My friend's 9 year old pees the bed

I definately agree with you, sometime needs to be done now and he could have a medical problem. My little girl is 9 and she may have an accident twice a year. Accidents are expected in children but this is more than an occasional accident. And to me putting trash bags under him is not the answer. It's almost saying that it is ok and not a problem. It will also pose an embarrasing situation if he ever stays at a friends house. I think the best thing she can do is visit a Dr to rule out a medical problem. If there is no problem they could offer some good advice.

This could be a serious medical issue. My oldest son peed the bed until he was 12 and the doctors told me he would grow out of it, which he did. When he hit puberty the peeing of the bed just went away. It just took him longer than most. It's very embarrassing for the child and the parent. And it is very hurtful to have others believe that they are not doing enough about it. I don't know how many comments I recieve on this issue and we finally just stopped going anywhere until he grew out of it. However the pooping problem could be a sign of encoprisis. I think I spelled that correctly. This is a medical problem that 1 out of three children suffer from. Because it is a very embarrassing medical issue it is far too undiscussed. Also, most family doctors do not know how to treat it. You have to go to a specialist for that area of the body. (sorry I can't remember what they are called.) Shortly after my oldest stopped peeing the bed I began finding garbage bags with soiled underwear. Or he would wash his laundry (he was 12 or 13) and the washing machine would be full of feces. I confronted him about it and he was so embarrassed that at first he tried to lie about it. We finally bought him some adult diapers because everything our family doctor was doing was not working. Finally we were told by a family friend to take him to a specialist. He had been doing it for about 1 1/2 years at this point. The family doctor was NOT helping and my son was so ashamed and embarrassed all the time. He had lost a lot of weight. We were very concerned. A lot of our other friends and family were voicing concerns about our parenting and giving advice on how to punish him for his actions to get him to stop. After all this couldn't always be an accident. How do you not know you are going in your pants. We took him to the specialist and he was diagnosed with encoprisis. The doctor explained that this disease causes the child not to feel the urge to go and sometimes they can't even feel it when they do go. He also told us that most kids go undiagnosed for years because of the embarrassment and the fear that they are bad kids or bad parents. He was put on medicine to clear out his system and then he had to go on a lower dose for about 2 years. He began to put the weight back on. Within a few months he stopped having the issues. My best advice is to tell them my story. Tell them to find a doctor who might have a clue. And tell them there is NOTHING to be embarrassed about. This is not a reflection on their child or their parenting. This is probably a medical issue and they want to get it under control soon because if undiagnosed this can cause long term medical issues that can not only last this child's whole life but can shorten that life.

Something does need to be done especially about the soiling himself and not saying anything. For something like that, a 're-potty training' would be something useful. Its something that may need time. Also, I can be a physical problem with the child in which case your friend should discuss that problem with the child's doctor. After potty training my 2 boys I ask their doctor about bed wetting because that was the hardest part I had with my oldest son. He told me that part of it may be genetic, if the parents used to wet the beds as children, their kids might too. My husband did a lot when he was little and we found out that reducing the water intake before bed does help. Also have them use the potty before bed time and also later that night as well. Pretty much you have to wake them up and have them use the potty. This does take time. My son no longer wears training pants at night anymore, but I am still doing this routine of having him use the bathroom before he sleeps and taking him again right before I go to sleep which is about 2-3 hours after he sleeps. This can vary, it took me a while to get the timing right. Hopefully that will help for your friend.

I agree Something needs to be fixed with this since the kid is 9 he should be trained to use the bathroom already, and pooping his pants, that should not be happening either, maybe child services needs to look at this to see what is happening.

Have your friend take her son to see his doctor as a child that age that fouls himself is either having a serious physical problem or is retarded or has some other mental or emotional problems. the doctor should be able to sort things out and if necessary recommmend seeing a mental health person or a consuler or a renal doctor. a normal nine year old knows to go to the bathroom when its necessary so something is very wrong, and its not just being disobedient or ornery either. he needsto be seen by a medical doctor.

I still wet the bed i have to wear pampers active fit 4+

If this is a recent turn of events and he just suddenly started doing this it could be a sign of abuse. Children who are molested or sexually abused tend to regress into bedwetting and other behavioral issues.

Its normal for kids' bladders to take a while to develop but this sounds excessive. Yes, the child should be seen by a pediatrician and see why he is having accidents so often like that. Parents sometimes are in denial when something is wrong with their child, and I know this from experience. I hope the parents will accept that something is not right and get the child seen by a dr.

i have seen many children having this. actually due to feeling of embassasement many do not admit it or consult doctor. it may be he is not all doing this intentinally. may be he is having some problem. when he is pooped on pant, it may be he is having some real problem. better to consult with doctor and till the rprblem is solved, put him in adult diapers.

His son needs great attention. He lacks of it that is why he is doing that. His parents should let him realize that what he is doing is wrong. They should let him realize that he is a grown boy already and what would his other playmates say if they knew he was doing that still at his age. Tell you friend that if her son still doesn't change after talking to him about this things try giving him a price if he doesn't wet his pants in a day. Tell her to tell his son that he will have a treat if he tries very hard to go to the bathroom when he needs to pee or poo. Or another thing she can do is let him pee before he goes to bed. Set a time for him to seat on the toilet bowl for a while for him to have a scheduled time to poop. When he gets settled to that time he'll be doing it often that time and your friend won't have trouble with it anymore. Tell her to have him go to the Toilet as often as he needs to just to get him familiarized that he needs to go there when he needs to. I have 5 kids and when they were learning we had them seat on the bowl for a certain period of time to pee or poo. Before sleeping, when waking up, before going out of the house and coming in. It does work. She just needs a little patience with his son.

i would definetly tell her to take the child to the doctor now.there could be an underlying medical problem. one of my ex's had two members of his family one 5 and one 14(!) that still wore diapers.the 14 yr old progressed to adult diapers by that time. i only know because he asked me to change the 5 year old once(i refused). so,it definetly can continue.

Maybe he needs to see a doctor coz there must be a cause. Tell her to seek professional help for her son.

My stepsister wet the bed until she was about 12 or 13 when they finally took her to the doctor as it was NOT just going away. She did not wet herself or poo during the day though, it only happened at night when she was sleeping. The doctor put her on meds because they said that she slept so hard that there was no way possible for her to wake up on her own and they give her some kind of medication but I do not know what it was. But this very well could be a medical problem. I hope they find out what it is though.