now is against smacking your own kids! Personally, I don't think it does any great harm if the parent smacks their own children occasionally when they've done something wrong - I'm all for discipline but within reason.

I read about it.I think it was the mother's false.You said that "She is a single parent". Maybe it was the true reason.She showed her great love to his child.She give his kid what she wanted.Probably,she thinked that it can make her kid a good environment.But she was wrong!Children needed constraints.Only through this can them grow healthy in mind and body. That's what I want say.I also think this question is a international question for it happened in everycontry of the world!

good question. i babysit for a 4 year old little boy and i know his mom quite well, in fact she works for DYFS. he does not listen and i have to keep repeating myself over and over and he is very disrespectful and talks horribly to his mom. not just what he says but how he says it. he screams at her and she just jumps to attention. well, not me. when he is at my home he has to be respectful and if he is not then he does not get any privileges. he is the way he is because she does not discipline him at the time he is doing something wrong. when he yells at her she just does what he wants so he stops yelling. instead she has to tell him right then and there that unless he talks nicely and stops screaming she will not listen to him. i do it and it works just fine for me. also when he does something wrong i make him take a time out and sit quietly on the couch and i make sure i tell him why he is getting a time out. children have to understand from an early age that there are consequences to their actions and that there is a proper way to behave and get what you want. if they are not taught this then the are not going to do it.

Hiiiii All the blame will go to the mother since we cannot blame the child as she is only 6 years old.

i think now parents are giving too much freedom to children. whatever may that be. be it things, gifts or attitudes. i have seen that many children behave like this. i also do not support this.

children have to be taught to obey their parents...only bible teaches us how to do that...they must be brought up in the fear of the lord,love for others and care and also prayer and bible reading..the word of god will cleanse us,teach us ...knowledge puffs up but love builds up...pray for them everyday to lord jesus christ..he undersatnds u...

That wont be happening repeatedly if she had blocked the bad attitude right away, the first time her child did it.. the child is in her learning stage; she'll listen if she's given the discipline act. This problem is sometimes the parent's fault, they allow such things to happen... or sometimes, it's with the type of environment a child is currently living, she's just adopting the things that she sees.

My children only talk back to me if they didn't do anything wrong. If they know that they are wrong, they wouldn't say anything. I will never let them swear and yell at me. or else i' will twist their mouth. I have practice them earlier to respect the older people and teach them the do's and don't.

In a democratic country, we uphold the value of freedom of speech but I think that there has to be limits. A child should have respect for his/her parents because if it weren't for his/her folks, he/she wouldn't be alive right now. We owe our lives to our parents. They were the ones who molded us into the people that we are now.