My daughter's boyfriend is 10 years older than her

My father is 69 y.o. and mother is ten years younger. They have been married for 33 years. That would be a proof that it is ok. Although it is not a perfect marriage, but it did survive. Right now, my sister's boyfriend is 17 y.o. older than her... I guess, age doesn't matter at all. In love nothing matters.

It's quite natural to worry hun, but your daughter sounds like she has her head screwed on ok and, after all, the age difference isn't such a hurdle really.

Well you can just admonish her to finish school before getting really serious with the guy. Personally I am thankful I met my fiance in my final year of school. I did seriously get distracted. He's 11 years older than I. My parents were initially alarmed, and there was a lot of craziness that ensued because of my relationship, but nothing that true love (love of family + Love of God included) couldn't fix. :) For me, it would be okay... If she finished school first. :) http://mobileexpressions.blogspot.com http://nenyathegeek.blogspot.com http://nenyalorien.multiply.com

Hello my friend. I wouldn't worry too much about it if I were you. Seems that this man is mature and is definitely serious about your daughter. Just observe from far, I'm sure he means well and see how their relationship goes and all that. However, what does this man do for a living..? If he's providing well for your daughter in terms of love and happiness that would be great. It's more the best if he is financially stable.

I can understand why you are worried, it is your daughter when all is said and done. I think that if she was my daughter, my main worry would be that at 28 this man could be ready to settle down and start a family, whereas at 18 my daughter has a whole good future ahead of her, and if she gets into university then she will be studying for a career. I guess I would be worried that the man would try and deter her from it in order to settle down. I think that I would try and talk to her and make sure that she is focused on her future for university rather than thinking about marriage and children, but I would not interfere in the relationship or anything but just stand quietly on the sidelines!! I do not think that the age gap is much to worry about, it is only 10 years which is not too bad, better 10 than 30 or more.

I would not worry about it as you said he seems like a nice guy. The only way I would be worried, if he had been in and out of relationships before and had children here there and everywhere. He sounds like a nice guy my son is 21 still at home and at the way he is going he will still be at home when he is 28. I would just see how things go that is all you can do at present.

hi michael, normally, an older guy is good because he is more mature. it is good, coz like my parents, my dad is older than my mom for 10 years. but sometimes, i just think that if the guy is older while the girl is very young, like a teenager, he might violate her trust and naivity. but i think your daughter is already old enough to take care of herself. just continue to guide her, if she is open to it. good day dear! :-)

My parents are about 10 yrs apart as far as age is concerned and they've completed 30 years of marriage..the guy you've spoken about seems pretty decent. Advise her against making any longterm plans at this stage and tell her to concentrate on her career. Once she has a good career she will be in a better position to make decisions about her personal life.

The more you object to your daughter's choice, the more appealing this young man is going to be to her. Let it go, and just be there for her if things end badly. She is an adult now, though probably with a teens mind some of the time, and she needs to make her own mistakes in order to find her place in this world. Her being your little girl is always going to make you want to protect her, but the best protection you can give her is your unconditional love and someone to turn to when things do go wrong. She is always going to be Daddy's little girl, and will always look for your approval, but she also needs to find her indepnedant self. I am the same age as this guy, and my partner is 24 years older than me. The age gap isn't all that noticable, except for the physical differences that age brings, and we are doing just fine, 7 years worth of fine in fact. What you are experiencing is actually normal, your little girl is all grown up. Now, instead of focusing on losing your little girl, focus instead on the future joys she will bring to your life.

I can readily understand your concern as a father of a 19 year old girl myself. I once had a two year relationship with a woman 13 years older than me and received all the "advice" about the age gap. The bottom line I think is that there is nothing wrong with the age gap, especially as he seems a hard worker with a focused approach, but that from the parents' perspective it just doesn't feel right. I have no advice to give you, she has to live her life. So long as you are not seen to judge and be there if and when it all gets too much for her or ends; I don't think that you can do more. Good luck.

I wouldn't worry about that to much. Like you say girl's mature quicker than boy's and with him still at home at 28 seem's like a child, so maybe they are suited in term's of maturity. My sister is 23 and her fella is in his early 40's. They have been together about 8 year's and have 2 children, so that show's age gap's can work. Just think how my mom felt, 15 year old girl and man in 30's, not alot parent's can do though if the kid's are made up over the other person.

I wouldnt worry to much. As you said girls mature faster than guys so hes probably closer to her own maturity level. I'm 25 and my boyfriend is 12 years older than me. I find hes "just right" for the maturity level i dont go oh god he seems sooooo old or omg hes so immature i just wanna tell him to grow up. When i started dating him i was curious about how many people are actually with someone their own age and around my area i found theres more people with a gap of 5 years or more married or dating for a long period of time than those in a closer age range. I do however know that my mom was concerned about the age difference until she met my boyfriend. I never did figure out why.

Wouldn't it be nice if our future spouses were the exact same age as us? Unfortunately, we don't live in a world that perfect. Does she love him? Does he treat her right? I think the best you can do here is just to ask that they wait to get married if they start talking about marriage. That way she has longer to make sure he is the right guy for her. Other than that, if she really loves him, no matter what you say she will not change her mind about dating him. Also, they are just dating, they're not getting married or anything as of yet. Some relationships work out just fine with an age gap. Just be thankful that she's not trying to date a man that's as old or older than her father.

well my friend dont worry about that situation that is happening in your daughter... it is simply defined as normal event.... if they love each other no matter what age gap they have,.. they will get exactly what they wanted near future... its only 10 years, who knows? God, is the one who knows, just entrust everything to God... dont worry, coz God will lead the way for them... God bless... :)

I can understand your concern as a parent. My husband is ten years older than me so I can say from experience that the age gap is not a big deal. Age is in fact just a number when you are talking about adults. It's a different situation when it's a child. I wouldn't worry about it and just see what happens. I know that is easier said than done because she is your daughter, you are always going to worry.

Well for me age doesn't matter as long as they love each other and I see that the guy is very nice and working that is good for me.

So, other than the age thing you are okay with this guy dating your daughter? From my own experince it is not always a bad thing. My husband is over 8 years older than I am and we have been together for over 16 years now.

The only thing I would be worried bout is that this man is in fact almost 30, which means he will probably be looking to settle down soon. ANd your daughter she is not getting to the age as to where she is gone to start having fun, clubs and soon bars. Just make sure that it doesn't get to the point where she forgets her studies and also her friends. Watch from a far to make sure he does not try and control her actions.

I don't think you have too much to worry about there, if your daughter is mature for her age, and he seems' like a nice guy other than the age gap. My husband was seven years older than I was and we never had any big problems. Of course I was thirty when I met him and he was thirty seven so we were both really matured.yet if Ihad met him when I was twenty I think i still would have married him.Dads do worry and thats only natural really. You could think of it this way she is 18 and add four years for being a girl and being more mature so that would make it 22 then dock him four years and that would make him 24 so there you have it. lol

I think you shouldn't worry about that. I am 23yrs, and my boyfriend is 8 yrs older than me, but I don't think there is any gap between us. He is mature, hardworking, considerate, sometime fatherly.As I have less social experience than him, so he always give me some good advice. If you are sure that he is good guy, then you shouldn't be worry