I was thinking last night about inattentive adult children..
By dragon54u
@dragon54u (31634)
United States
May 10, 2008 9:31am CST
Because I doubt my sons will remember Mother's Day, their dad never made a big deal of it because, after all, I wasn't HIS mother! So the boys never remember my birthday or anything but not because they don't love me.
Anyway, I was thinking back when I was their ages, they're 19 and 20 right now. Man, was I self-absorbed and totally inconsiderate! I would often remember my mom's birthday or mother's day a day or two afterward and I can imagine how hurt she was. It wasn't that I didn't love her, I was just too caught up in my own life and didn't have the maturity to put things in perspective.
So, if your children forget you on your special days it's not that they don't love you--they just have their priorities skewed wrong. They'll eventually straighten up and get it together but they'll never stop loving you!
You moms that are alone, with your kids away from home and sometimes across the country, remember this. Don't feel alone if they don't call or send a card. It'll all change eventually.
Happy Mother's Day!
6 responses
@Barb42 (4214)
• United States
8 Jul 08
My son and daughter will call me on Mother's Day. My son will say I have a card and forgot to send it. And my daughter never buys cards, and I understand with her having 4 kids and being a single Mom.
My husband is not into cards or holidays. He could care less if he ever got a card. Me, on the other hand would love to get one for the special days. But I have learned to live with it. I occasionally get a card from him, sometimes electronically. And we go out for some of those things. But it doesn't bother me anymore like it did when we were younger.
I think nowdays there is too much too keep the kids minds occupied and they let those days slip by without a thought. Perhaps, when they get older and are forgotten, the error of their ways will make them understand. 
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
8 Jul 08
I would love to get a card but although I was always sending people cards and let them sign them, too, they're just not into them. As you say, they'll realize their errors when they grow older!
@Barb42 (4214)
• United States
9 Jul 08
My daughter used to always send a card, but being single and raising 4 kids, she's about completely given up on buying them anymore. And, I don't blame her. She does call, though.
By the way, my son did come to pick up a gift a cousin had left for their baby who is due soon. But he didn't bring my card.
@spoiled311 (5500)
• Philippines
10 May 08
oh i feel bad that your sons forget such special ocassions. and although they are good kids throughout the year, this special ocassion just kind of tops everything right?
i am married now but with no kids. i remember my mom and also my mother in law. me and my hubby make it a point to greet both sets of parents on their special days. and i think they appreciate that.
i hope your sons will appreciate the kind of mother that you are to them. even if they are grownups, that they will still look out after you :-)
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
10 May 08
Thank you! It's wonderful that you and your husband honor your moms and love them so much. My sons will eventually come to realize that special days are rather important but as long as they love me every day I'm not going to feel badly is they don't remember. I'm blessed to have them and I'm very proud of them!
@mbs730 (2147)
• Canada
11 May 08
My kids are still young but one day they will become that way. I know how hurt I would be if my kids did not acknowledge Mother's Day. But I will remember this because sometimes their priorities are messed up. However, that is not acceptable, and that would be a good opportunity to instill a little bit of guilt into them (which to me, is not always a bad thing if in small doses)
1 person likes this
@mrsbrian (1949)
• United States
10 May 08
Well for me its mothers day everyday, my ex was like that you not MY MOTHER! my reply was no but I am the mother of your children. being a mother is a special day everyday, even tho mine are grown and gone, its the little things they do or say when we talk or see each other that makes it mothers day for me any day.I dont need a special day set aside for me to know I am loved or to recieve presents.
But you are right as they grow and mature they will see it all different, HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO YOU FROM ME!
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
10 May 08
Thank you!
One of my sons called me today just for no reason and the other called yesterday. Even if they don't remember the special day, I know they love me. And remembering how forgetful I was at that age, it's okay with me if they don't remember because I know they love me every day.
@grammasnook (1871)
• United States
10 May 08
Both my sons now live in Kentucky, My oldest one of 25 at the begining of the year will say to me. Okay mom here it is I work long hours and I know I do not call you enough because of finances... So Happy Bday, Happy mothers day, Happy all the Holidays. He tells me just remember you are my best friend and I love you always. Now my 22 year old that lives in Kentucky he is the opposite he will not let a holiday go by without a phone call or a card. He has always been like that. My husband always made sure that the children knew my bday and Mothers day so he embedded it into them lol. Oh and the thing your hubby saying I am not your mother my dad use to do that to my mother until we got old enough to buy for her and explain but daddy she is the mother to your children would it kill you to buy her some flowers to make the day special. He never missed Mothers day again and Mom was very very happy!
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
10 May 08
You and your mother are very blessed! Good for you kids for sticking up for your mom! I always bought my husband a little something for Father's Day because he was my sons' dad and always thanked his parents on their days for giving him to me. Nevermind that it turned out badly, he gave me two wonderful children.
Your sons are sweet, to know you're remembered is one of the precious things that make life worthwhile!
