is being protective of your children a bad thing?

I think you protect your child is correct,when they have no the sense of judgement to do right thing. you need to guarantees your child not to be affected by bad gays or bad thing. the young children are more likely to form what the are familiar with into a habit. you do right.keep an eye on your child keeping them from bad gays.

over potecting your kids is a big mistake because some time s they never grow

I don't think what you do to protect your boys sounds out of line or anything. In fact, it sounds very reasonable. It's pretty much how I feel about my grandsons [I live with them and their mom]. We just really need to know whose house they're going to since anything could happen if you haven't met the people. We are trying to let our boys have a little more freedom but at 6 and almost 9, it's still too early and they aren't going to like how strict we are either but oh well, we love them and want them to be safe. That's all any good parent can do.

If more parents felt like you do, we wouldn't have nearly the number of kids disappearing or sexually abused as we do now. I was overprotective. My two boys weren't allowed to go to a public bathroom without me outside the door until they were big enough to defend themselves. If I was at all doubtful of what I heard going on, I'd barge in there! I was always commended by the men that were in there, too, even though we were all rather embarrassed! I checked out their friends and the parents, I made sure they were really going where they said they were. They're grown now and they appreciate what I did. Too many parents don't watch their children. They go shopping and the children run off and are never seen again, or get run over by a car as their mom chats with someone. I see this most often in "upscale" neighborhoods and stores, for some reason they feel safe in an area they don't feel threatened in. But there are no barriers to child molesters and kidnappers, no amount of money can keep them away and only constant vigilance will protect our kids.

You can't be careful enough, it's not strangers that are as much a threat in my opinion as it the immediate family.

I don't think you're being overly protective, I think you're being cautious and, in this day and age, you need to be. I forget the statistic on the number of children who will be in contact with an online predator (I heard it on the radio driving in this morning) but it was a 1 in (single digit) stat. Children cannot guage what's best for them so natuarally they are going to fight against you and your husband's efforts to keep them safe.

hey Cj, I still have a 13 year old son at home, and you can not be too careful. I am the same way when it comes to him going to a friends house for the entire evening. I have to know the parents. I want to know what kind of environment their home is. I have passwords to his email accounts and IM'ing accounts. When he is on the computer his bedroom door is left open so that I can wander by occasionally to see what he is up to. It is not that I distrust him rather I distrust the person at the other end of the internet. Every once in while I help him clean his bedroom there by being able to go through drawers and closets. He has two older married brothers, and poor kid can not get away with anything because of the experiences I have had raising the older 2 LMAO he is a good kid however and does not complain, he knows he is just wasting his breath in doing so.

hi cjgrooms ! I think its cool that you monitor your kids, if only more people did so, there'd be a lot less of them wandering the streets getting into trouble. there is so much more available to kids and the manipulating forces that affect their lives means you cant be to careful. one thing I wanted to ask was when will you step back and stop protecting them 16,18?

It is not bad if you are not OVERLY protective. My grandmother wouldn't let me go ANYWHERE. I was not allowed to have friends over to my house or go to thier house until my senior year of high school. There are things like NetNanny that will keep track of what your kids do online and it will send you a report. There is also this other program, but I can't remember the name right now, that when the kid goes on it will pop up a window telling them they are not allowed on that site. I had it for a trail time and it was SO funny to see my son's face when it popped up. I still check sites even now, and the computer must stay in the room I am in for them to use it.

They are children. No matter what you do or how you try to explain you will be the bad guy. You are a parent. It is in the job description. I agree with you, keep track, be involved. I too get accused of being over protective. To this I say "Thank-you" Why? Because we only get one shot at this, I intend to give it my all and do it to the best of my ability. Just wait, one day they will be parents!

i think being an over protective is better than negligent. in the first place, it's your kids. whatever consequences they suffer from their mistakes, your conscience is the most affected. although you can't really be sure of their activities most of the time, at least somehow they are always reminded that you never like them to go wrong. i myself is an over protective dad.

That really depends on how old your children are as they will grow older they will need to be given more leeway but you are right that they need your protection until they are old enough to care for themselves and I commend you on caring what they watch on the computer. but you will need to gradually loosen the reins as they get into their later teens and give them some space to try their wings but you should also remind them you are always in the wings and if they need to they can go to you with anything and you will listen.

I don't being protective is a bad thing. I think thats what we as parents are supposed to do. I do think that you can be over protective and shelter your children so much that they aren't able to handle many of the things which life puts in front of us.

Personally I think there needs to be some more over protective parents. If more parents were like ours were there would be a lot less meaness in the world today because the consequences would not be worth the few minutes of glory it took to do some mischievous deed.

No, being protective is not a bad thing and as you found out growing up if parents are to busy to bother there are all kinds of predators out there just waiting to do it for them.